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depthss

depthss

376 days 🪦
Dec 12, 2023
40
I just feel so empty all the time, just nothingness constantly
The only feeling I really get regularly is annoyance when I see anything relating to life, romance/love, happiness/hope, or just people enjoying being alive in general
The very thought of having friends feels draining and I feel physically repulsed by the idea of physical intimacy, even if it isn't sexual.
I just don't know what's wrong with me, I'm always either apathetic or hateful and I know I was just never meant to be alive. I can't wait until the day comes where I can finally CTB, that's all I think about now
 
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bipolar22

bipolar22

Member
Aug 31, 2022
99
I know I wasn't either. My mother told me she just missed the uppertunity to abort me. So it all makes sense to me since she told me that.
Best wishes my friend
 
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SilverTiger

SilverTiger

Life is the night, I seek the warmth of the sun.
Apr 18, 2024
105
I just feel so empty all the time, just nothingness constantly
The only feeling I really get regularly is annoyance when I see anything relating to life, romance/love, happiness/hope, or just people enjoying being alive in general
The very thought of having friends feels draining and I feel physically repulsed by the idea of physical intimacy, even if it isn't sexual.
I just don't know what's wrong with me, I'm always either apathetic or hateful and I know I was just never meant to be alive. I can't wait until the day comes where I can finally CTB, that's all I think about now
Hi Depthss.

I can understand completely, life and being social feels draining doesn't it? All of the minutiae of human interaction... It is almost like there is a battery in you, and enough social bullshit will deplete it till it is all gone, I am also guessing that as time marches on you feel that battery getting weaker and weaker? Like a phone that has been left on charge and depleted once too many times.

My own mother had two miscarriages before me, and it is obvious that my father coerced her into having me because my older brother had developmental issues. So I completely understand this aspect of your post as well.

Why is it fair, that your battery is constantly being drained because two people couldn't keep it in their trousers?

I have no words of advice to give you, I am currently in the process of losing the war to these two, so all I can say is...

From a stranger on SaSu, I wish you the best, and may you find the peace you seek.

Good luck, champ.
 
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EmptyHeaded

EmptyHeaded

Experienced
Jan 24, 2024
223
I feel the same. Some people just weren't meant to be born.
 
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FuneralCry

FuneralCry

She wished that she never existed...
Sep 24, 2020
34,892
I was certainly also never meant for something so dreadful, futile and undesirable as existence, more than anything I really wish I never existed at all. But anyway I hope that you eventually find the freedom you search for.
 
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Unknown21

Unknown21

この世界は残酷だ。
Apr 25, 2023
758
I was actually not supposed to be born, I was not wanted from the beginning, I was born on contraception. You're not alone.
 
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divinemistress36

divinemistress36

Visionary
Jan 1, 2024
2,000
The stork accidentally dropped me off here
 
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MatrixPrisoner

MatrixPrisoner

Enlightened
Jul 8, 2023
1,168
99% of people that exist, have existed or will exist in the future are victims of people that had no business whatsoever giving birth to children.

The best we can do is stop this meaningless perpetuation of the human race by not having children of our own.

Of course this is ideal thinking and people will continue to reproduce despite the odds. That is why society will never get better. Only continue to get worse.
 
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