Discussion Would you want anyone to, or let someone 'save' you? Poll

[Some place nice]

I am trying to escape my home life. So if they know about my situation and are willing to take me away from my mom, than I wouldn't mind being saved. If they save me and let me back with my mom than no, I wouldn't want to be saved.

 

[KillerIsMe]

no. I am at a point of trauma that simply existing in a first person perspective is triggering and causes feelings of hopelessness. It inherently has unbearable negative connotations. I am ruined. I don't like life itself

Even if I was made normal, developed a social life, had interests, had a career, the whole thing is already ruined for me. I've been changed by trauma into something that cannot metabolize true joy.

There is no chance anyone or anything could ever be enough to compensate for the fact that I'm me.

I am aware that this is a cognitive distortion; I don't care. Fix the distortion then.

 

[Smelly_ballz]

No. People have tried to help me, and while it does help temporarily, it does not fix me and I eventually fall back again. I was born like this, all fucked up.

 

[sserafim]

By this- I don't mean stop you during an attempt. I mean- in life generally. If someone took a real interest in your situation- and tried to help- would you welcome it? Do you think anyone could help you?

I'm not sure whether I'm going to get aggro for posting this here... but to defend the decision- I don't think this is about recovery. I think a lot of suicidal people feel abandoned or, they don't actually want people to 'help' them.

Either I imagine because they don't like being 'mothered'/nagged. They may feel like they know themselves better than anyone else could and find the inteference patronizing. Or, they may have trust issue with people if they have been let down in the past- so, don't want to rely on someone so heavily again. Or- they simply can't see what anyone could do to change their situation that they couldn't do themselves. They may feel their situation is impossible to change satisfactorily.

Personally, I lie more in the- 'I don't want anyone to try and 'save' me' camp. How about you?

I don't want to be "saved" because I don't want to be, and I don't think I even can be. I'm neurodivergent in a neurotypical world, and this is the main cause of my troubles. I don't want to have to fit into society or into this world. I don't want to conform. I'm not meant for this world and I never will be. I also don't want to engage with the world or participate in society either. I don't see a point in living in this world, one which I don't belong in, and never will.

 

[Monkeyman]

Depends on what "saving" would mean for the person, I guess... sometimes they want to "save" you in ways that just pile up more stress.

 

[WAITING TO DIE]

I don't want to be "saved" because I don't want to be, and I don't think I even can be. I'm neurodivergent in a neurotypical world, and this is the main cause of my troubles. I don't want to have to fit into society or into this world. I don't want to conform. I'm not meant for this world and I never will be. I also don't want to engage with the world or participate in society either. I don't see a point in living in this world, one which I don't belong in, and never will.

Same.
When I was younger I tried so hard to conform and fit into society even though I didn't want to.
I felt like an alien on earth and being around people stressed me out because most of them are fake and I'm no good at social interactions.
I knew I was different than others, yet couldn't understand what it was.
After being admitted to the psych ward with chronic depression I was finally diagnosed with aspergers at age 20.
I no longer try to fit into society and engage with with the outside world as little as possible.
I'm done with it all now and just want to cease exisisting.

 

[KafkaF]

Yes, but only one person, maybe two, could do it.

Really, the only person who has a chance at single-handedly changing my mind would be my previous girlfriend. If she suddenly texted or called or messaged me that she missed me and she wanted to get back together, I would probably change my mind and be willing to fight again.

The maybe is for my first girlfriend. We always understood each other on a deeper level. I feel like if anyone could talk to me about this stuff it would be her. However, we're not really friends. We talk maybe once or twice a year at most. And she has no idea what's going on in my life. So there's no real chance of this happening. And, to be fair, the chance that she could actually change my mind in any way is very, very low.

I would welcome a random sweet and loving girl to comfort me though. Not in any way that could actually change my mind. But if there was some sweet girl around my age who wanted to, idk, come over to my place. Make some dinner together. Then lay in bed cuddling, watching a movie. Talking about some of the stuff I'm going through. I'd accept that help.

Not that that's likely... I have no idea who that person would even be.

Got that idea put into my mind because I was watching some videos where people talk about what their last day before their attempt was like. And I remember one person talking about trying to end things, then telling a female friend of theirs, the person then spending that evening baking cookies with them and holding them and letting them cry. I would welcome that for sure, even if I don't think it would do anything to change my mind.

 

[Eternal🌈Rainbow]

I am at a point of trauma that simply existing in a first person perspective is triggering and causes feelings of hopelessness. It inherently has unbearable negative connotations. I am ruined.

We have different situations and a different story, but I just wanted to tell you that I felt you so much in this. It's exactly what I say when I explain what's wrong with me. It's not that I can't live, but even exist. Existing comes before living. It's existing here, as me, in my reality, what I can't bear. And I feel that hopelessness and despair. I can't exist in my reality, as me, through me, after everything that has happened (trauma & abandonment).
Much love to you

 

[user56765567]

I would say no as well. I think that even if people were able to "save" me from my physical and mental problems and my circumstances and situations with my family and society at large, I would still find a way to ctb. The biggest problems I have with this place has more to do with what this place is fundamentally and how it is ran mechanically speaking like everything that makes this place tick and the things that results from it doing so. I think that since people can't turn back time and bend reality to create new and better concepts to deal with the old current ones, they would not be able to convince me to want to stay and participate here.

 

[Deleted member 65988]

Yes, if there was someone who actually really wanted to help and who had the means to do so I'll definitely consider it.

Agreed.

 

[SNastablesalt]

By this- I don't mean stop you during an attempt. I mean- in life generally. If someone took a real interest in your situation- and tried to help- would you welcome it? Do you think anyone could help you?

I'm not sure whether I'm going to get aggro for posting this here... but to defend the decision- I don't think this is about recovery. I think a lot of suicidal people feel abandoned or, they don't actually want people to 'help' them.

Either I imagine because they don't like being 'mothered'/nagged. They may feel like they know themselves better than anyone else could and find the inteference patronizing. Or, they may have trust issue with people if they have been let down in the past- so, don't want to rely on someone so heavily again. Or- they simply can't see what anyone could do to change their situation that they couldn't do themselves. They may feel their situation is impossible to change satisfactorily.

Personally, I lie more in the- 'I don't want anyone to try and 'save' me' camp. How about you?

I'm holding on to hope that someone will. Just so I know that what I'm doing wasn't the right choice - even though I know it was. to find out that people DO care about me enough to try and "save" me, even if I end up in a mental hospital.

I don't want to be "saved" because I don't want to be, and I don't think I even can be. I'm neurodivergent in a neurotypical world, and this is the main cause of my troubles. I don't want to have to fit into society or into this world. I don't want to conform. I'm not meant for this world and I never will be. I also don't want to engage with the world or participate in society either. I don't see a point in living in this world, one which I don't belong in, and never will.

hey, we have the same reason for wanting to ctb lol

 

[ijustwishtodie]

I'm not too sure anymore. Maybe I could be saved. But then I'd get saved in the sense that my overall ranking scale for suffering and enjoying life would be -5 as opposed to -10 or something. It's an improvement but I think I'd still be suicidal at the end of the day. Not that anybody would put in the effort to save me as it isn't their responsibility to but rather mine. All I wished was to have somebody by my side, even if it was an acquaintance, to navigate life together with. I should be doing this with my parents yet I'm not as I live in a dysfunctional family.. with my ineptitude amplifying said dysfunction

 

[EternalShore]

rofl. One person is trying his hardest to save me rn! xD but he really can't do much at all about it...
Someone could save me, yeah~ but they'd either have to be practically designed for me by God for me (which would be a wonderful contrast to everything He's given me so far) or willing to sacrifice themselves for me~

 

[UnwillingSavior]

having a gf would improve my quality of life by making me feel better about myself and less prone to depression. but that never going to happen

5 years ago I starting dating my current gf. She saved me from continuing my rough plan to ctb. Now, shes one of my biggest reasons to ctb.

She was and basically still is the perfect match for me. But, if even my perfect match can be this hurtful, annoying, ignorant, and toxic, then what the hell am I supposed to do now? And more so she has a good reason to behave this way. All people have pain and suffering, of course. But, if being with my perfect match brings this kind of confusion and pain, even if justified, I see now life is not that appealing. I'm crushed. I thought everything would be better. I was wrong.

 

[NeedAnEscape]

People have (unknowingly) tried to save me. I often lean on my friends and my boyfriend as a crutch during my worst times. While I don't tell them about my suicidality, they help me feel like a person by spending time with me. I wanted them to save me, by somehow bringing me enough happiness to make my urges disappear. But, it hasn't worked, and I doubt it ever will.

 

[MeltingBrain]

By this- I don't mean stop you during an attempt. I mean- in life generally. If someone took a real interest in your situation- and tried to help- would you welcome it? Do you think anyone could help you?

I'm not sure whether I'm going to get aggro for posting this here... but to defend the decision- I don't think this is about recovery. I think a lot of suicidal people feel abandoned or, they don't actually want people to 'help' them.

Either I imagine because they don't like being 'mothered'/nagged. They may feel like they know themselves better than anyone else could and find the inteference patronizing. Or, they may have trust issue with people if they have been let down in the past- so, don't want to rely on someone so heavily again. Or- they simply can't see what anyone could do to change their situation that they couldn't do themselves. They may feel their situation is impossible to change satisfactorily.

Personally, I lie more in the- 'I don't want anyone to try and 'save' me' camp. How about you?

Yes, I would like to get help for my medical condition from doctors or someone who knows about doctors who can help. I absolutely don't want to hear pro-life lecturing .

 

[Dr Iron Arc]

Of course I would but my selfish wants should be of no concern to anyone. Anyone foolish enough to want to save me should be held accountable and punished severely for wanting to save an irredeemable freak like me.

 

[Unattainable666]

Yes, but there is no one who will. So .....................

 

[freetrees]

I've tried to give so many signs. So many signs that I wasn't doing ok and that I was planning on killing myself. I just wanted someone to tell me, in a sincere way, that I should live. That all these ideas are in my head. That I'm wanted, heard, liked, respected. That I'm not worthless, invisible, an eyesore. But all the world does is seem to confirm my beliefs about myself. It's the world that gave me these beliefs in the first place. I guess that's why I'm here. I'm looking for a way out of this miserable life.

 

[Lavender Dreams]

The only circumstance I'd accept this in, is if they were willing to commit for the journey. If such an individual existed, showed genuine care and supported me in getting better, then the most likely outcome would be the salt sitting there until it expired by itself. In the best case scenario I'd feel secure and confident enough to dispose of it myself. My issues still have potential solutions, but I'm unable to get better without adequate support from someone in my personal life. I'm too exasperated after years of trying to recover on my own. I wouldn't be surprised if many shared a similar sentiment. That's the sad fact.

 

[funnyjoy]

all that could save me now would be a message or meet up or call with my ex so we can talk things out, but that's not happening. I've held out for a month praying and hoping, and it's just been nothing.
Now nothing can save me, and it sucks, because truthfully I don't want to go quite yet, I have so much I want to do still, but this is really the only way

 

[Celerity]

No because any change they managed to engender wouldn't last, and I would not want to see their disappointment when I inevitably slide back down again.

 

[LifeOfTheCursed]

I've got a lot of things to do, passions to pursue, comics and stories to share with people. If SOMEHOW there is someone who can help me go through the family problems, and provide me for a couple of months with a quiet place where i've got all the time i need to focus on my mental health and completely restore my connection with reality, boy i'm taking that option RIGHT AWAY

 

[leloyon]

I don't know. I guess I want someone to, but I know I'm far beyond saving at this point, so I would likely just push anyone who tried away.

 

[ceilng_tile]

I keep thinking that yes, I want to try and that yes, I want to be saved. Maybe if I make an attempt it will force the people who are destroying my life to actually listen to me and that maybe that will change things.

But honestly it would probably just make things worse, like it will reinforce all the ideas in their head about how I'm mentally unstable and can't handle responsibility and that they can't trust me to make any decisions at all. Either that or they'll feel bad for five minutes and then stop caring altogether.