More than anything I wish I never existed at all, all that's ideal to me is being permanently unaware of the futile and harmful abomination that is existence. It's extremely tragic how humans so cruelly procreate even know there is never a need for existence with nobody ever being able to suffer from never existing.
Existence itself is the true problem and is something very evil as it's the source of all suffering, under no circumstances would I ever wish to exist as a conscious being who is capable of suffering to such extreme amounts. To simply exist is beyond undesirable in every way, I'm tired of being trapped in this hellish existence where there is no limit as to how torturous it can get.
For me I only wish for true peace and only not existing can bring me that, I don't want to suffer in any way and in existence there is endless potential to suffer. I never would have wanted or chosen existence, I see it as better to not exist no matter what.