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dead lightbulb

dead lightbulb

consciousness is a curse
Oct 8, 2022
52
I've thought and thought about it but I have nothing special to say. Even if I did, I would have no one to leave it for. I've thought about leaving a letter to those who wronged me. Even then, what good would it do? I'll be dead by then. They will dismiss it as a mentally ill person's antics. Nothing I could say would matter, it wouldn't mean anything.
 
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Fulminare

Fulminare

Read Thomas Szasz!
Feb 20, 2022
227
I feel the same. I wouldn't leave anything behind for my family simply because I am not close to them and there's nothing to say.

But I think it might be wise to write down what happens to your body, belongings, etc. after you ctb. Maybe leave some money behind for a potential funeral, if you want one.

But all in all, if you've been through hell and back because of them, you shouldn't feel bad for leaving without a note. The way you move on should be most comfortable and peaceful for you.
 
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Teddybear

Teddybear

Specialist
Nov 20, 2021
335
Just make sure nobody else gets blamed for it.
 
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LaVieEnRose

LaVieEnRose

Angelic
Jul 23, 2022
4,352
If you have anyone important to you (though it sounds like you don't), you should leave something unless you talk it out beforehand (which is a tricky thing to do). It will be your final communication to them and if you don't leave anything they will always wonder.

It might be a good idea to leave a signed note testifying to the fact that it was a suicide to facilitate the work of the investigators.
 
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W

Wait-Bus

Student
Sep 20, 2022
145
I've thought and thought about it but I have nothing special to say. Even if I did, I would have no one to leave it for. I've thought about leaving a letter to those who wronged me. Even then, what good would it do? I'll be dead by then. They will dismiss it as a mentally ill person's antics. Nothing I could say would matter, it wouldn't mean anything.
I go back and forth about leaving a note. I don't think it will ever really explain what I have done. So I just think - what works best for me - and that is just a note about feeling sorry and saying no one is to blame, At the least, it will make me feel better, at least while I am still here.
 
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L

LonelyEmerald

Experienced
Nov 26, 2022
232
No.
 
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ibrandon23

ibrandon23

Member
Dec 15, 2021
11
I go back and forth. I've heard only 3 in 10 people leave a note. So if you don't? Ehh, you're in the majority.

I hope to do something short and sweet. I don't wanna come off angry. Just indifferent but assured in my decision. Don't wanna over explain, although I've had that urge sometimes once I start writing.
 
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D

Drowned Mermaid

Member
Jul 18, 2022
8
My spouse now has the instructions for making my dog's special diet, and honestly, that's the only information I think anyone really needs from me.

People who genuinely know me will not be surprised. Some, I think, may even be happy for me, and for my finally having slipped the surly bonds.

My husband will be gutted, but he'll be mourning a mental construct of me that bears only passing resemblance to the actual me, and given that he hasn't had much desire to learn who I really am during the last two decades, I see very little point in trying to educate him now.

I do have a bit of an impulse toward tidiness, so I sort of feel like leaving behind a sheet of three-ring binder paper that just says something along the lines of, "Yep, it's a suicide! Later, skaters!"* as a way of adding a piece of terminal punctuation to my life.

But I won't do that. Probably.

* Also considering: "Meep, meep! That's all, folks!" or possibly one of those folksy "Gone Fishin'" signs you find at truck stops, but with the "Fishin'" part crossed out.
 
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W

Wannagonow

Specialist
Nov 16, 2022
376
I have no intention of leaving a note. As someone above stated, very, very few people leave one. No one appears interested in how I feel now or what's going on with me. I see absolutely no reason to share anything with them after I've gone. It certainly won't be any surprise to anyone that I've finally ctb.
 
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locked*n*loaded

locked*n*loaded

Archangel
Apr 15, 2022
8,882
I'm leaving a note, but it will only contain instructions that are necessary. nothing personal directed towards anyone and no detailed explanations.
 
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W

Wunderkind

❤️Travel by bus
Nov 25, 2022
192
I recommend writing a note at least for law enforcement agencies that this is CTB and no one is to blame for this. That no one pushed you to this and it's your choice. Remember, you will leave, and someone may have problems. I will do just that.
 
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M

Malcolm Yarfa

Member
Dec 8, 2022
26
I don't plan to leave any note as I owe nothing to anyone. Certainly not to those who gave me life.
 
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FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
43,327
No, it wouldn't be wrong. I just think that with notes, it's a personal decision whether to leave one or not and only you know what is best. Leaving a note may be beneficial to some people but that is due to the circumstances that they are in.
 
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NHLTradeRumor

NHLTradeRumor

wow life sucks
Dec 13, 2022
106
I think it really depends on the person and their situation. I will leave one, but I know many people don't, so it's your choice. If you have nothing to say, then you shouldn't make a note, unless you want to anyways.
 
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Z

zeenatax

Specialist
Dec 15, 2022
313
As many others in the thread said it is up to you. But if you are really mad at those to whom you are going to leave a note in may come out as a mean act. And you are not a mean person. It doesn't have to be nice but you don't want to be mean. If you want to leave a note let it neutral. They may not be nice but there is a chance they may still love you.
 
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dead lightbulb

dead lightbulb

consciousness is a curse
Oct 8, 2022
52
As many others in the thread said it is up to you. But if you are really mad at those to whom you are going to leave a note in may come out as a mean act. And you are not a mean person. It doesn't have to be nice but you don't want to be mean. If you want to leave a note let it neutral. They may not be nice but there is a chance they may still love you.
I have drafted a simple note stating that I want all my things to be donated. I also added, in case of an investigation, that I left on my own terms and that I'm happier now.

And you're right, I don't want one of the last things I do on this earth to be with malicious intentions. ❤️
 
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A

aSilentVoice

a quiet place
Dec 8, 2022
47
I'd recommend making a (pro/)con list. I have mixed feelings about the decision.

There are a few people that I'd want to apologize to and say not to blame themselves. A note would help law enforcement in their investigation and a will would make things easier for others too.

Some methods could potentially be passed off as an accident/health issue/etc if unsuccessful. If the note was found, that would no longer be a possibility. Also, I'm a private person and worry about being judged.
 
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LaVieEnRose

LaVieEnRose

Angelic
Jul 23, 2022
4,352
I'd recommend making a (pro/)con list. I have mixed feelings about the decision.

There are a few people that I'd want to apologize to and say not to blame themselves. A note would help law enforcement in their investigation and a will would make things easier for others too.

Some methods could potentially be passed off as an accident/health issue/etc if unsuccessful. If the note was found, that would no longer be a possibility. Also, I'm a private person and worry about being judged.
There will definitely be no shortage of judgment towards you for having CTB, but if you have no control over other people's opinions while you're alive you have even less when you're dead. At least they can't cause any pain.
 
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A

aSilentVoice

a quiet place
Dec 8, 2022
47
There will definitely be no shortage of judgment towards you for having CTB, but if you have no control over other people's opinions while you're alive you have even less when you're dead. At least they can't cause any pain.
I agree that people who CTB, or attempt to, receive judgement. I didn't word what I was trying to express well and should probably go to bed soon. 😄

My 2nd paragraph is possible pros, and 3rd, is cons to writing a note. If I attempt to CTB (whether or not I survive) and write a note, that provides another thing to judge.

I used to believe in an afterlife/spirits, but lately, I'm not sure anymore. I just hope reincarnation isn't a thing. Or a densely populated hell.

Also, I like your name LaVieEnRose. 🙂
 
S

SaylorTwift

Member
Dec 16, 2022
51
No, I will not leave a note. Anyone who has known me should understand why I can't continue living. If they haven't understood me already, a note is not going to change that. If anything I have thought about leaving messages to the people who betrayed me explaining that it's their fault my life is over at age 23. I have a vengeful side and part of me want my traitors to suffer as much as possible from my death. But I want peace. I am tired of fighting people. Barely anyone will care that I die anyway. And the people who claim they care about me don't actually know me. Since my soul is already dead, I want to leave as quietly and undramatically as possible. The burial of my physical body is simply a formality.
 
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TAW122

TAW122

Emissary of the right to die.
Aug 30, 2018
7,009
I would say it is a personal decision on whether someone leaves a note for others or not. Also, the reasons would vary from individual to individual, ranging from closure, explanation, or just out of courtesy.
 
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P

purplehearted

SN re ordered! 🥲
Nov 21, 2022
116
Absolutely not. leaving a note is a personal decision. i personally was not going to leave a note bc i had nothing to say. But i decided to leave a generic courtesy note (wasnt anyones fault, was my choice, love you all etc etc) to help police officers and people move on generally and also prevent anyone from getting blamed.

ive written notes to those who have wronged me but it didnt help me feel better personally and i got rid of them. people would just think you're crazy so id advise against doing that
 
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Inferno

Inferno

Member
Jan 9, 2023
79
You don't owe anyone an explanation. If I were to write a note it would be with the intention of inflicting the most amount of guilt and suffering on those who have wronged me.
 
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sheepgirl

sheepgirl

Student
Aug 11, 2018
119
I have never left a note during my past attempts. But people are very aware of my difficulties and thoughts (mh services, family) etc. so my suicide wouldn't be a shock that I would need to leave an explanation for
 
D

Damnation

Member
Jan 17, 2023
56
I'm still indecisive about this... Honestly, I don't want to leave a note. There's no way I could ever convey how I feel and why I needed to do this, and I doubt my note would be comforting at all. The only thing I really want people to know is that it's no one's fault...

I'm afraid that my parents will think one of my friends had something to do with this and go after her or something. It makes me feel a little hopeless, because I don't trust anyone to actually listen if I leave a note saying "please don't blame anyone"
 
D

don't want it

Member
Dec 14, 2022
99
I have hate inside of me that tells me to write a note that my partner is the reason for my suicide, but I think I should be tolerant.If he was really a human being, he would feel later that he destroyed my life
 
Jred

Jred

Sadness covers me like a blanket.
Apr 26, 2022
33
I have hate inside of me that tells me to write a note that my partner is the reason for my suicide, but I think I should be tolerant.If he was really a human being, he would feel later that he destroyed my life
I have that same hate. But I know it wouldn't do anything because he's barely a human being. I think it'd hurt him more if I wrote my goodbyes to all of my loved ones and completely disregarded him.
 
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ready to go....

ready to go....

exhausted
Feb 16, 2022
80
Absolutely not, it's all down to how you personally feel.
I have written notes, but only with my wishes and instructions of things that will need tying up after I'm gone, along with a short apology and a very brief explanation.
My family and friends already know how much I'm suffering, so I don't think it will come as such a shock if I'm honest.
 
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D

don't want it

Member
Dec 14, 2022
99
I have that same hate. But I know it wouldn't do anything because he's barely a human being. I think it'd hurt him more if I wrote my goodbyes to all of my loved ones and completely disregarded him.
If he's a human, let him act like a human being, because he doesn't really care about my death
 
nonialabaster

nonialabaster

Experienced
Jan 4, 2023
263
I've thought and thought about it but I have nothing special to say. Even if I did, I would have no one to leave it for. I've thought about leaving a letter to those who wronged me. Even then, what good would it do? I'll be dead by then. They will dismiss it as a mentally ill person's antics. Nothing I could say would matter, it wouldn't mean anything.
Not a single person in my life cares a whit about me, so, no note. Don't worry about that. Do what you can, in your own time. It's your decision. Only yours. If you are still concerned about that, it's probably not time for you.
 
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