worst thing you can do is tell someone

[anyoneshorizon]

People always say to tell someone but in my experience and others, i've seen on here that is probably the worst thing you can do. It almost never helps and is just traumatic for the individual authorities get involved and you are humiliated. My whole life basically changed after i told someone. At least you learn to keep certain things to yourself. Not to mention i still wanna kill myself

 

[locked*n*loaded]

That's what I've heard, too. It hinders getting effective treatment, too, in that you can't be completely open and honest without the risk of getting locked up. What a system. Think I'll try and stay out of it and just do what I need to do.

 

[KQuotientW]

I got back from a psych ward a couple of weeks ago. Not pleasant and they exaggerated everything.

When I got to the hospital, there was a lot of sitting around. Even the paramedics were horrified that I'd been written up as dangerous, etc. I was just my usual friendly self to everyone. The paramedics told nurses and doctors that I'd been pleasant for the many hours we'd waited. When I was later placed in a cubicle (?) in the emergency department, a security guard was sitting opposite my bed. I was soon laughing and chatting with the security guards (they alternated) like normal. I don't like to hurt anyone; I don't lash out at others; and I'm even careful not to hurt other people's feelings because why ruin someone's day, even if I'm having a tough day? All paramedics and security guards said I was a lovely person and easy to get along with, to nurses and doctors, saying the report police had lodged made no sense.

I was interviewed at length by psych staff the next day. They could see I wasn't a dangerous person. All psych ward staff told the psychiatrist and registrar that I was one of their easiest patients. I was pleasant to other patients, and there were some who were definitely in the "dangerous" category, even losing their shit whilst medicated. I just didn't react to those who were going off. I spoke with other patients and staff as I normally do.

I'm pretty pissed off that in 2022, it's still not that far removed from the dark days of psychiatry. You are treated like a nothing and a no one. You have no rights. Anyone can say anything about you and anything you say can be contorted to be used against you.

Police also told them that I had imagined having a stalker for the last 9 years. Thankfully, my 2 solicitors phoned and told psych staff that I did not imagine it and that they had been in court with me a lot because of that creep. Before speaking to my solicitors, however, I was questioned about 'why (I) think (I) have a stalker?' For fuck's sake!

The second day, psych staff apologised to me and said they were mad at police for sending me. Beds were in short supply and I'd probably taken up a bed that would have been better used for someone else. I was rushed out and given a taxi voucher to get home. They all acknowledged that I wasn't a dangerous patient at all. I mostly sat in my room watching documentaries on my phone. I was nice to the staff. Police told them I had a low IQ and couldn't string an intelligent sentence together, but I was using medical terms when speaking with staff because of my previous medical studies.

It disgusts me that people are still treated so badly.

Edited to add: I'm hoping to CTB this evening, should the weather hold off so I can light charcoal outside, before bringing it inside. I don't hurt go around hurting other people. I should be allowed to choose how and when I die. My body, my choice. And, yeah, I don't tell anyone anything now.

 

[locked*n*loaded]

I got back from a psych ward a couple of weeks ago. Not pleasant and they exaggerated everything.

When I got to the hospital, there was a lot of sitting around. Even the paramedics were horrified that I'd been written up as dangerous, etc. I was just my usual friendly self to everyone. The paramedics told nurses and doctors that I'd been pleasant for the many hours we'd waited. When I was later placed in a cubicle (?) in the emergency department, a security guard was sitting opposite my bed. I was soon laughing and chatting with the security guards (they alternated) like normal. I don't like to hurt anyone; I don't lash out at others; and I'm even careful not to hurt other people's feelings because why ruin someone's day, even if I'm having a tough day? All paramedics and security guards said I was a lovely person and easy to get along with, to nurses and doctors, saying the report police had lodged made no sense.

I was interviewed at length by psych staff the next day. They could see I wasn't a dangerous person. All psych ward staff told the psychiatrist and registrar that I was one of their easiest patients. I was pleasant to other patients, and there were some who were definitely in the "dangerous" category, even losing their shit whilst medicated. I just didn't react to those who were going off. I spoke with other patients and staff as I normally do.

I'm pretty pissed off that in 2022, it's still not that far removed from the dark days of psychiatry. You are treated like a nothing and a no one. You have no rights. Anyone can say anything about you and anything you say can be contorted to be used against you.

Police also told them that I had imagined having a stalker for the last 9 years. Thankfully, my 2 solicitors phoned and told psych staff that I did not imagine it and that they had been in court with me a lot because of that creep. Before speaking to my solicitors, however, I was questioned about 'why (I) think (I) have a stalker?' For fuck's sake!

The second day, psych staff apologised to me and said they were mad at police for sending me. Beds were in short supply and I'd probably taken up a bed that would have been better used for someone else. I was rushed out and given a taxi voucher to get home. They all acknowledged that I wasn't a dangerous patient at all. I mostly sat in my room watching documentaries on my phone. I was nice to the staff. Police told them I had a low IQ and couldn't string an intelligent sentence together, but I was using medical terms when speaking with staff because of my previous medical studies.

It disgusts me that people are still treated so badly.

I don't know what anyone could say to this except.....DAMN!!!!!!!!!! What a freaking, fucked-up ordeal to have to endure. Kudos to you for exhibiting such grace in this ordeal.

 

[Living_Hurts_so_Much]

People always say to tell someone but in my experience and others, i've seen on here that is probably the worst thing you can do. It almost never helps and is just traumatic for the individual authorities get involved and you are humiliated. My whole life basically changed after i told someone. At least you learn to keep certain things to yourself. Not to mention i still wanna kill myself

I learned after a "voluntary" week in a psych ward after saying something to a Dr that it is not safe to say anything to anyone. Ending up in there. Losing my freedom and job. I search for my death in complete silence.

 

[OpheliasFlowers]

I got back from a psych ward a couple of weeks ago. Not pleasant and they exaggerated everything.

When I got to the hospital, there was a lot of sitting around. Even the paramedics were horrified that I'd been written up as dangerous, etc. I was just my usual friendly self to everyone. The paramedics told nurses and doctors that I'd been pleasant for the many hours we'd waited. When I was later placed in a cubicle (?) in the emergency department, a security guard was sitting opposite my bed. I was soon laughing and chatting with the security guards (they alternated) like normal. I don't like to hurt anyone; I don't lash out at others; and I'm even careful not to hurt other people's feelings because why ruin someone's day, even if I'm having a tough day? All paramedics and security guards said I was a lovely person and easy to get along with, to nurses and doctors, saying the report police had lodged made no sense.

I was interviewed at length by psych staff the next day. They could see I wasn't a dangerous person. All psych ward staff told the psychiatrist and registrar that I was one of their easiest patients. I was pleasant to other patients, and there were some who were definitely in the "dangerous" category, even losing their shit whilst medicated. I just didn't react to those who were going off. I spoke with other patients and staff as I normally do.

I'm pretty pissed off that in 2022, it's still not that far removed from the dark days of psychiatry. You are treated like a nothing and a no one. You have no rights. Anyone can say anything about you and anything you say can be contorted to be used against you.

Police also told them that I had imagined having a stalker for the last 9 years. Thankfully, my 2 solicitors phoned and told psych staff that I did not imagine it and that they had been in court with me a lot because of that creep. Before speaking to my solicitors, however, I was questioned about 'why (I) think (I) have a stalker?' For fuck's sake!

The second day, psych staff apologised to me and said they were mad at police for sending me. Beds were in short supply and I'd probably taken up a bed that would have been better used for someone else. I was rushed out and given a taxi voucher to get home. They all acknowledged that I wasn't a dangerous patient at all. I mostly sat in my room watching documentaries on my phone. I was nice to the staff. Police told them I had a low IQ and couldn't string an intelligent sentence together, but I was using medical terms when speaking with staff because of my previous medical studies.

It disgusts me that people are still treated so badly.

Edited to add: I'm hoping to CTB this evening, should the weather hold off so I can light charcoal outside, before bringing it inside. I don't hurt go around hurting other people. I should be allowed to choose how and when I die. My body, my choice. And, yeah, I don't tell anyone anything now.

I am so sorry you went through what you did. I hate how the "professionals" constantly preach about 'reaching out and telling someone' or 'talking to someone', and publicize hotlines to 'help' when really all it turns out to be is entrapment, and they DO indeed twist and contort your own words against you (I've definitely had that done to me by doctors and therapists, etc). It's a horrible place to be to be terrified of asking for help or trying to find relief from your suffering (and that goes for physical ailments, as well - ESPECIALLY if you also have a history of mental health issues because everything gets blamed on that).

And I find it hilariously ridiculous and maddening that the police would try to claim you have a low IQ and not be able to string an intelligent sentence together because WTF? You are clearly an intelligent and articulate person; your very well written post and how well you express your thoughts proves that!

Again, I'm very sorry you went through that experience at the hospital and were treated the way you were. You handled everything with dignity and calm, something I know I'd not be able to do.

Much love to you

 

[Living_Hurts_so_Much]

I am so sorry you went through what you did. I hate how the "professionals" constantly preach about 'reaching out and telling someone' or 'talking to someone', and publicize hotlines to 'help' when really all it turns out to be is entrapment, and they DO indeed twist and contort your own words against you (I've definitely had that done to me by doctors and therapists, etc). It's a horrible place to be to be terrified of asking for help or trying to find relief from your suffering (and that goes for physical ailments, as well - ESPECIALLY if you also have a history of mental health issues because everything gets blamed on that).

And I find it hilariously ridiculous and maddening that the police would try to claim you have a low IQ and not be able to string an intelligent sentence together because WTF? You are clearly an intelligent and articulate person; your very well written post and how well you express your thoughts proves that!

Again, I'm very sorry you went through that experience at the hospital and were treated the way you were. You handled everything with dignity and calm, something I know I'd not be able to do.

Much love to you

And being kept "safe" by being locked away and drugged up so you can't hurt yourself is a fate far worse than death.

 

[makethepainstop]

People always say to tell someone but in my experience and others, i've seen on here that is probably the worst thing you can do. It almost never helps and is just traumatic for the individual authorities get involved and you are humiliated. My whole life basically changed after i told someone. At least you learn to keep certain things to yourself. Not to mention i still wanna kill myself

The X-FILES had it right, "Trust no one!"

 

[Hope:-)]

I'm literally not going to tell anyone but you guys. This has to work this time. X

 

[ojinzo]

No human I've told other than on this site had ever supported my decision/ made me not feel crazy.

 

[Littlewittlelight]

@Hope:-) and @ojinzo if anyone of you want to talk or vent in the meantime I am also here. I hope you don't feel alone because I recently came across your plans. I hope you don't feel alone and thankfully we can share as much as we want here.

 

[Hope:-)]

@Hope:-) and @ojinzo if anyone of you want to talk or vent in the meantime I am also here. I hope you don't feel alone because I recently came across your plans. I hope you don't feel alone and thankfully we can share as much as we want here.

Ahhh that's very sweet

 

[emgrl]

I just text a help hotline, would never mention CTB, just feeling really anxious. This was one of their responses:

"We know you've been dealing with a lot lately. We want to give you the tools you need in order to be able to better support yourself. Our goal is to support you through a crisis. So, we'll be here for you, but we're going to keep our convos to 45 mins, every 48 hrs."

So, they'll only give me 45 minutes of their time, and then I can't bother them again for another 48 hours. What a joke.

Edit: I'm still waiting for a real person to reply back to me…

Updated automated text reply:

"Hey, you're still in line for a human Crisis Counselor. If you're in immediate danger, call 911 for help. Text STOP to end this convo for now."

 

[Littlewittlelight]

Ahhh that's very sweet

I need to be because if I ask someone would surely want to be there for me when I need them so that's the least I should do. Now I look at private wall whenever I come on site so why not?

 

[thereisthemist]

"some secrets are made to be told, some sayings are made to be secrets"

 

[freedompass]

I got back from a psych ward a couple of weeks ago. Not pleasant and they exaggerated everything.

When I got to the hospital, there was a lot of sitting around. Even the paramedics were horrified that I'd been written up as dangerous, etc. I was just my usual friendly self to everyone. The paramedics told nurses and doctors that I'd been pleasant for the many hours we'd waited. When I was later placed in a cubicle (?) in the emergency department, a security guard was sitting opposite my bed. I was soon laughing and chatting with the security guards (they alternated) like normal. I don't like to hurt anyone; I don't lash out at others; and I'm even careful not to hurt other people's feelings because why ruin someone's day, even if I'm having a tough day? All paramedics and security guards said I was a lovely person and easy to get along with, to nurses and doctors, saying the report police had lodged made no sense.

I was interviewed at length by psych staff the next day. They could see I wasn't a dangerous person. All psych ward staff told the psychiatrist and registrar that I was one of their easiest patients. I was pleasant to other patients, and there were some who were definitely in the "dangerous" category, even losing their shit whilst medicated. I just didn't react to those who were going off. I spoke with other patients and staff as I normally do.

I'm pretty pissed off that in 2022, it's still not that far removed from the dark days of psychiatry. You are treated like a nothing and a no one. You have no rights. Anyone can say anything about you and anything you say can be contorted to be used against you.

Police also told them that I had imagined having a stalker for the last 9 years. Thankfully, my 2 solicitors phoned and told psych staff that I did not imagine it and that they had been in court with me a lot because of that creep. Before speaking to my solicitors, however, I was questioned about 'why (I) think (I) have a stalker?' For fuck's sake!

The second day, psych staff apologised to me and said they were mad at police for sending me. Beds were in short supply and I'd probably taken up a bed that would have been better used for someone else. I was rushed out and given a taxi voucher to get home. They all acknowledged that I wasn't a dangerous patient at all. I mostly sat in my room watching documentaries on my phone. I was nice to the staff. Police told them I had a low IQ and couldn't string an intelligent sentence together, but I was using medical terms when speaking with staff because of my previous medical studies.

It disgusts me that people are still treated so badly.

Edited to add: I'm hoping to CTB this evening, should the weather hold off so I can light charcoal outside, before bringing it inside. I don't hurt go around hurting other people. I should be allowed to choose how and when I die. My body, my choice. And, yeah, I don't tell anyone anything now.

Interesting story, I had a similar experience last year, tho because of a malicious accusation by a passer by not anything about ctb. Here in the UK the last thing psych ward staff want or need is being sent a patient who doesn't need to be there. I was angry with the police too, and also the first psych who interviewed me resulting in an unwanted and unnecessary 3 day stay.

 

[FuneralCry]

I agree that it's always a bad idea to tell people about wanting to ctb. After all we live in a world where suicide is so stigmatised. Telling people will definitely just make things worse. In an ideal world there would be no secrecy surrounding suicide and we could be open about our plans with others respecting our decision. The problem is this pro suffering society that wants to force people to live against their wishes until they reach old age.