Work Hard So You Can Afford to Pay for This - Sad Future - Best I Could do For A "Respectful" Title

[TheBroken]

Sick, dying and raped in America's nursing homes

Some of the victims can't speak. They rely on walkers and wheelchairs to leave their beds. They have been robbed of their memories. They come to nursing homes to be cared for.

www.cnn.com

More than half of adults over 50 would rather die than do this

Older adults would rather die than reside in a nursing care facility, Nationwide Retirement Institute found. Even worse, they find long-term care expenses terrifying. The annual cost of a private room in a nursing home is now $102,200, according to Genworth Financial.

www.cnbc.com

 

[Little_Suzy]

This was posted in the Suicide Discussion section….. for what reason?

In addition to a "SA trigger warning," a respectful title concerning the sexual assault of an elderly woman would be greatly appreciated.

Using this woman's suffering to complain about "living" is callous.

 

[donsie]

This was posted in the Suicide Discussion section….. for what reason?

In addition to a "SA trigger warning," a respectful title concerning the sexual assault of an elderly woman would be greatly appreciated.

Using this woman's suffering to complain about "living" is callous.

Thank you for speaking on this. I would like to agree with you. I was not expecting this.

 

[TheBroken]

Too real for ya? So let me understand this fully .... an article title stating "more than half of adults over 50 would rather die than do this" doesn't belong in the suicide forum? Huh ... that's interesting. Members troll and respond with hearts to the last words, posts, and ropes/SN photos of many who are just about to end their lives, but no one complains that they didn't get a "trigger warning"? Huh, that's interesting. Hundreds of posts are made where members list a host of gore and life pain articles/stories and reasons why they aren't looking forward to life, but a post doing the same thing is not "respectful"? Huh .... that's interesting. Exactly what is the measuring stick here? I'm really confused.

 

[Forever Sleep]

Yeah. I worked for a while in a relatively good nursing home. It isn't just the situation these poor people are in, it's the atrocities our own bodies put us through. Incontinence and dementia are awful. These people were being treated with the utmost care and respect but ultimately- if your mind doesn't understand what's going on and, no amount of explaining will help- it must be a terrifying experience.

Some would actually fight you when you're trying to help them. It's awful and undignified. It's disgusting that we don't allow people who would rather be at peace go before they get to a stage where life is like that. Most were on a 'Do Not Resuscitate' order. That should say something! By no means all but some had definitely had enough. They should be allowed to pass peacefully.

As for abuse- I was terrified I might witness it but, luckily I didn't. The staff there were angels. It utterly horrifies me that it goes on but it doesn't surprise me- people like that will look for roles where there are vulnerable people. They do run stringent police checks but I guess- if you don't have a record... I dread to think what it's like in some of the council run facilities. I don't want to find out! There's no way I could afford somewhere half way ok when I'm old. I want out way before that stage.

 

[carac]

This seems more like doom scrolling to me. Yes there are a lot of old people abandoned and in very bad situations. Have you thought about experiencing it yourself though, maybe find a volunteering oppurtunity where you can help the elderly, talk to them get to know the bigger picture. Many are cared for and loved and quite happy

 

[Celerity]

Too real for ya? So let me understand this fully .... an article title stating "more than half of adults over 50 would rather die than do this" doesn't belong in the suicide forum? Huh ... that's interesting. Members troll and respond with hearts to the last words, posts, and ropes/SN photos of many who are just about to end their lives, but no one complains that they didn't get a "trigger warning"? Huh, that's interesting. Hundreds of posts are made where members list a host of gore and life pain articles/stories and reasons why they aren't looking forward to life, but a post doing the same thing is not "respectful"? Huh .... that's interesting. Exactly what is the measuring stick here? I'm really confused.

I feel like you're being dog-piled, OP. I don't understand everybody's beef with you. You make a very valid point. My grandmother was one of the lucky ones. She got to spend the last years of her life in the comfort of her home. I still wouldn't wish the slow slide into becoming an invalid on anyone.

The state of nursing homes in the US is disgusting. I suspect it is also shit elsewhere, but I can only speak to the American perspective since that's what I know. When I worked in the ER as a scribe, I saw a ton of neglect and abuse firsthand. Families would show up out of the blue when grandma was on death's door like lapsed Catholics do attending mass on Easter and Christmas. Most nursing homes are depressing places that are better described as warehouses of the dying. You have to either be really lucky with location or shell out the big bucks to find decent accommodations.

Since popular culture likes to talk about the "golden years" and so many people bust their ass at thankless jobs hoping to have a happy retirement, it's worth questioning if such an end goal is worth it. What makes life worth living? Everybody has a different answer, but I think we can all admit it isn't this.

 

[TheBroken]

This seems more like doom scrolling to me. Yes there are a lot of old people abandoned and in very bad situations. Have you thought about experiencing it yourself though, maybe find a volunteering oppurtunity where you can help the elderly, talk to them get to know the bigger picture. Many are cared for and loved and quite happy

A good point.

I feel like you're being dog-piled, OP. I don't understand everybody's beef with you. You make a very valid point. My grandmother was one of the lucky ones. She got to spend the last years of her life in the comfort of her home. I still wouldn't wish the slow slide into becoming an invalid on anyone.

The state of nursing homes in the US is disgusting. I suspect it is also shit elsewhere, but I can only speak to the American perspective since that's what I know. When I worked in the ER as a scribe, I saw a ton of neglect and abuse firsthand. Families would show up out of the blue when grandma was on death's door like lapsed Catholics do attending mass on Easter and Christmas. Most nursing homes are depressing places that are better described as warehouses of the dying. You have to either be really lucky with location or shell out the big bucks to find decent accommodations.

Since popular culture likes to talk about the "golden years" and so many people bust their ass at thankless jobs hoping to have a happy retirement, it's worth questioning if such an end goal is worth it. What makes life worth living? Everybody has a different answer, but I think we can all admit it isn't this.

Good points. Bottom line, touch to work so hard only to end up in a terrible situation unless, like you said, one can pay good money. CUrrent generic places in U.S. are $70,000+ and good ones $150,000 + a year. How exactly will the next generation pay ..... not.