witnessed a suicide today

[kittyswift]

unfortunately i do not drive (i have just never had the time to learn) and so i rely on public transport. while waiting for a train today i witnessed someone intentionally jump in-front of the train. however, it is being reported in my local news outlets that it was accidental. im so in shock? part of me is jealous of their bravery but im also so shocked and upset at how horribly brutal it was. i found out later that he died on the scene. it made me feel nauseous just witnessing it and i cant ever imagine actually going through with this method myself. to people who are thinking about this method, how do you think you will overcome si? im also interested to hear about if anyone else has witnessed something like this

 

[Deleted member 65988]

That must've been traumatizing to witness someone take the plunge to ctb in public, personally one of the reasons I've never opted for a ctb in public. The will to overcome si with not just this method but any is a great deal of will power and also reaching a total point of indifference to continue on. That person must've been in great pain to no longer to worry about si or the potential of failure.

 

[MrBigSad]

Ctb by public transport is out of the question for me, for the reason it causes so much trauma. The trauma to your family and friends is enough but trauma to strangers too? I'm sorry you had to witness it.

 

[SecretDissociation]

What a sad thing to witness I'm sorry you were there. If it is still fresh in your mind, would you play tetris? It helps with reformulating traumatic memories and could help you short while.

I've stopped myself from walking in front of traffic and moments before that I had no SI because I was just miserable. The world looked so dark and I didn't feel in existence. I'd have to be in that dark dark place again to feel this way. I dont think I will ever plan something like this. It would have to be almost spontaneous.

 

[Slow_Farewell]

i considered the method but it was waaaay wayyyy back before I looked into sites like Sasu.
I dont think i'd go through with it, same as the other replies posted here, but its..more like..I dont want to inflict trauma on the people that would scrape me off the train tracks & the train driver (if there was one), not for the people who'd see me jump.

PS- Ramona Flowers, is that you? lol.

 

[leavingthesoultrap]

I don't drive either. I had my train delayed couple of times due to suicide but I never witnessed that in person

 

[theboy]

I did not witness it but I did feel the impact of the train.

 

[kittyswift]

What a sad thing to witness I'm sorry you were there. If it is still fresh in your mind, would you play tetris? It helps with reformulating traumatic memories and could help you short while.

I've stopped myself from walking in front of traffic and moments before that I had no SI because I was just miserable. The world looked so dark and I didn't feel in existence. I'd have to be in that dark dark place again to feel this way. I dont think I will ever plan something like this. It would have to be almost spontaneous.

ooh thats a good idea, thank you i will try that

i considered the method but it was waaaay wayyyy back before I looked into sites like Sasu.
I dont think i'd go through with it, same as the other replies posted here, but its..more like..I dont want to inflict trauma on the people that would scrape me off the train tracks & the train driver (if there was one), not for the people who'd see me jump.

PS- Ramona Flowers, is that you? lol.

yess! i also have blue hair so i thought it was fitting

 

[voidstar]

Last year I actually became witness to two suicides - it was equally haunting but also intriguing.
The first one was a guy jumping to his death from the 7th floor of the building I was living in back then, he was dead once he reached the ground but he managed to catch on some railing or something on his way down. Can't imagine that being painless.
And the other guy cut his arteries on both his upper legs, he was a neighbor of mine and I found him. He left behind a poor little kitten that thankfully got a good new home. This one hit me harder seen as he was also a friend but I have mixed feelings about both.
Oh and blue hair gang unite

 

[Worndown]

Jumping and trains are rather public events. Others get brought into the scene.
Best to investigate more private methods.

 

[Kit1]

unfortunately i do not drive (i have just never had the time to learn) and so i rely on public transport. while waiting for a train today i witnessed someone intentionally jump in-front of the train. however, it is being reported in my local news outlets that it was accidental. im so in shock? part of me is jealous of their bravery but im also so shocked and upset at how horribly brutal it was. i found out later that he died on the scene. it made me feel nauseous just witnessing it and i cant ever imagine actually going through with this method myself. to people who are thinking about this method, how do you think you will overcome si? im also interested to hear about if anyone else has witnessed something like this

I am so sorry that you witnessed someone jumping in front of the train. I was about 14 years old and had been discharged from hospital after taking two consecutive overdoses. Returned to school and was waiting for the traing on the underground platform d there were a number of my classmates waiting for the train. I saw this man and for some reason, I was watching him carefully and knew something was wrong though it all happened quickly. As the train was moving in, he jumped - we had looked at each other for a few seconds before hand and I can still remember his eyes (and this is after 30+ years). Anyway he jumped and I can still hear classmates screaming and people running around and it was chaotic. I couldn't talk - literally I stopped talking for the next few hours. All the school children were taken back to school as a group and I later heard that one of the teachers had commented that she thought I had jumped in front of the train. I don't know whether he died.

Now I sometimes go to a particular location and sit and watch the trains go past and they are fast - overland trains and often I have thought about whether I should go for it, but I am pretty sure that I wouldn't even in a dissociative state as that experience is just as painful now as it was then. I would not subject a train driver or anyone else to that.

 

[BoxOfThoughts]

I am so sorry that you witnessed someone jumping in front of the train. I was about 14 years old and had been discharged from hospital after taking two consecutive overdoses. Returned to school and was waiting for the traing on the underground platform d there were a number of my classmates waiting for the train. I saw this man and for some reason, I was watching him carefully and knew something was wrong though it all happened quickly. As the train was moving in, he jumped - we had looked at each other for a few seconds before hand and I can still remember his eyes (and this is after 30+ years). Anyway he jumped and I can still hear classmates screaming and people running around and it was chaotic. I couldn't talk - literally I stopped talking for the next few hours. All the school children were taken back to school as a group and I later heard that one of the teachers had commented that she thought I had jumped in front of the train. I don't know whether he died.

Now I sometimes go to a particular location and sit and watch the trains go past and they are fast - overland trains and often I have thought about whether I should go for it, but I am pretty sure that I wouldn't even in a dissociative state as that experience is just as painful now as it was then. I would not subject a train driver or anyone else to that.

I'm terribly sorry that happened to you, I can only imagine the horrors witnessing something like that would have on such a young mind.

 

[penguinl0v3s]

People tend to take substances to reduce SI with violent methods.

 

[DesperateOne]

unfortunately i do not drive (i have just never had the time to learn) and so i rely on public transport. while waiting for a train today i witnessed someone intentionally jump in-front of the train. however, it is being reported in my local news outlets that it was accidental. im so in shock? part of me is jealous of their bravery but im also so shocked and upset at how horribly brutal it was. i found out later that he died on the scene. it made me feel nauseous just witnessing it and i cant ever imagine actually going through with this method myself. to people who are thinking about this method, how do you think you will overcome si? im also interested to hear about if anyone else has witnessed something like this

The amount of courage one has to have to do this in public is astounding to me... There are so many factors that could go wrong when doing that, but they decided to take the plunge anyways. I personally always wanted a method that is not as brutal and that raises your dopamine meanwhile slowly drifts you to permanent sleep. Sadly such a method doesn't exist apart from N maybe?

 

[GMOpNsOTW9J]

The first one was a guy jumping to his death from the 7th floor of the building I was living in back then, he was dead once he reached the ground but he managed to catch on some railing or something on his way down.

Do you think he had regrets? That scares me.

 

[voidstar]

Do you think he had regrets? That scares me.

I happened to watch the whole thing and at least to me it didn't appear like he did. But I'm pretty sure he didn't intend to scrape/hit the side of the building so there's that.
He looked oddly content and at peace.

 

[UKscotty]

Someone jumping under a train is something that happens about every few days here in the underground. I think people here are desensitised to it as its so common.

 

[Raindancer]

I am really sorry you had to see that. I cannot even imagine. I guess you get to the point where the pain of being here is so bad that one more second is too much. I too would not want anyone to have to deal with the consequences. For some who would witness this the trauma will be with them forever.

 

[No_Lxve]

unfortunately i do not drive (i have just never had the time to learn) and so i rely on public transport. while waiting for a train today i witnessed someone intentionally jump in-front of the train. however, it is being reported in my local news outlets that it was accidental. im so in shock? part of me is jealous of their bravery but im also so shocked and upset at how horribly brutal it was. i found out later that he died on the scene. it made me feel nauseous just witnessing it and i cant ever imagine actually going through with this method myself. to people who are thinking about this method, how do you think you will overcome si? im also interested to hear about if anyone else has witnessed something like this

i have also witnessed a suicide by train, except i actually saw the person before they fell in the tracks. i made a post about it if you want to check it out. its similar to yours. im sorry you had to see such a thing. it is shocking. hope youre doing well. much love.