Hello.
I sometimes think about really stupid ways to die. This tickles my sense of humour, as well as satisfying my apparent need for suicidal ideation.
This sort of mental trickery kept me alive for a long time.
There was an old website once that said things like 'headbutt the pavement from a standing position'. Although it's surely a dated 'Cracked.com' style from a probably questionable individual, I'm grateful to the writer, who distracted me from my thoughts without minimising them. If anyone knows it or can be bothered to find it, go ahead and post the link.
Anyway, I wanted to share a couple of stupid methods here, and I invite you to share any stupid suicideas
that you might have or have come across.
I hope that humour can save some lives in cases where a person doesn't need to go, or give comfort or amusement in cases where a person does need to go.
---
The first really stupid method I've often thought about is a bungee-cord hanging, in front of a train tunnel just before a train emerges. Fairly certain death, possibility of some strange physics to be displayed. Some sort of net might be required to keep the parts together after impact.
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The second stupid method, which I've been thinking about more recently, is hanging myself from the moving arm of a power windmill. This presents several mysteries.
How to attach oneself/the rope to the windmill arm? I thought a drone covered in extremely strong fast-acting glue might work, or some sort of welding. Would have to be very fast bonding, and expert piloting.
Even assuming no stretch on the rope, I'd have to be elevated to start with, so that my corpse is not whacked on the floor with every turn.
Would the weight of my body affect the windmill blades much? Probably not, I guess.
Would I be spun into the sky as the rope is pulled taut? Or just lifted up and banged into the axle of the blades?
I don't know, and I wish I did.
Anyway, happy to discuss these or any other stupid suicide ideas
---
Might as well add. I once read of a tribe (in Africa?) who would execute people by beheading. Except, they would bend a tree down to the ground, place the person's head on it, and use the stored spring energy of the tree to catapult the head into the sky at the moment of beheading. I always thought that was kind of cool (given that heads are supposed to stay alive a while once severed) and wondered about building a guillotine/catapult combo to achieve it.
There's also a film called Taxidermia, I think, where someone builds a machine to kill himself and automatically carry out (or rather, finish his already-begun) taxidermy on his body. Gross, but fits the theme
I sometimes think about really stupid ways to die. This tickles my sense of humour, as well as satisfying my apparent need for suicidal ideation.
This sort of mental trickery kept me alive for a long time.
There was an old website once that said things like 'headbutt the pavement from a standing position'. Although it's surely a dated 'Cracked.com' style from a probably questionable individual, I'm grateful to the writer, who distracted me from my thoughts without minimising them. If anyone knows it or can be bothered to find it, go ahead and post the link.
Anyway, I wanted to share a couple of stupid methods here, and I invite you to share any stupid suicideas
that you might have or have come across.I hope that humour can save some lives in cases where a person doesn't need to go, or give comfort or amusement in cases where a person does need to go.
---
The first really stupid method I've often thought about is a bungee-cord hanging, in front of a train tunnel just before a train emerges. Fairly certain death, possibility of some strange physics to be displayed. Some sort of net might be required to keep the parts together after impact.
---
The second stupid method, which I've been thinking about more recently, is hanging myself from the moving arm of a power windmill. This presents several mysteries.
How to attach oneself/the rope to the windmill arm? I thought a drone covered in extremely strong fast-acting glue might work, or some sort of welding. Would have to be very fast bonding, and expert piloting.
Even assuming no stretch on the rope, I'd have to be elevated to start with, so that my corpse is not whacked on the floor with every turn.
Would the weight of my body affect the windmill blades much? Probably not, I guess.
Would I be spun into the sky as the rope is pulled taut? Or just lifted up and banged into the axle of the blades?
I don't know, and I wish I did.
Anyway, happy to discuss these or any other stupid suicide ideas
---
Might as well add. I once read of a tribe (in Africa?) who would execute people by beheading. Except, they would bend a tree down to the ground, place the person's head on it, and use the stored spring energy of the tree to catapult the head into the sky at the moment of beheading. I always thought that was kind of cool (given that heads are supposed to stay alive a while once severed) and wondered about building a guillotine/catapult combo to achieve it.
There's also a film called Taxidermia, I think, where someone builds a machine to kill himself and automatically carry out (or rather, finish his already-begun) taxidermy on his body. Gross, but fits the theme
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