wish suicide less scary

[sevennn]

suicide = awful. scary. wish euthanasia, assisted suicide. very scared. extremely. have panic attacks. suicide planning. feel terrified. how to accept. how to go through. HAVE TO. so how. very very scared. wish was like you. many here who commit. how?? if lived alone then easier. would do it. easier. going hotel unfamiliar. even more scared. no peace on mind. hard. don't understand. feel so small and childish. have to do this. help me accept. so scared. wish could drink SN in room. felt more comfortable. no? wish family left. hotel unfamiliar. agoraphobia. no strength go outside. scared people. new places. wish could die in own room. my things. my toys. my stuff. my plushy. my everything. one little room. my life. isolated. my prison. wish could die in my prison. don't want to escape my prison. suicide sucks. don't want suicide. want death. over. have to go put money on card > purchase all needed SN, stuff, pill, hotel. scared. miss mom. sorry mom. tinnitus robbed life. beat down. insignificant life. stupid person. curl up. die. alone. deserve. misfortune. don't know what did. never liked by god. never destine to be happy. can't hurt even tinnitus take all focus. but hurt that now life over. mean know what happened and know what never will. and know. never destined be happy. never destined one dream come true. now mystery over. now know. if could hurt then would. try everyday for mom. try hard. believe treatment. hard believe. inner ear. fragile. anything worsen. forever. fragile. want hand held when die. now life over mystery solved. question answered. no one ever love me now. like wanted. no dream come true like wanted. no first kiss. touch love career friend adult all only childish dream. never destined. now know. now time to cry. and die. tomorrow put money on card. tomorrow buy SN. soon goodbye. maybe easier than think. anxiety. the end always easier then think. now. did exposure therapy now all in laughable past. sorry sweetie. die now. i tried. we tried. tried. tinnitus murdered me

 

[ijustwishtodie]

I also wish that suicide was less scary. I unfortunately can't access SN so I'd have to rely on a more brutal method such as drowning. It really is scary and I loathe humans for regulating death so much to where the only suicide methods available are the painful and risky ones. Humans have the technology and intelligence to craft peaceful suicide methods yet they'll never do so because they want slaves. I hate humans so much and I hate being trapped in existence

 

[sevennn]

I also wish that suicide was less scary. I unfortunately can't access SN so I'd have to rely on a more brutal method such as drowning. It really is scary and I loathe humans for regulating death so much to where the only suicide methods available are the painful and risky ones. Humans have the technology and intelligence to craft peaceful suicide methods yet they'll never do so because they want slaves. I hate humans so much and I hate being trapped in existence

doctor advocate for euthanasia said "lets not hold people hostage to life's failures" feel that quote in heart. she = right. drowning? maybe can make peaceful? somehow? i thought initially drownings wantdd to go to lake and take drug in water that makes pass out and die. but found no drug. some say nangs/duster but say also that wake up quickly. confused.

 

[Alexandra0]

Tinnitus (4 degrees) is the worst thing in my life. This is simply impossible for a living creature to tolerate! I plan to just shoot myself and then he will finally leave me alone.
Only Death can break this vicious circle, only Death can cure my illness, period.

 

[sevennn]

Tinnitus (4 degrees) is the worst thing in my life. This is simply impossible for a living creature to tolerate! I plan to just shoot myself and then he will finally leave me alone.
Only Death can break this vicious circle, only Death can cure my illness, period.

sadly bbbecause right now only cure is death. sad. do you have gun?

 

[ijustwishtodie]

doctor advocate for euthanasia said "lets not hold people hostage to life's failures" feel that quote in heart. she = right. drowning? maybe can make peaceful? somehow? i thought initially drownings wantdd to go to lake and take drug in water that makes pass out and die. but found no drug. some say nangs/duster but say also that wake up quickly. confused.

Unfortunately I can't access drugs either

 

[Thisisme373]

I also wish suicide wasn't so scary & I wish assisted suicide was legal

 

[sevennn]

Unfortunately I can't access drugs either

sorry. shallow water method? drowning very scary sorry your method so scary. hugs love

 

[ijustwishtodie]

sorry. shallow water method? drowning very scary sorry your method so scary. hugs love

I've heard of shallow water blackout but I don't know if it'll work or not. I'm also too scared to try and attempt it in the first place

 

[sevennn]

I've heard of shallow water blackout but I don't know if it'll work or not. I'm also too scared to try and attempt it in the first place

heard hard to achieve. but if i had pool i would try many time. most peaceful death that can be. maybe even fun too. cus. just swimming. holding breath. swimming can be fun. then black out. if i was rich = had pool. then would try it. sorry you r suffering

Tinnitus (4 degrees) is the worst thing in my life. This is simply impossible for a living creature to tolerate! I plan to just shoot myself and then he will finally leave me alone.
Only Death can break this vicious circle, only Death can cure my illness, period.

want to say again. your words comforting. because everyone downplay tinnitus suffering. makes me feel valid in suicide to hear your words.

 

[complex]

I work in ENT and see how destructive TI can be and debilitating it can be. There is ways to lessen to a level but none completely eradicate it if severe enough. The heart beat pounding or high pitch squealing or buzz buzz and more its hell the body can do this and ..... All I will say is i know and have seen ur suffering in many and a support group of others suffering can help validate and help?!?

 

[Defenestration]

désolé. méthode en eau peu profonde ? noyade très effrayante désolé, ta méthode est si effrayante. câlins amour

This IS the most frightening method

 

[sevennn]

I work in ENT and see how destructive TI can be and debilitating it can be. There is ways to lessen to a level but none completely eradicate it if severe enough. The heart beat pounding or high pitch squealing or buzz buzz and more its hell the body can do this and ..... All I will say is i know and have seen ur suffering in many and a support group of others suffering can help validate and help?!?

:,((( used to be ok 10 years then flight with cold, ETD then i think ibuprofen when on period (4 pills in two days. 400 mg) now reactive tinnitus. louder, new hissing noise, fullness sensation. still clicking ears and think TMj now. because all chewing yawning crying - sound. maybe muscles/skeleton problem. original noise induced from concert. now hard to concentrate on some sound. fear deaf in minor way? don't know. i take muscle relaxant. some vitamin. mom got me massage. no more help. nothing at all :,( my fault. favourite sounds reactive now. prisoner at home now. but recently flushing toilet and washing hands and shower not hurt anymore. so maybe better? lost weight can't think. can't type. brain fried!! twitched and panic attacks. hopeless. sorry to put history on you. just doctors never hear me. why no cure yet? why nobody care? it's such a big problem. why nobody advocated or cares? why nothing. doesn't doctors know it's killing patient? burden on life. why no awareness. why never told concert = tinnitus. why never told headphone = tinnitus. why every medication bad for ears. cant take pain relief. antidepressant. anti anxiety. nothing. all ear poison. now small world. can't leave house. why doctors no empathy or help or research or advocate. nothing. why gaslight with therapy. got at 15 googled online internet said no cure. cried. now 25 terminal tinnitus. not fair. other young people live life. i'm crippled with small problem. nobody care about. tinnitus groups most depressing place. because everyone bitter angry hurting. lives destroyed. some homeless. not fair nobody care for us like we are discarded worthless
im sorry for long reply. don't have to read