Will your death by suicide be a suprise

[hmnow]

It will absolutely be the case; no one will expect it because I am considered so balanced. They just don't seen what I feel inside me. Ever since I have been a teenager, I have carried the knowledge that I will die by suicide. Its now getting closer and tie will be here soon

 

[L9my]

I imagine it will be.

 

[tretion]

it shouldnt be, ive told my mom i was suicidal but she just laughed so idk maybe it will be

 

[InTheAbyss]

Probably. A few people know that I've applied for MAID. Doubt that they've worked out that I'm planning to ctb soon cause it's not working out like I hoped. No one else really has a clue.

 

[4Icarus]

To most, yeah. Prior trauma w/ psychiatry meant I had to be very, very good at hiding in plain sight.
Only a couple people know it's on the table for me. At least, those who know me now, I bet I have a trail of people from where I just left placing bets on whether I'd drink myself to death or let myself get hit by a car first. Sometimes if I found them again in one of my usual bars after a month of being out of commission, they'd mention they thought I'd finally done it. Since I'd been suddenly displaced from my home then, maybe they think I'm dead right now?

My siblings don't know. My friends abroad might have a hunch. I'm aware it will be devastating for them if it happens too soon. I'm trying to hold on so I can simply pretend I simply vanished again if/when it gets to that point.

 

[Forever Sleep]

Probably to some. Not to others. Some know I've had ideation since childhood although, it may still come as a shock that I actually did it. (Assuming I do.)

 

[femcelloser]

I dunno actually! They know I've attempted once before. I survived and my mom like found me. But like they've literally never brought it up to me and now it's like a thing we don't talk about. I don't know if she'll be surprised or if she had to of known

 

[unluckysadness]

Yes and no. Most people know I'm suffering

 

[kunikuzushi]

To my two closest friends and boyfriend, it will not be a surprise because I'm always talking about suicide and how I'm at my limit. To everyone else, they'll be very surprised because I hide my suffering very well and am always energetic, lively, and laughing.

 

[tercermundista]

I don't think so because it's so obvious that my life was going to end like this, but my family is so stupid and so good at denying reality, that it might take them by surprise.

 

[logen9inefingers]

yeah, i think it would surprise everyone. i'm always lively and energetic with everyone, i don't think anyone around me has any idea how much i suffer.

 

[catstermaster]

I've hinted that I attempted before, but I don't think my family grasps the concept of depression and suicide at all. They probably think I'm the most well adjusted person. They're good people, just fucking pressured me my whole life to join the family business or get a good job to support them due to the culture in our country. Probably the main reason why I'm ctb'ing, I can't deal with 3-5 more years of exams and internships (MANDATORY INTERNSHIPS WHERE THEY MAKE YOU WORK LIKE A SLAVE FOR 12 HOURS A DAY) in a society where I don't fit in at all.
But yeah, for the original question, they won't expect it at all. My behavior displays that I don't stress about anything, but the real reason behind that is that I've already decided to leave it all behind :3

 

[Forveleth]

I have told my partner and a close friend that I am suicidal but no one else. I appear functional to most people so I am guessing it will be a surprise to many.

 

[Rainork]

It will absolutely be the case; no one will expect it because I am considered so balanced. They just don't seen what I feel inside me. Ever since I have been a teenager, I have carried the knowledge that I will die by suicide. Its now getting closer and tie will be here soon

I resonate with carrying the knowledge since being a teenager that suicide will be the way of death.
For a few of those close to me, I don't think it will be a complete surprise- but for everyone else in my life, I believe it will be a quite a shock.
The face many of us paint on each day is so well rehearsed that most fail to see through it even if it cracks sometimes.
I had written out a post to put onto Facebook, to be timed for a couple of hours after my passing to explain a little about the situation to anyone who's interested but I am still uncertain on that.

 

[moribundwhispers]

yea probably

 

[Shadows From Hell]

To some, yes. To others, no.

Do I care either way? No.

 

[Aiyuxiao]

To those few who are close to my husband, probably not. For others who knew my old self and haven't spoken to in years, yes

 

[3FailedAttemptss]

To my family & friends, it'll be no surprise at all. They know that over I've been in the psych ward for the majority of the last year. I've had the police search after me due a failed CTB attempt. I have ordered sodium nitrite countless times. My family now even knows what SN is and confiscates it. So they'll have seen my suicide coming a mile away >w<

But my extended family doesn't know anything. They just know I'm "sick" but they don't know anything else. So they don't know that when I say I'm sick, I mean I'm sick in the fucking head.

 

[Eternal Disaster]

No, my family and friends know about my suicidal ideations. It won't be a surprise for them however they will act like they were unaware of everything. They seriously don't care.

I am a burden on them and they want me to be gone. Isn't it funny that they will attend my funeral and say in front of my corpse that why I didn't reach out to them.

 

[nuva]

I'm not sure, probably many will be surprised.
I think my family suspects that I have some problems, but I try to dispel their suspicions. And my partner, if they know about my problems, then we just don't talk about it. But no one knows about my suicidal thoughts.
Honestly, I would like no one to know that there was something wrong with me, otherwise they will blame themselves for "knowing and not doing anything".

 

[auto138491]

I don't think so because it's so obvious that my life was going to end like this, but my family is so stupid and so good at denying reality, that it might take them by surprise.

same for me also i think

 

[aleaiactaest]

No. It won't be

No, my family and friends know about my suicidal ideations. It won't be a surprise for them however they will act like they were unaware of everything. They seriously don't care.

I am a burden on them and they want me to be gone. Isn't it funny that they will attend my funeral and say in front of my corpse that why I didn't reach out to them.

Yeah. That's how it usually goes. I've met a single person in my entire life that takes this illness seriously. Everyone else simply ignores you or almost goads you into doing it because they don't believe you when you say you would. Then when the time finally comes they act so shocked that something "so horrible" could ever happen.

It's a fucking joke

 

[knickknack81]

I think it absolutely will be for people who think my life is all great because i dont openly talk about my struggles. I really dont want to burden or worry people about how I am doing. I dont think they could really help that much and it wouldn't really gain all that much. I think if I was to CTB, my really close friends who certainly be saddened but maybe not hugely surpised. Being that they know that after some big losses in my life, I am all alone and struggle with depression, anxiety, and isolation, they would probably see that it makes sense. They would still be hurt and saddened though. But yeah, I think people will be surprised if this does come to fruition. But I try not to think about it, as it just makes the thoughts and ideas of CTB even harder then they actually are (which is saying alot). I dont want to hurt anyone with my decisons or actions, but ultimately if thats the way i decide to go, so be it.

 

[starboy2k]

It wont be surprise because some folks know I want to die and they just write it off as manipulation tactics.

It however will be a surprise to those same folks because I actually managed to do the deed and kill myself.

Hope those mournful alligator tears of theirs dont fall onto my corpse somehow.