Discussion Will you reproach someone in your suicide note?

[Eren]

I have a couple of "friends" in real life who have disappointed me a lot, they have become very toxic people and when I do my CTB, I will send them a email to be honest with them (without insults, without making them feel that it was their blame, just making clear what I think of them)

Will you do something like that?

 

[deflagrat]

No, if I did they would probably laugh because they don't care. I want to have nothing to do with them.

 

[Redt2go]

NO
Just ctb and go lol

Even if you don't directly blame them, sending that email is practically blame... if you want to kill yourself that's on you and your choice

Killing yourself brings enough negativity...

 

[Eren]

NO
Just ctb and go lol

Even if you don't directly blame them, sending that email is practically blame... if you want to kill yourself that's on you and your choice

Killing yourself brings enough negativity...

It's true, maybe it would be more mature for me to talk to them about what I think before CTB, so that they do not associate my CTB with the conflict.

 

[Marc]

I like the idea of leaving a message like: "when someone tells you he/she is depressed and feels like it's getting too much, thank them for trusting you as much as to tell you such a personal thing, give them a big hug and don't let go until he/she feels better and lets you go."

 

[pleasethistime]

only thing i would write would be 'dont save me' and 'sorry if this upsets you'. everyone has his/her own problems already. to me everyone is a victim even what we call the bad people.

 

[Eren]

only thing i would write would be 'dont save me' and 'sorry if this upsets you'. everyone has his/her own problems already. to me everyone is a victim even what we call the bad people.

quiet, it does not bother me, in fact I agree with that

 

[Onomotopoeia]

People are flawed, every one of us. Some more than others but CTB should not be about anyone but you. Sure there are life events and even people that may have contributed to your decision but in the end it's your choice and if you go that route attempting to hurt someone else on the way out is pointless, they already hurt, even if you thought they hated you your suicide will likely hurt them. Don't add gas to the fire.

 

[favourite]

I don't have any sworn enemies, but if I did, I probably wouldn't mention them in suicide note, it would only give them the unnecessary satisfaction and I wouldn't waste any paper for this.

 

[Nitromask]

It's pointless in my opinion

 

[Vaughn]

NO. Dont worry or think of others....this is your day...

 

[Eren]

People are flawed, every one of us. Some more than others but CTB should not be about anyone but you. Sure there are life events and even people that may have contributed to your decision but in the end it's your choice and if you go that route attempting to hurt someone else on the way out is pointless, they already hurt, even if you thought they hated you your suicide will likely hurt them. Don't add gas to the fire.

My decision is only my responsibility, it's true, I just wanted to be honest in my suicide note, but it's true that they can feel guilty about it, I hope I do not look like a bad person for thinking this.

 

[Eren]

Now I feel bad for thinking about this, but I have "friends" who have really disappointed me, "friends" who I thought were like brothers.

 

[Memento Mori]

i try not to, but it's hard to not say anything at all.

 

[Onomotopoeia]

Now I feel bad for thinking about this, but I have "friends" who have really disappointed me, "friends" who I thought were like brothers.

No need to add guilt to yourself either. It is often natural to want to throw punches back when you feel you are being struck. The thing is life life is tainted by your own eyes, sometimes you are being struck at, sometimes you are not. In either case trying to throw punches on the way out can only serve to cause more harm and is better left alone.

If you feel you need for confrontation then maybe actually do that, in person, and have a conversation if you feel it serves a purpose. Doing after your gone will get you nowhere though. Good luck

 

[TAW122]

I have mixed feelings about it, like I would want to say yes, but there is a part of me that says no. I do have a complex of wanting to get that last word in and my two cents in, but yet at the same time, I could see that it could be at best, futile, at worst, do more harm than necessary. Therefore, I'm sorta gray on whether or not to give a piece of my mind; I would say it depends on my circumstances. If I am just going to go as quietly and quickly as possible, I may not even write or say anything to/about them.

 

[21Neberg]

I'm going to apologize to my parents ofcourse, but there is one person I will address. I'm going to tell my ex, who's long moved on from me, that none of this is her fault. I'd hate to pass some of my pain into others, though I realize that's impossible.

 

[TAW122]

I'm going to apologize to my parents ofcourse, but there is one person I will address. I'm going to tell my ex, who's long moved on from me, that none of this is her fault. I'd hate to pass some of my pain into others, though I realize that's impossible.

I'm going to leave a note for my parents as well. I feel that since they have done a lot for me (despite my poor relationship with my father and distant relationship with my mother -- I wasn't close to my mother growing up, closer to my father), and also give them instructions on what to do after my death. Also, of course, I will try my best to comfort my family that it isn't their fault and that ultimately, I've made my decision after careful, logical and rational consideration (including weighing my future and what not) and decided this over a long period of time. It won't take away all the pain but will at least alleviate some and help them find some peace as well as letting me know that I'm at peace.

 

[favourite]

Now I feel bad for thinking about this, but I have "friends" who have really disappointed me, "friends" who I thought were like brothers.

No need to feel guilty. But maybe the face-to face confrontation, or even sending them emails before, would be better option - you would ctb more peacefully, with no (or less) unresolved issues with people.

 

[Eren]

I'm going to leave a note for my parents as well. I feel that since they have done a lot for me (despite my poor relationship with my father and distant relationship with my mother -- I wasn't close to my mother growing up, closer to my father), and also give them instructions on what to do after my death. Also, of course, I will try my best to comfort my family that it isn't their fault and that ultimately, I've made my decision after careful, logical and rational consideration (including weighing my future and what not) and decided this over a long period of time. It won't take away all the pain but will at least alleviate some and help them find some peace as well as letting me know that I'm at peace.

I would like to leave a note to my parents, they have behaved very well with me, but I do not know what to say, since in any case it will be very difficult for them, really if I am still alive it is for my mother.

 

[favourite]

I would like to leave a note to my parents, they have behaved very well with me, but I do not know what to say, since in any case it will be very difficult for them, really if I am still alive it is for my mother.

Yep, I get that. I hope you'll make the right decision.

 

[Funkbunny]

Absolutely not. Telling them what you think as you say, is proportioning blame in my opinion... and I mean no harm by my comment.

Write to get what ever it is out of your system. Leave it a while. Read what you wrote and I think you'll have something slightly different to say.. you might end up having nothing to say at all.

You're the boss of you though! You'll do what you think is right.

 

[Rex2019]

Never. I don't think anyone should take their life in anger. One must be at peace. And if one is, then there is no need for venvenge. Because in the grand scheme of of things, it doesn't matter anyway. If you know what it's like to be that hurt, don't hurt others leaving hurtful notes.. they can't even fix it even if they wanted to, coz you are dead. They will suffer forever and can't do anything about it. Do you really want to do that to someone? So think carefully.

 

[Eren]

Absolutely not. Telling them what you think as you say, is proportioning blame in my opinion... and I mean no harm by my comment.

Write to get what ever it is out of your system. Leave it a while. Read what you wrote and I think you'll have something slightly different to say.. you might end up having nothing to say at all.

You're the boss of you though! You'll do what you think is right.

Never. I don't think anyone should take their life in anger. One must be at peace. And if one is, then there is no need for venvenge. Because in the grand scheme of of things, it doesn't matter anyway. If you know what it's like to be that hurt, don't hurt others leaving hurtful notes.. they can't even fix it even if they wanted to, coz you are dead. They will suffer forever and can't do anything about it. Do you really want to do that to someone? So think carefully.

Ok it's true, I've let myself be carried away by resentment, I'll solve those personal problems long before ctb

 

[Eren]

I hope I do not look like a bad person.

 

[Funkbunny]

I hope I do not look like a bad person.

No you don't. This journey, whilst something we have in common, is about us as individuals.

I can only speak from my viewpoint and obviously that might not match yours, but both are valid. Trust me, I've had anger toward people, and I'm far from a floating zen Buddha, but when it comes to my final act, it's about me and me alone. No one else, nothing else. I will have that peace.

You deserve the right to voice your anger, be that in private to yourself, here, however you choose. A difficult element to this journey is no matter what our intention, no matter our choice of words, how much we try to let people know there is nothing they could have done to stop it, they still will blame themselves to some degree for some period of time. That's a tough one to get to grips with.

Do I think you're a bad person? No. Quite the opposite. Peace!

 

[Redt2go]

I hope I do not look like a bad person.

Nope! Thank you for sharing your honest thoughts. It's not easy to do. None of us think less of you we just wanted to offer our opinions.

 

[lululoo]

I hope I do not look like a bad person.

Please don't feel bad. I'm in my 30's and I still had moments as of a few months ago where I wanted to reproach my parents in my note. I'm not going to, but the thought happened. You are not a bad person.

 

[Dog Food]

YES. Myself. I suck.

 

[Redt2go]

YES. Myself. I suck.

:(