Venting Why why why

[Seered Doom]

I want to sob my eyes out like I did last night. There are eyes surrounding me, even when I'm alone. My C-PTSD has gotten even worse and I hate being in this skin I have to call home. Nowhere feels safe, not even my own head. People are gonna leave me bc I'm too much to handle and I wish I can CTB easily. I wish this cryptid eldritch thing in my chest bursts out and reveals itself to the world.

I'm tired of choking down my emotions just to make others more comfortable. I'm tired of everyone treating me like an experiment or some sort of medical anomaly toy to play with. I'm so sick of people thinking I'm lesser than them and my pain shouldn't be taken seriously. I'm tired of being treated like I'm selfish just for trying to stand up for my needs. NO, MY MOTHER'S THE VICTIM OF ME AND MY DAD. SHE'S BEING ABUSED. POOR MOTHER! FUCK ME THOUGH BC I'M AUTISTIC AND ALL MY MENTAL HEALTH STUFF MAKES ME WEIRD AND SOMEONE WHO SHOULD BE DEMONIZED!

I've split over 1k of me inside my body outside of the creature. I've gotten worse overtime, but no, I'm the problem because it's so much easier than for other people to realize they screwed up too. It's easier to hurt someone like me than to accept the truth, yet they want me to be alive. Fuck. Off!

If any pro-lifer tries to pull some fuck shit with me; spare your breath and space. I'm 23. I'm a guy stuck in this female body because of parents and I'm in a conservative US state. Save your time. Don't you think I'm already as damaged as I am?

 

[The Burning Fool]

Your essential human rights are being violated obviously. I think you're in the right for having strong emotions. It can't reasonably be expected of you to repress those for long.

 

[FuneralCry]

That sounds really horrible what you've have to endure, it must be so torturous, I really do hate how there isn't the option to just easily be permanently free from all the suffering. To me humans truly are the worst species with how they create so much harm.

 

[Seered Doom]

It hurts. All of me hurts. I didn't take my meds today and I see why I think my meds don't do shit. I feel nearly the same as I do without them. The major difference is the intensity I feel.

 

[Cryptonite]

Just like most people with mental health troubles, I believe you must have been misdiagnosed. Your problem is not C-PTSD or autism, your problem lies in personality, i. e. severe neuroticism or personality disorders. Doctors are completely and utterly incompetent.