Why it's important to know exactly who you are

[sserafim]

You are perfect the way you are: All animals have a "range" in which they exist. A dog is no better than a human, or worse for that matter. It's just different. The issue with civilization is that high and lower IQ people co-exist in the same environment which wouldn't have been a thing in hunter gatherer societies given people who were different would be outcasted. When a tribe defeats another, they kill all the men. So social isolation wouldn't exist in tribal societies because you would be surrounded by people just like you. The issue with this society is that people like us NEETs don't match with the general population, and hence we have to retreat from society somewhat. If all of society were NEET types with IQ's around 115-120+, then we would fit in fine.

If someone were to give a Chimpanzee a gun, and that Chimpanzee started shooting Chimps and other people who would you blame? Even though it's the Chimpanzee doing it, nobody in their right mind would blame the Chimpanzee. Everyone would point the blame at the person who gave it the gun in the first place. Without "alien technology" the Chimpanzee could have never have come up with that gun in the first place. The damage it's doing is amplified by the gun.

Every creature is no better or worse than any other, it's just different. If you leave them in their natural environment, their negative effects won't spill over into the rest of existence. It's only when you mix people with different IQ's etc. that you get "conflict" as such.

People who succeed do things naturally: I lol at people who think college is about being an individual and working hard. Most people just help each other in group chats where they all cooperate to get things done. I remember some autistic person said on reddit or something that they were accidentally invited to one of these places and they saw all the normies talking among themselves and basically getting through college in a group. Basically, normies are guaranteed to get through it due to social connections. The college knows this, but they assume everyone is doing it. If you're struggling at college it means that you likely lack social support. Normies don't drop out of college often due to this social net.

Analogy: A doctor does a scan of your body and realizes you have cancer and have 6 months to live. In order to spare you any emotional pain the doctor tells you you're fine. You are then happy and leave with a good conscious not knowing you have months to live. Then suddenly you are dying. You lived the last 5 months in bliss, however you curse the doctors name because if you knew you were dying of cancer you could have seeked treatments and done things you always wanted to do. Maybe even settle some things before you die. Because your model of reality didn't match up with your circumstances, you ultimately suffered even if living a lie gave you some "bliss".

 

[ijustwishtodie]

It's a hard life if you're not part of the in-group. It wasn't as much of an issue in past societies but it's a problem that's been greatly exacerbated in the modern age due to a variety of factors.

 

[cowboypants]

Survival of the fittest, unless the govt or society makes an effort to integrate us.

I used to get shamed by a math teacher in school cause of scoring almost negative marks. I wanted to not be alive, and I was just a kid, thought no way life was worth it.

 

[sserafim]

It's a hard life if you're not part of the in-group. It wasn't as much of an issue in past societies but it's a problem that's been greatly exacerbated in the modern age due to a variety of factors.

How to join the in-group

 

[derpyderpins]

And do you think you know exactly who you are? That would be impressive. Follow-up, do you think who you are is all you can be? Because you'd be wrong.

I'm trying not to push back on you so much anymore, because I want us to get along. I'll just say that as a higher IQ person, I see no reason not to live with lower IQ people. I don't think that is getting to the issue you're trying to address.

 

[derpyderpins]

How to join the in-group

The mini unwritten contracts theory. Most people are - in general - nice (which is different than being kind. Whether it is real or for appearances is largely immaterial.)

Do you consider, when you see posts on here, something like 'I see X is hurting, I wonder what I can say to help them feel better?' being autistic does not preclude you. Think of it as learning normie language. 'I'm sorry that happened,' 'you'll get them next time,' 'I'm here if you want to talk,' 'i hope you feel better soon'... These might seem silly to you, but they help a majority of people feel better.

So, to join an "in group":

1. Pick a group. I recommend not going for the most "in" group by default.
2. Express interest in being part of the group.
3. Speak the nice normie language when possible.

Being a cute girl is a cheat code, again. Being autistic in 2024 can actually be helpful, too, because young people are open minded. "I'm sorry, I'm autistic so I don't always know what to say, I hope you can understand..." Huge points as long as you make an effort to speak the language. Normies get off on being nice to people with disabilities.

 

[Forever Sleep]

Hmm, but what would we do for food, shelter, basic sanitation, healthcare if everyone became NEET?

How would any society work where some of its members don't 'carry' others? Just in terms of trade even. Do you know how to synthesize painkillers for when you experience pain? Probably not. So- do you expect the person who does know how to do that to give you it for free?

Plus, I wouldn't assume that there are some people who are absolutely fit for the world of college and work. There may be people that struggle more- certainly but, plenty of people struggle in life. No matter how neurotypical they seem.

But- true in as much as I think the modern world isn't a healthy way for people to live. Living compacted in over populated cities, working all hours to barely get by, being isolated, eating and drinking processed food and drink.

 

[Dr Iron Arc]

This scene always messes me up whenever I rewatch Avatar because I still genuinely don't know the answer for myself. :/

 

[halleyscomet]

This scene always messes me up whenever I rewatch Avatar because I still genuinely don't know the answer for myself. :/

We all need an uncle Iroh in our lives tbh

 

[last3mos]

I dropped out of university twice, fought to go back both times. I was fortunate, I graduated, though it wasn't anything that I was able to give back to the world with. Now that I'm dying the world would see me as having wasted that privilege.

I had one of those moments of being an autistic person suddenly getting a glimpse of the experience of most university students, the help, the social experience of everyone pulling together, and getting through as a group. But I also saw autistic people in those groups, and forming their own groups. I didn't fit in there either and couldn't build support with people. I struggle to build support, and I think if I hadn't been so isolated, if I'd had the help I needed, I would have been able to get the degree I actually wanted, and wouldnt have dropped out those times.

If I could choose again I wouldn't have gone to university at all. I was not made for academia even if I love to learn, and when I did manage to connect and have people in my life, I usually chose the worst people who damaged me greatly.

I wish I had lived my life naturally, but I lived it trying to make the family that abused me love me, and I never got it.

 

[Havnis]

Easy question, because someone told me "You are not you, you are just reflections, you are reflections of everything that you think you know, everything that you have been taught." So since that time I am trying to know myself, and I found myself on reflection of others.

 

[Archness]

The mini unwritten contracts theory. Most people are - in general - nice (which is different than being kind. Whether it is real or for appearances is largely immaterial.)

Do you consider, when you see posts on here, something like 'I see X is hurting, I wonder what I can say to help them feel better?' being autistic does not preclude you. Think of it as learning normie language. 'I'm sorry that happened,' 'you'll get them next time,' 'I'm here if you want to talk,' 'i hope you feel better soon'... These might seem silly to you, but they help a majority of people feel better.

So, to join an "in group":

1. Pick a group. I recommend not going for the most "in" group by default.
2. Express interest in being part of the group.
3. Speak the nice normie language when possible.

Being a cute girl is a cheat code, again. Being autistic in 2024 can actually be helpful, too, because young people are open minded. "I'm sorry, I'm autistic so I don't always know what to say, I hope you can understand..." Huge points as long as you make an effort to speak the language. Normies get off on being nice to people with disabilities.

I know OP is autistic, and was partially talking about being autistic, and maybe you just didn't notice that detail, so excuse me for seeming a bit too critical.

Going chameleon and faking it can only get so far. It it really "Just another language"? Are you, yourself, autistic? Or just higher IQ then others? IMO if you're high IQ you only need to talk down to normies for them to understand, and not talk about things they couldn't or would take a long time to teach them. You also fail to realize that such fakeness and masking is not inductive to real connection, the kind humans really want to have. If you don't have any interest and just "Express Interest", how will that work out down the line?

I guess it could work for just extracting the benefits, but this is more then that.

 

[derpyderpins]

I know OP is autistic, and was partially talking about being autistic, and maybe you just didn't notice that detail, so excuse me for seeming a bit too critical.

Going chameleon and faking it can only get so far. It it really "Just another language"? Are you, yourself, autistic? Or just higher IQ then others? IMO if you're high IQ you only need to talk down to normies for them to understand, and not talk about things they couldn't or would take a long time to teach them. You also fail to realize that such fakeness and masking is not inductive to real connection, the kind humans really want to have. If you don't have any interest and just "Express Interest", how will that work out down the line?

I guess it could work for just extracting the benefits, but this is more then that.

I mention her being autistic in the response ... So yeah I noticed it.

I'd messaged with her a good bit at that point, and I was trying to put things in a way she'd accept. If you actually want to give her advice that might be helpful rather than re-affirming her negative absolute beliefs, it's a very very small needle to thread.

You have to watch out for those absolute beliefs. There are certain rules of the universe. Normies (whatever that means on any given day) aren't real people in her world, they're just sheep. Work is slavery. Human connections are worthless and she has no desire for them - never mind how much she obsesses over guys she chooses to latch onto. Her autism - which by her admission is mild at worst and potentially misdiagnosed - is crippling and makes it impossible for her to understand human emotions or hold any job. She is on a gallant quest for truth and logic, but present her with any and she'll run away.

So, I was trying to craft a solution within those parameters that might make her at least somewhat consider that other people exist and there should be somewhat of an exchange when you interact with them. A 'thank you' if they help you, a 'sorry to hear that' if they're sad, etc. If I just suggest to say that to be polite, the response will be something about how there's no need for that and normies and human connections are just stupid, so I tried to analyze it down in a way that makes the interaction sound like a protocol with rules to follow to achieve desired results. It was meant to be a baby step. She's built her wall very high, so I figured anything that would get her to lower it a bit would be something, at least.

 

[enough of this]

Because without knowing who you are, you can't know who to continue becoming from there. Just like your GPS has to know your location to know how to get you to where you want to go.

 

[needsomeoptions]

I have spent so long pretending to be a 'normie' I don't know who I am.
I just know I'm not in my natural habitat in this world.
Thank you for sharing

 

[ImTelling]

I've read that in certain religions if you CTB in this life you've already CTB in a previous life and you're doomed to do it over and over again for many lives.

I feel like I was Ricardo Lopez, and now I'm this other fat gross disgusting loser. That's who I am. I am a gross animal that needs to be put down. I'm nothing more than a pest.