Discussion Why is suicide viewed as a tragedy?

[imightbestupid]

Something I don't get is why suicide is so "tragic" or depressing. We're all aware people will die, so why does it matter how soon it is? If life ends, there's no point in living it out. You'll die either way.

The same people that think it's sad are the same people who say dead loved ones were "put to rest". Death is rest. If someone wants that eternal rest, should there be anyone to stop them? If you hit rock bottom, why climb your way to the top if release is right at your door?

I might expand on this later, but please share your thoughts!!

 

[Unbearable Mr. Bear]

Part of it is because suicide affects living people. For some, that is the tragic part, not the part where, you know, pain and suffering caused someone to take their lives.

Maybe it is also because for some, life isn't as shitty as for others, and these people don't have a lot of empathy on them sometimes. They can't fathom our pain.

 

[Alexandra0]

If a person has committed or wants to commit suicide, it means that he is unhappy for some reason. Suicide is an extremely difficult ethical issue. It is hard to suffer during life and before death. It is very sad.
It makes sense to live a happy life, many people are happy and love their lives. But not everyone is like that. Everyone has the right to choose, of course

 

[qualityOV3Rquantity]

Something I don't get is why suicide is so "tragic" or depressing. We're all aware people will die, so why does it matter how soon it is? If life ends, there's no point in living it out. You'll die either way.

The same people that think it's sad are the same people who say dead loved ones were "put to rest". Death is rest. If someone wants that eternal rest, should there be anyone to stop them? If you hit rock bottom, why climb your way to the top if release is right at your door?

I might expand on this later, but please share your thoughts!!

Suicide is viewed as a tragedy by most people because generally death is seen as bad, undesirable, etc. and it is nearly always seen as less desirable than fixing the problem that is making a person suicidal. The dominant narrative of mental illness and suicide is that people who experience mental illness are not 'in their right mind' and they are going through a temporary difficult time that would soon go away if they just waited or got professional help. And the tragedy is that they ended up dying when all they needed to do was get help or open up to someone.

Of course, the issue is that while some people match the above description, for many people mental illness lasts their entire lives, and is resistant to treatment. In my case, I have opened up to others - my entire family, my friend group, the suicide hotline - and I have sought help from numerous doctors, psychiatrists, therapists, and even naturopaths, but having people who want to help you doesn't necessarily mean their attempts to help will work.

I'm rambling a bit but I hope this makes sense! It's my perspective anyway.

 

[FuneralCry]

I understand, I'll always see existence as the most terrible tragedy, to me existence just feels like a mistake that just causes harm and suffering until non-existence takes away all anyway and I wish I never existed more than anything.

For me non-existence is all that's positive and I don't see the tragedy in escaping from all future unnecessary suffering in this existence where there is no limit as to how much one can be tortured just waiting to not exist anyway, I find it so horrific how a human can suffer for so long just to die in agony from old age, for me existence really is the problem and it's one only non-existence can solve for me. I'll just always see existing as only suffering and I suffer simply from existing, to me existence really is an abomination that just causes harm and suffering, the fact that this existence was even imposed especially as there were never any disadvantages to not suffering at all is so tragic to me, I never should had been burdened with this futile, cruel and deeply undesirable existence.

 

[afinedaytoexit]

I think suicide is viewed as a tragedy because the only people who are able to talk about it are the loved ones who remain behind. We only get their perspective, it's a numbers game, so their point of view is dominant.
Also, I think that suicide is a fundamental taboo in any healthy society. Not that suicide is evil, sinful, otherwise I wouldn't be there. And I definitely believe that every taboo causes harm in the long run. But if suicide was suddenly deemed acceptable in any society, I think grave ethical problems would immediately surge : eugenism to begin with, or letting marginalized/victimized people off themselves instead of working on systemic solutions, on justice for all...

So, yeah, although I feel deep relief in finding a place like this, and although I believe suicidality should be way more spoken about, I believe suicide is better off remaining "a tragedy" in the dominant narrative.

 

[TheVanishingPoint]

Suicide is dangerous not because it ends a life, but because it breaks the invisible contract with the marketplace of existence. Society needs bodies that consume, obey, and hope. Those who take their own lives pull back the curtain and reveal there is nothing behind it. That is why suicide must be defused: medicalized, ridiculed, pathologized. Not to save the suicidal, but to preserve the narrative.

 

[Unbearable Mr. Bear]

Suicide is dangerous not because it ends a life, but because it breaks the invisible contract with the marketplace of existence. Society needs bodies that consume, obey, and hope. Those who take their own lives pull back the curtain and reveal there is nothing behind it. That is why suicide must be defused: medicalized, ridiculed, pathologized. Not to save the suicidal, but to preserve the narrative.

Suicide is taboo because the capitalist system needs people to slave away so it and their benefactors can grow and become more powerful.

 

[amerie]

I think it's hard to accept someone dying before they're "ready" in societal standards, and people also take it really personally because our survival instinct is so strong that the fact that someone would willingly take their own life is kind of like breaking the 4th wall in a sense? Like cannibalism.

 

[stack-audio]

I completely agree with

Unbearable Mr. Bear

, they want us to work until we collapse, plus people are scared of their own mortality, I find it comfortable to talk about dying as I have no empathy due to a frontal lobe brain injury which makes me unpredictable and a liability, I want to die and I don't think it's fair big brother stops us in every way, by removing certain salts for sale and any easy method like access to nambutal, it scares normal people who don't have to go through life confined to their house. All of this is very wrong and we should be allowed to do what we want when we want.

 

[Life'sA6itch]

Suicide is viewed as a tragedy by most people because generally death is seen as bad, undesirable, etc. and it is nearly always seen as less desirable than fixing the problem that is making a person suicidal. The dominant narrative of mental illness and suicide is that people who experience mental illness are not 'in their right mind' and they are going through a temporary difficult time that would soon go away if they just waited or got professional help. And the tragedy is that they ended up dying when all they needed to do was get help or open up to someone.

Of course, the issue is that while some people match the above description, for many people mental illness lasts their entire lives, and is resistant to treatment. In my case, I have opened up to others - my entire family, my friend group, the suicide hotline - and I have sought help from numerous doctors, psychiatrists, therapists, and even naturopaths, but having people who want to help you doesn't necessarily mean their attempts to help will work.

I'm rambling a bit but I hope this makes sense! It's my perspective anyway.

I agree and add that there are also fairly large numbers of people who are wanting to escape the various injustices of modern life, those things that cannot or will not be changed and those things that stand or are allowed because others benefit from them and the beneficiaries don't want those things to change. Those who benefit or those blind to the problems can contribute to the helplessness and futility of the sufferer whether these people acknowledge they are or not.

 

[CrownRoyal]

Something I don't get is why suicide is so "tragic" or depressing. We're all aware people will die, so why does it matter how soon it is? If life ends, there's no point in living it out. You'll die either way.

The same people that think it's sad are the same people who say dead loved ones were "put to rest". Death is rest. If someone wants that eternal rest, should there be anyone to stop them? If you hit rock bottom, why climb your way to the top if release is right at your door?

I might expand on this later, but please share your thoughts!!

Perhaps in their view, it's a tragedy because the person might have contributed something significant to the world, but now, once they are gone, they are unable to do that.

 

[permanently tired]

Perhaps in their view, it's a tragedy because the person might have contributed something significant to the world, but now, once they are gone, they are unable to do that.

I've thought about this, except as the person on the other side. I'd rather let what I could've given to the world die with me instead. You never know whose hands your work will end up in. Take mj as an example, he died and his music catalog was sold to sony. They keep profiting off of his music which he never would've wanted. He detested them in life and if he had a say in death he certainly would've let it be known. I'd rather let my art sit in silence then for it to be tarnished by bringing it into the world.

 

[Unbearable Mr. Bear]

I've thought about this, except as the person on the other side. I'd rather let what I could've given to the world die with me instead. You never know whose hands your work will end up in. Take mj as an example, he died and his music catalog was sold to sony. They keep profiting off of his music which he never would've wanted. He detested them in life and if he had a say in death he certainly would've let it be known. I'd rather let my art sit in silence then for it to be tarnished by bringing it into the world.

something something nobel prize

 

[TBONTB]

Something I don't get is why suicide is so "tragic" or depressing. We're all aware people will die, so why does it matter how soon it is? If life ends, there's no point in living it out. You'll die either way.

The same people that think it's sad are the same people who say dead loved ones were "put to rest". Death is rest. If someone wants that eternal rest, should there be anyone to stop them? If you hit rock bottom, why climb your way to the top if release is right at your door?

I might expand on this later, but please share your thoughts!!

I just think the idea or feeling that life is to be prized is pretty deeply ingrained across human cultures. It's reflected in most religions and even for non-religious folks it seems pretty deep. The common idea is that life isn't something a human should decide to take....it should be nature or god. And it's seen as sad if people don't love their lives and want to continue them as long as feasible. I think there's also this component of death hurting the rest of the community that makes it hard for the community as a whole. Just my thoughts of why that is.

I think suicide is viewed as a tragedy because the only people who are able to talk about it are the loved ones who remain behind. We only get their perspective, it's a numbers game, so their point of view is dominant.
Also, I think that suicide is a fundamental taboo in any healthy society. Not that suicide is evil, sinful, otherwise I wouldn't be there. And I definitely believe that every taboo causes harm in the long run. But if suicide was suddenly deemed acceptable in any society, I think grave ethical problems would immediately surge : eugenism to begin with, or letting marginalized/victimized people off themselves instead of working on systemic solutions, on justice for all...

So, yeah, although I feel deep relief in finding a place like this, and although I believe suicidality should be way more spoken about, I believe suicide is better off remaining "a tragedy" in the dominant narrative.

I've thought about this idea you are bringing up. What if it was easy to suicide. Just call up and get your government pill when you are ready to call it quits. To be a little careful, perhaps there should be a six month waiting period to reduce impulsivity. Especially for older folks like myself...so much less burden to taxpayers, to loved ones who might have to take care of us. Such a win-win!!! This is of course a silly idea, but it was interesting to imagine

The I wondered how many people would call for their pill. I actually don't think it's very many. The vast majority of people seem to like to live...even when disabled, even when ill, even when very old. So I personally don't think society would break down very much if suicide was more embraced and enabled.

I understand, I'll always see existence as the most terrible tragedy, to me existence just feels like a mistake that just causes harm and suffering until non-existence takes away all anyway and I wish I never existed more than anything.

For me non-existence is all that's positive and I don't see the tragedy in escaping from all future unnecessary suffering in this existence where there is no limit as to how much one can be tortured just waiting to not exist anyway, I find it so horrific how a human can suffer for so long just to die in agony from old age, for me existence really is the problem and it's one only non-existence can solve for me. I'll just always see existing as only suffering and I suffer simply from existing, to me existence really is an abomination that just causes harm and suffering, the fact that this existence was even imposed especially as there were never any disadvantages to not suffering at all is so tragic to me, I never should had been burdened with this futile, cruel and deeply undesirable existence.

Sorry to hear existence feels so painful.

 

[Eudaimonic]

Pro-life bias. For all the people saying, "because it implies that they were suffering deeply," consider that most of these people see staying alive even in a miserable situation as an act of heroism.

 

[gothbird]

I don't think suicide is inherently tragic. Sometimes it's rational. Sometimes it's the end of a long, quiet war. I only see it as truly tragic when it's someone too young to fully understand what they're doing like kids, teenagers, people in their very early 20s, still under the weight of everyone else's expectations, or stuck in a brain that hasn't even finished developing. That's when I feel a kind of grief for what they might have become, if they'd been given time, support, autonomy, and honesty. Not because life always gets better, but because they weren't in a place to decide freely. They were just desperate. That's different.

Otherwise? If someone's done the work, thought it through, tried everything, and still lands at the door of death calmly, I don't see that as tragic. I see that as a kind of completion. A choice. And maybe that's what scares people: that someone else might face the void without fear, when they're still running from it themselves.

 

[Apathy79]

For most people, time moves way too fast. Life gets away from them. They start off with dreams and projects and all these things they want to do and explore, the world is their oyster and early on it seems like they have endless time. The tragedy to them is they can't see most of the world, they can't do most of the things they want to do, meet the people they want to meet, develop the connections they want to develop, create the things they want to create because time passes faster than they thought. Whether you're an atheist or believe in something spiritual affects whether you see this as your only shot or part of a longer sequence but regardless the urgency to experience the best of what life has to offer and discover it's mysteries is deeply ingrained.

Suicide, especially of the young, I guess is seen as missing out on all of that, and is hard for people to fathom. Everything that makes life so precious and exciting for them is thrown out. Parents get hit the hardest because, at least the good ones, feel like they spent so much of their own lives creating and moulding this person, who is like their legacy they're leaving to the world when they're gone. For many parents their entire lives are wrapped up in their kids for so long they don't know much else. To see them die at all, but especially voluntarily, is tragic. There's like an unspoken knowledge when your child is born that this person will transcend you, you'll never know life without them again.

I think for older people, particularly in perilous health situations, most people understand and accept it much more.