Why does my brother have to keep hurting and abusing me everyday?! (Vent)

[Water-Lily]

I know why

He doesn't voluntarily want to. He doesn't want to abuse me and my father and I see glimpses of pain and sadness in him

But, he drives us away. He has beat up my father before threatened him. He doe the same to me (blocking me, etc)

He's 15 and I hate him. We used to be closer as kids. But after our abusive mom died be became an incarnate of her.

Me and my dad grew closer after my mom passed away. Now my brother has became her and we are at a loss

Mad dad is usually at work, but always tells me that if my brother dares to put his hands one to call the police. I just I didnt have this burden

 

[Ender]

This is accurate. Today, my brother threatened to hit me, he talked down to me. I can he is in pain. Our mother wasn't there for us. He too doesn't want to harm us, but he is so abusive towards me. He's 16, and I'm 18, you would think I would just defend myself. But I just can't, I understand and respect his hatred. In the end, I probably deserve it. He throws me and hits me often. He's a big person, I'm a little skeleton. I'm terribly sorry you and your father have to go through this. It's truly disastrous.

 

[Water-Lily]

This is accurate. Today, my brother threatened to hit me, he talked down to me. I can he is in pain. Our mother wasn't there for us. He too doesn't want to harm us, but he is so abusive towards me. He's 16, and I'm 18, you would think I would just defend myself. But I just can't, I understand and respect his hatred. In the end, I probably deserve it. He throws me and hits me often. He's a big person, I'm a little skeleton. I'm terribly sorry you and your father have to go through this. It's truly disastrous.

It is. Yeah and I were best friends as kids. We were there for each other and he also spent time with my dad. I still rememeber how he, myself, and my dad all played frisbee together a few years back. But I guess abuse and my moms death took a bad toll on him and now he is trying to deal with it by lashing out

So I ignore him now. Today he told me he intentionally ate my dragon fruit. So I had nothing. And he does shit like this. So I now have to hide my own fruit. My dad got down on him. My brother is also failing all his classes and my dad has been threatening to take him out the school which causes my brother extreme anger

I had brought up the idea of counseling, but my dad is fed up and just wants the cops to take him away. We are both exhausted

 

[throwaway123]

you have to call the cops. I wish someone helped me when I was your age. When you brother is finally gone it can change a lot. Your whole life can change. Trust me you have to tackle this early before it completely ruins your life like it did for me and a lot of other people here.
You either have to get the abuser out or get out of the abusive environment.

 

[Water-Lily]

you have to call the cops. I wish someone helped me when I was your age. When you brother is finally gone it can change a lot. Your whole life can change. Trust me you have to tackle this early before it completely ruins your life like it did for me and a lot of other people here.
You either have to get the abuser out or get out of the abusive environment.

I cant do much unless he puts his hands on me. Other than that police might not do much.
As for getting out that isn't feasible at the moment unfortunately

 

[throwaway123]

I cant do much unless he puts his hands on me. Other than that police might not do much.
As for getting out that isn't feasible at the moment unfortunately

can't your father send him to the youth services? You can legally give up the child to the state. That works in most countries. They're gonna get into the system but then he might finally what get a reality check.

 

[Water-Lily]

can't your father send him to the youth services? You can legally give up the child to the state. That works in most countries. They're gonna get into the system but then he might finally what get a reality check.

My dad has thought about that. Like having the cops take him away. Yet he is also conflicted on it too. For him its waiting for him to do something and then have cops kick him out. Though waiting isn't dong much tbh. Though the youth services isn't a bad idea. I could bring it up

 

[throwaway123]

My dad has thought about that. Like having the cops take him away. Yet he is also conflicted on it too. For him its waiting for him to do something and then have cops kick him out. Though waiting isn't dong much tbh. Though the youth services isn't a bad idea. I could bring it up

Yeah better to be safe than sorry. You must take action before something bad happens.

 

[Water-Lily]

Yeah better to be safe than sorry. You must take action before something bad happens.

Your right. I think my dad is fearful of what would happen to my brother and I guess cause its his kid. My dads been all over the place
Like, for us, our brother is like another version of our abusive mom. These days I find my dad asking about my mental health more so he seems more aware of my suffering

 

[throwaway123]

Your right. I think my dad is fearful of what would happen to my brother and I guess cause its his kid. My dads been all over the place
Like, for us, our brother is like another version of our abusive mom. These days I find my dad asking about my mental health more so he seems more aware of my suffering

It can be very hard to let go of family members even if they are abusive. It sucks but once you deal with your brother you can only improve. You can't let yourself be dragged down in your own home no matter who it is.

 

[Water-Lily]

It can be very hard to let go of family members even if they are abusive. It sucks but once you deal with your brother you can only improve. You can't let yourself be dragged down in your own home no matter who it is.

No totally. In the mean time I will ignore him. Treat him like he's a pest. And knowing him he will l try to throw snide remarks but I'll have to not throw shade. However I did stand up to him today
He asked if he could use my exercise bike cause he wants to lose weight. I told him no and that his behavior doesn't warrant it.

 

[throwaway123]

No totally. In the mean time I will ignore him. Treat him like he's a pest. And knowing him he will l try to throw snide remarks but I'll have to not throw shade. However I did stand up to him today
He asked if he could use my exercise bike cause he wants to lose weight. I told him no and that his behavior doesn't warrant it.

that's good. You need to set up boundaries. Standing up for yourself is always good.

 

[Water-Lily]

that's good. You need to set up boundaries. Standing up for yourself is always good.

Yeah. Im a keep at that. But in the mean while I will shift my communication style so I can protect myself.