Why do people want responsibilities?

[sserafim]

I see people talk about wanting children, and I don't understand. Why would you *want* to take on responsibilities? I don't want any at all. For me, the less responsibilities, the better. I don't want to be responsible for anything or anyone

 

[sickgirlzis]

having responsibilities gives you something to do. unironically I would like to take on responsibilities because I know it would pull me out of my depression. when you have no responsibilities you are probably either going to end up depressed or a bum.
I understand what you're saying though, it's scary taking on permanent responsibilities like that. that's why I'm apprehensive about a lot of decisions I make sometimes
I understand what you're saying though, it's scary taking on permanent responsibilities like that. that's why I'm apprehensive about a lot of decisions I make sometimes

 

[sserafim]

having responsibilities gives you something to do. unironically I would like to take on responsibilities because I know it would pull me out of my depression. when you have no responsibilities you are probably either going to end up depressed or a bum.

You can pursue your hobbies though. You don't *need* to have responsibilities. In fact, having no responsibilities gives you more time to pursue your passions and do what you *want* rather than what you're obligated to do. If you don't have any responsibilities, then you have the freedom to do whatever you want to

 

[sickgirlzis]

You can pursue your hobbies though. You don't *need* to have responsibilities. In fact, having no responsibilities gives you more time to pursue your passions and do what you *want* rather than what you're obligated to do

often times for some people pursuing hobbies can also mean taking on responsibilities related to it. you don't have to have responsibilities, I don't have any major ones, but most people have them because it adds some sort of stability. and for some people, it may be related to their interests so that's why

 

[willitpass]

Having no responsibilities makes me feel worse about myself. I enjoy feeling like I have a purpose and as though I have been successful at something. The idea of sitting there and doing nothing but hobbies and leisure activities for the rest of my life sounds terrible. It would be nice for a couple of weeks and then I would get bored and feel like I'm wasting my day away. The responsibilities I have are responsibilities I enjoy. I love my job and I love what I'm studying. Not having those responsibilities would feel purposeless and life would have even less meaning to me than it already does.

 

[Alltheywanted]

I don't understand it either. I hate responsibility from the bottom of my heart.
But when it comes to having children, it all comes down to our evolution and nothing else. People want to feel useful to society and luckily I'm not like them. The point is, if more people were like me, we wouldn't exist as a species.
At least that's how I see it ;3

 

[tbroken]

having responsibilities gives you something to do. unironically I would like to take on responsibilities because I know it would pull me out of my depression. when you have no responsibilities you are probably either going to end up depressed or a bum.
I understand what you're saying though, it's scary taking on permanent responsibilities like that. that's why I'm apprehensive about a lot of decisions I make sometimes
I understand what you're saying though, it's scary taking on permanent responsibilities like that. that's why I'm apprehensive about a lot of decisions I make sometimes

It is partially true.
Society-wise it is always better to do something that many other ppl do, so you wont feel 'alone' or 'strange'.
Imo for ppl who experienced trauma it is better to do the things that make them feel well. If having a child makes you feel better, just do it. The real problem, that not everyone seems to understand, is that even when you do what you like to do, for example getting a specific job or 'having a child', you don't know from the start who you'll meet on the road and that can cause even more trauma. Imagine having a child with an ass**le or that your passion leads you to a career path full of bad ppl.
But life is like this, unpredictable and full of emotions, good or bad ones.

 

[Suicidebydeath]

I see people talk about wanting children, and I don't understand. Why would you *want* to take on responsibilities? I don't want any at all. For me, the less responsibilities, the better. I don't want to be responsible for anything or anyone

People might want kids for selfish reasons.

I can understand what you mean, responsibilities can be stressful. So I don't know why, I would want to adopt someone to make their life better, why I want to increase my responsibilities I have no idea honestly.

Likewise, if I could have had my own kids, I guess it would be nice to pass on my genes. I'm pretty smart, maybe they could do some good. There's no way to know for sure.

 

[sserafim]

I don't understand it either. I hate responsibility from the bottom of my heart.
But when it comes to having children, it all comes down to our evolution and nothing else. People want to feel useful to society and luckily I'm not like them. The point is, if more people were like me, we wouldn't exist as a species.
At least that's how I see it ;3

TW: NSFW

I want to get creampied and bred, but I don't actually want to get pregnant irl or have children. I don't want to have to take care of anyone. I don't want to nor care about feeling useful to society either. I don't owe society anything

I've heard that people can't function without responsibilities in their lives. I've heard this specifically about men, but I'm pretty sure it's not gender-specific. I know that getting a dog would make me not to commit, because I would live for him and cherish every moment together, unable to leave him for fear he would think I abandoned him.

I'm smart enough to avoid it, but I understand the concept. It provides structure and purpose, these are good things.

I'm a NEET right now. I don't have any responsibilities, and I love it. I don't want to have to work for a living, be independent or support myself. In fact, the looming threat of being forced to have responsibilities is making me contemplate suicide. I want to retain my freedom and not be chained to responsibilities. I can function just fine without responsibilities in my life. I don't understand why most people can't function without them

 

[Suicidebydeath]

TW: NSFW

I want to get creampied and bred, but I don't actually want to get pregnant irl or have children. I don't want to have to take care of anyone

Rip your inbox. That's just a fetish though, I don't think it's related.

 

[sserafim]

Different strokes for different folks, I guess. I do contract work, and there's a huge difference in my mood when I'm just sitting around on my butt compared to when I'm actually doing something meaningful and see that it makes other people happy. I don't know, I think for me the more responsibilities the better for my mental health, the most damaging thing for me is to feel useless.

But hey, if you love NEETing, no judgement from me, sounds nice actually But don't you feel you are then more responsible for your everyday life? If there's no outside structure?

I don't feel useless and I don't want to be "useful". If I'm "useful", then someone else is just using me (for their own gain), or I'm just human capital for capitalism and society. I also don't like structure. I feel like it's confining and limiting. I want to have freedom to do whatever I want. Right now I have absolute freedom, and I love it. I don't want to work for a living. For me, it's NEET or rope. I don't want to have to do things that I don't want to. I don't want any responsibilities or obligations. NEETdom is the way for me

 

[willitpass]

It is partially true.
Society-wise it is always better to do something that many other ppl do, so you wont feel 'alone' or 'strange'.
Imo for ppl who experienced trauma it is better to do the things that make them feel well. If having a child makes you feel better, just do it. The real problem, that not everyone seems to understand, is that even when you do what you like to do, for example getting a specific job or 'having a child', you don't know from the start who you'll meet on the road and that can cause even more trauma. Imagine having a child with an ass**le or that your passion leads you to a career path full of bad ppl.
But life is like this, unpredictable and full of emotions, good or bad ones.

Anything in life can lead to bad experiences. Avoiding all responsibilities for fear of maybe encountering bad experiences is just living in fear. It could lead to bad experiences, or it could lead to the best experiences of your entire life. If it does go south, then there are always ways to either change things or make an out. I'd rather take the risk and potentially find the reward. If it goes wrong then there are options. If you never start then there are no benefits.

 

[sickgirlzis]

Anything in life can lead to bad experiences. Avoiding all responsibilities for fear of maybe encountering bad experiences is just living in fear. It could lead to bad experiences, or it could lead to the best experiences of your entire life. If it does go south, then there are always ways to either change things or make an out. I'd rather take the risk and potentially find the reward. If it goes wrong then there are options. If you never start then there are no benefits.

agree with this heavily. you can't live in fear. you gotta step out of your comfort zone sometimes. bad things will happen even when u have no responsibilities so just fuck it and go out and make ur life spicy or somethin.

 

[CharAznable54]

I see people talk about wanting children, and I don't understand. Why would you *want* to take on responsibilities? I don't want any at all. For me, the less responsibilities, the better. I don't want to be responsible for anything or anyone

For a lot of parents, their world and mindset completely changed when they had their first child. Like something clicked that's indescribable, which makes them want to take on the responsibility and to love their firstborn. It's an interesting thing.
For people saying they want kids, I guess they want that experience. They're kind and stable enough to want to raise someone and care for them. They would probably also be less lonely.
We're also a species that needs to reproduce to survive. Nobody who wants kids really thinks about that, but it is a big factor. But there's too many people on this earth anyways so... meh.

 

[sserafim]

agree with this heavily. you can't live in fear. you gotta step out of your comfort zone sometimes. bad things will happen even when u have no responsibilities so just fuck it and go out and make ur life spicy or somethin.

It's not out of fear; it's just that I don't see the point of taking on responsibilities

Anything in life can lead to bad experiences. Avoiding all responsibilities for fear of maybe encountering bad experiences is just living in fear. It could lead to bad experiences, or it could lead to the best experiences of your entire life. If it does go south, then there are always ways to either change things or make an out. I'd rather take the risk and potentially find the reward. If it goes wrong then there are options. If you never start then there are no benefits.

I avoid responsibilities because I just don't want them. I don't see any reason to take on responsibilities

 

[tbroken]

Anything in life can lead to bad experiences. Avoiding all responsibilities for fear of maybe encountering bad experiences is just living in fear. It could lead to bad experiences, or it could lead to the best experiences of your entire life. If it does go south, then there are always ways to either change things or make an out. I'd rather take the risk and potentially find the reward. If it goes wrong then there are options. If you never start then there are no benefits.

agree with this heavily. you can't live in fear. you gotta step out of your comfort zone sometimes. bad things will happen even when u have no responsibilities so just fuck it and go out and make ur life spicy or somethin.

I totally agree with you. Even if there are more indispensable resources like water and food, we are here for example because we have a smartphone/computer and internet connection, that we are paying either with our own salary or parents money. So we earned the possibility to speak on this forum somehow, it is not something granted.
But if we ended up on this forum it is for one or more specific reason, which i would not call 'fear'. It is more awareness in my case, awareness that things can go well, but they can even become worst. I talk by experience, because my CPTSD made me do a lot of things, some good ones and some really stupid.

 

[Dr Iron Arc]

For me, responsibilities to others are much easier to manage than responsibilities to myself. As the oldest child and only male in my family I've always had to take on extra responsibilities for my two younger sisters even the normal one has often needed me to help her with things and she's 26. When I was in Taiwan a few weeks ago I was also responsible for babysitting my 12 year old cousin a lot but he wasn't too bad so there was a small bit of satisfaction and pride from feeling like I helped someone's life be better than mine.

That said, when it comes to my special needs sister, she can be a bit much and I'm still dealing with the burnout from having to help assist her everyday. I agree that the responsibility can become too overwhelming to ever seem worth it especially for someone who's not even my own child so why should I care? Sometimes I think I only stick around to help her because she enabled me to live an easy life thanks to money from the government but I was still rotting away at home and wasted three years of my life on her so eventually I got desperate enough to take on a part time retail job just so I could be away from her more.

I don't know why but it all still feels easier for me to do than have to take responsibility for my own life. Day to day procedures like hygiene and such are the real drags on living for me. Taking care of others just feels like a nice distraction but maybe I wouldn't know true suffering until I have to be responsible in a much bigger way.

 

[EvisceratedJester]

I want to get creampied and bred, but I don't actually want to get pregnant irl or have children.

Jesus Christ, we get that pregnancy doesn't appeal to you but you didn't need to mention all of this!

Spoiler: ...

Though, this also sadly applies to me too, lol

 

[Unknown21]

More responsibilities mean more distraction from life. Most people see their responsibilities as their goal in life. For example, having children. Sometimes the goal is to raise them and spend on them as the goal of life. But frankly, I see this as stupidity, because responsibilities and problems never give life meaning, they are only distractions and nothing more.

 

[greebo6]

I suppose having responsibilities and living up to them , taking responsibilities on and making a good job of it all gives a person a sense of accomplishment and achievement.
This would make you feel good about yourself which in turn is better for your mental health.
Helps raise or maintain self esteem perhaps.
I have always generally failed at responsibility and it hasn't helped my dismally , but deserved , low self esteem.

 

[Abyssal]

I want people to love me. If I'm no use to them they wouldn't love me.

 

[thenamingofcats]

It's not that they go out seeking responsibilities, but more that responsibility comes with things in life they want like kids, career, etc.

 

[EvisceratedJester]

It's not that they go out seeking responsibilities, but more that responsibility comes with things in life they want like kids, career, etc.

Deciding to have kids would literally be an example of seeking out responsibility.

 

[sserafim]

But frankly, I see this as stupidity, because responsibilities and problems never give life meaning, they are only distractions and nothing more.

Same. They also make your life unnecessarily harder. I don't know why you would willingly take more things onto your plate. I want to have the easiest life possible and make my life as easy as possible

 

[MatrixPrisoner]

The saying "do what you like for a living, and you'll never work a day in your life" get tossed around a lot.

Unfortunately, if everyone was able to do that, society would implode. I get to experience that to some extent. There are some aspects of being a sushi chef that I enjoy. The artistic aspect. Putting together But nothing nearly enough to want to put up with the stress of being in the weeds, unruly customers, worthless co-workers, being OCD and sterile with my workspace, etc. All those things make me want to die.

I 100% understand why you don't want to work. But I always have the hope that you eventually become one of the people that somehow stumbles upon an opportunity to do what you like for a living. If there is even anything that you like. You seem really smart and educated and seem like someone that would be a top performer.

 

[sserafim]

The saying "do what you like for a living, and you'll never work a day in your life" get tossed around a lot.

Unfortunately, if everyone was able to do that, society would implode. I get to experience that to some extent. There are some aspects of being a sushi chef that I enjoy. The artistic aspect. Putting together But nothing nearly enough to want to put up with the stress of being in the weeds, unruly customers, worthless co-workers, being OCD and sterile with my workspace, etc. All those things make me want to die.

I 100% understand why you don't want to work. But I always have the hope that you eventually become one of the people that somehow stumbles upon an opportunity to do what you like for a living. If there is even anything that you like. You seem really smart and educated and seem like someone that would be a top performer.

I have degree in the science part of STEM from a top college, but I like music and singing. I think that making your passion your job would make you lose your spark for it though. You would just view it as an obligation rather than something you do for enjoyment and fun. I don't want to have to work for a living. I don't want to become yet another slave to capitalism. I don't want to live in survival mode and struggle to survive

 

[divinemistress36]

I don't feel useless and I don't want to be "useful". If I'm "useful", then someone else is just using me (for their own gain), or I'm just human capital for capitalism and society. I also don't like structure. I feel like it's confining and limiting. I want to have freedom to do whatever I want. Right now I have absolute freedom, and I love it. I don't want to work for a living. For me, it's NEET or rope. I don't want to have to do things that I don't want to. I don't want any responsibilities or obligations. NEETdom is the way for me

NEET dominatrix? Lol

 

[sserafim]

NEET dominatrix? Lol

Lol NEETdom as in kingdom. The other term is NEEThood, like childhood

 

[MatrixPrisoner]

I have degree in the science part of STEM from a top college, but I like music and singing. I think that making your passion your job would make you lose your spark for it though. You would just view it as an obligation rather than something you do for enjoyment and fun. I don't want to have to work for a living. I don't want to become yet another slave to capitalism. I don't want to live in survival mode and struggle to survive

Yes, I have also been told by many people to never to do what you like for a living, because you can easily end up not liking it. I'm just merely suggesting a best possible scenario for all of us being forced by survival instinct to live. Of course death is the most ideal thing that can happen.

NEET dominatrix? Lol

2x platinum-selling NEET dominatrix.

NEET dominatrix? Lol

2x platinum-selling NEET dominatrix.

 

[Eudaimonic]

Apart from the responsibilities that are necessary for them to survive and function in society, it gives them a sense of fulfillment and meaning.
I don't get it either since I don't desire to "play the game," so to speak.