Why do people make someone else's suicide about themselves?

[Ambivalent1]

It's mindbobbling.

 

[Dead Ghost]

I don't know anyone who does.. unless you mean the media or social networks. But in real life, since I was a kid, this is just a topic to pass the time while you're bored or waiting for someone (unless it directly affects you).

//

No cónec ningú que ho faci.. sino es que et refereixes als mitjans de comunicació o les xarxes socials. Però a la vida real, desde que era petit, això només és un tema per passar l'estona mentre's t'aburreixes o esperes algú (sinó es que t'afecta directament a tú).

 

[Forever Sleep]

I guess we all try to relate to one another to an extent. People here try to relate to one another in an empathetic way. No one elses plans here are my business as such but as someone who also has those feelings- I can relate.

I guess maybe the more militant pro-lifers out there sympathise with the people left behind- especially parents- and they look for someone else to blame. So- suicide becomes a wider social issue- why did my child have access to this information or substance? (Nevermind why they felt like that in the first place- they seem to think prevention is enough...)

 

[PinkMeow]

I honestly have no idea. When I talk about that I want to die everyone is saying "No! It will hurt so much when you are gone and I the guilt will eat me.." but when I call crying, feeling so much pain they can't talk rn and are busy

 

[FuneralCry]

Because humans are very self centred after all, and they cannot emphasise with the person who has left this world, instead it's all about those left behind and how they feel. The selfishness of humans is shown by pro-lifers who try and stop the people they know from ctb, interfering when they shouldn't have any right to do so, because after all they don't want to lose the person for their own benefit, if they were truly caring and compassionate they would accept suicide as a valid option, nobody should be forced to suffer in this world against their wishes.

 

[Sad Avocado]

Because if they know directly the person who committed, they tend to think that they could have done more, they could have done something to help them, but the harsh reality is that a person that ctbs tried every possible way before doing that. I mean suicide is never the first option in the mind of anyone but rather the last (unless they are affected from some mental illness). I am in the same situation right now, and I seriously want to ctb but I am worried of the damage I will leave behind because I know that my family and friends love me so much that they will surely find a way to feel guilty for my actions. The closer people are to you, the more sense of guilt they will have in the end. And that's why I know what I have to do but I don't know if I have the strength to do it.

 

[Goodgirlryeo101]

I definitely think that MAID should be made legal everywhere in the world…. People should have the freedom to complete ctb whenever they want… I think this will be so so easy for anyone who wants to complete ctb…. I'm never going to tell anyone in real life when I'm planning on completing my ctb because they will try to stop you for their own selfish interest ( they want their punching bag to continue living so they can continue to torment you ) Each passing second or minute seems to be dragging, time is moving slowly for my liking….. music is the only thing keeping me sane…. My heroes are Caroline Flack, Sophie Gradon, Sulli, Goo Hara, Ashley Lovelace and Cheslie Kryst ( as they all completed ctb successfully )

 

[Sweet Tart]

Ugh this makes me think of my mother, who is quite narcissistic and emotionally abusive but sees herself as an angelic martyr figure. I fear she would feed off the sympathy for the rest of her life if I go thru with it.

 

[Little_Suzy]

Ugh this makes me think of my mother, who is quite narcissistic and emotionally abusive but sees herself as an angelic martyr figure. I fear she would feed off the sympathy for the rest of her life if I go thru with it.

Yep! In such an environment, narcissists and histrionics thrive.

You are not alone! My husband is a wonderful man; nonetheless, after losing his young wife to refractory depression, he would happily accept your condolences.

Human behavior is intriguing in its predictability. I find it amusing how individuals can take advantage of both happy and sad situations.

 

[Worndown]

I do not want to defend them, but most people have zero ability to cope with this subject. The concept is so far outside "their box" that they go another direction. It becomes your impact on them.

 

[Rob1984]

I don't think it's actually very surprising when you consider some of the biology involved. Humans are biologically wired as a unit. We thrive in pairs and groups. There are countless studies that show humans that are isolated end up deteriorating (first mentally, then physically). We literally depend on connection. This site is actually proof of that, where we are all looking for connection, understanding, empathy, etc. from other humans. Anyone who participates on this site cannot claim they are 100% alone in this world, since they are still, on some level, interacting with other people. It's true that positive online friendships are not equal to positive in-person friendships, but the former is still absolutely better than nothing. If it wasn't better than nothing, then lonely people wouldn't even bother spending time chatting on this site. The reason I say all of this is because this human connection is a two way street. We depend on others for our well-being, and others depend on us. When someone dies, whether by suicide or not, it psychologically hurts us because our human web of connection has been damaged. We can't help that, it's in our DNA. Just because we have our own lives and we are individual people, doesn't mean we are purely independent and exist in a vacuum. We are still, on some level, part of a unit, whether we like to admit it or not. That's why others have self-interest in our deaths.

 

[Kerrtu]

I have a "friend" from childhood who still makes things that happen to me all about him. He went so far as to make a blog following my activities when I moved away. I told him to take it down and what did he do? Removed any pics of himself, left the pics of me, and thought I'd be fine with it. I had to ask him repeatedly to remove the blog altogether and he finally did but damn, it was like pulling teeth.

Why do people do things like this? They live vicariously through the person they are fixated on. They don't really see the person, they see themselves as the person. Or extension of the person at least.

Childhood "friend" recently emailed me birthday wishes and if I had one more wish, it would be to not have read the email. Absolutely void of any real connection, fake sounding and very hung up on me turning 40, as if my life is over now because 40 is what? Elderly? Currently have a draft of an email I want to send though it comes off in beast mode. Maybe when I feel less incensed, I'll reword some things and send it.

I don't want him throwing a FB funeral for me when I successfully CTB. I don't want to end up on his his IG. Or another obscure blog…

No more.