Discussion Who makes you want to CTB/your reasons to CTB?

[NormallyNeurotic]

Companion poll to this one in Recovery about who makes you want to stay alive. I noticed that so many people there picked "family" and it initially suprised me because I had noticed how many people seemed to be estranged from or have a lack/loss of family... but then it hit me and I felt SO STUPID. I usually see that more often on the CTB side of this site. That inspired me to do this to test and see the differences in support/connection in those wanting to CTB on here versus those recovering, of course with people in the middle included. Feel free to do a tier list after joining the poll!


My tier list:

1. Myself (& some of sys)
Self explanatory!

2. Unsupportive/abusive/neglectful family member(s)
Unsupportive extended family... and some other shit going on with my parents and me that honestly hurts more

3. Future loss of pet & future loss of family member(s)
Chronically ill and elderly cat that I raised since a kitten. Also future loss of two very accepting elderly family members

4. (Possibly) unrequited crush
This is so low because I still want to make him happy even if he doesn't like me that way. I don't know if he does, or ever will (but he probably doesn't and won't ever) so once he gets a long-term partner and is fully happy I might consider CTB

 

[TANETS]

People in general. Sometimes I feel like its a bit cliché to say it, but people truly scare me. Knowing the capacity of how evil people can be is enough for me to not want anything to do with this world.

genocides, massacres, enslavement. amongst other things. turning on the news is dreadful. i watched someone harass a child online year old and threaten to r*pe them on a game I was playing. Seeing that is enough to make me just wanna die.