GreenBanana23

GreenBanana23

Suicidal Banana
Mar 5, 2023
78
In your lives, what constitutes "enough " in terms of finally being the last straw before ctb? I keep going "time to ctb" but then changing my mind, making it harder. Nobody there for me really? Ctb. Nvm! Existence is purely a figment of our imagination? Ctb. Nvm! When does it all stop being a "nvm" and fully become a CTB???
What are your goalposts that you move farther or closer?
 
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Forever Sleep

Earned it we have...
May 4, 2022
9,539
I feel like I've already done enough in life to feel confident I've had enough and, don't want to do anymore. I'm carrying on more out of obligation because I don't want my Dad to have to go through my suicide. I expect fear of actually attempting will end up getting in the way too.

I think you need to have hope that things could be better. That they'll be worth the (enormous) effort you put in. Otherwise- what motivates us to try?

I've tried enough in life to feel like the end result wasn't worth the effort in most cases. In my experience: Careers and wage slave jobs are stressful and exploitative. Friendship can be massively unreliable. Most things cost money which you need to earn in a career or wage slave job- see above.

Maybe it's just me but, the overall balance to life seems skewed in order that- if you're enjoying something, chances are- it's a quick fix and it will more likely harm you in the long run- comfort food, alcohol, drugs, too much time spent on hobbies etc. I tend to hate a lot of the stuff that's good for us!
 
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Chrysalis

Chrysalis

Member
Aug 11, 2024
14
I've had dates and conditions in the past, just like you, but it's hard and I never actually managed to do it either. At this point I'm just trying to have the means to die directly accessible to me at all times, and then hoping that random fluctuations in mood and outlook will bring me low enough one day to overcome SI on impulse.

If there is one last straw however, it would be when my parents can not/do not want to sustain my existence any longer probably (but preferably before that). Being able to be a living dead NEET is my one saving grace, and I can not imagine experiencing no joy in life while also having to work on top of that, toiling away for the "reward" of sustaining a life that you do not care for. My condolences to anyone who is trapped like that but unable to die.
 
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Praestat_Mori

Mori praestat, quam haec pati!
May 21, 2023
11,359
"Enough is enough" is just a platitude. Unfortunately, we humans can endure so much more pain and suffering. That's why usuyll it doesn't work if we make our own situations worse in the hope to beat SI this way.
 
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FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
38,541
For me personally under no circumstances would I wish to suffer in this cruel, futile existence, to me human existence was always a deeply undesirable burden in the first place, if I had the option to painlessly free myself from this existence I would have ceased existing a while ago but of course I never should have existed at all, simply just existing is enough to make me wish to never exist again. To me existence just feels like a terrible, tragic mistake that just causes so much harm and suffering all for the sake of it, only in non-existence will I be unable to suffer which is why it's all I wish for, I'd always prefer to painlessly die than be burdened with this existence just to be tortured by old age and die anyway, existence itself will always feel like the problem for me, I have no interest in suffering in this existence.
 
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ijustwishtodie

ijustwishtodie

death will be my ultimate bliss
Oct 29, 2023
4,964
Enough is enough when the individual says that it's enough
 
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