When help doesn't help

[torimandy]

I just spent 3 hours in suicide chat. I was trying to get help with the issues I have so I could remove then need to complete this time. I guess I am frustrated as my order materials have not shown up yet. Well all that was offered to me were internet inks I have already been at. and every time we couldn't find a solution to a problem there was an attempt to distract was interjected and then a new idea and web link Ive already been too inserted.

Why can't they just admit they can't help and bless your solution? I feel as if I was being talked down to like a 3rd grader and when I left all I had was sore fingers from angry typing. I am a piece of shit of a human being. As such rather than help they condescend. I hope mail is forthcoming so I can end this once and for all.

 

[RedDEE]

We have a suicide chat here =)

 

[GoodPersonEffed]

What are the issues? Maybe someone here would have more helpful input.

 

[esse_est_percipi]

3 hours in suicide chat

you mean a helpline or something?

Well all that was offered to me were internet inks I have already been at. and every time we couldn't find a solution to a problem there was an attempt to distract was interjected and then a new idea and web link Ive already been too inserted.

Yes this is the experience of a lot of people.

Many people feel ignored and dismissed as soon as they try to get to the heart of the problems and issues they have concerning life, meaning, death etc.
The people on the other end of these helplines are usually not philosophers and they probably have their own reasons for avoiding difficult conversations, as well as the fact that their job is a function of a pro-life social mentality.

Giving suicidal people links to web addresses is like giving paracetamol to someone with a brain tumor.

 

[Deleted member 17949]

The sad reality is that most available help requires a lot of energy to engage with, which many of us just don't have. The resources people try to give us are valid for some people that are struggling but do really want to live and are somewhat happy, but for people that feel completely defeated and spend every day with no energy and no will to live these resources are just frustrating. We will only end up clashing with advice that we are unable or unwilling to take and feeling offended when people continue to say that there is help when we can't really use it.

 

[torimandy]

What are the issues? Maybe someone here would have more helpful input.

Issue one: Drivers license. To get it back I have to buy a car, then register it. To register it requires insurance. Alone I will cost me 4000 a month. With a partner about 100. So I jumped back on to dating sites to find a potential partner. Only to find now there is no interest in me unless I have confirming surgeries on my face.

Well, thats all too hard alone. It's all a chicken and egg, catch 22 bunch of shit.

Being trans I was disowned by my family. Family could help but refuses to speak to me for 10 years now.

I have order Everything I need to just pass peacfully, but the postal service is so far behind who knows if and when they will ever get here.

 

[pole]

hey, sorry to hear that you didnt receive what you were looking for when trying to get help.

to me, help is someone just being there and hearing me out and choosing to want to understand and listen to me in an empathetic manner.

however, this really isnt the case for alot of instances. alot of people push to find a solution to our problems or have an approach to want to fix the problems we speak about, instead of really just hearing us out. i think for me personally, i'd rather be heard out and understood and listened to by someone in a genuine manner rather than someone assuming that my problems are just something relatively minor with an easy solution.

to me, i wish they'd rather have spoken to you in more of an empathetic manner before rushing to any sort of solutions and pushing links. even if you weren't implying that you wanted to vent about anything, everyone has their reasons and people stumble onto suicide chats and such for a reason and i guess hearing a person out before simply pushing to want to fix is just abit of "positive toxicity". just my opinion i guess.

regardless, i hope you feel better and find peace through whatever you choose to do.

take care.