What's your past unsuccessful CTB's?

[tvo]

What are your past unsuccessful CTB attempts?

I attempted to self terminate using chloroform, a surgical mask and a plastic bag. The suffocation, choking on that chemical was horrific, I was fully conscious the entire time. I was quite sick the next day from inhaling the chloroform.

My next one was with an exit bag and an over dose on benzos. I lost consciousness within seconds and remember waking up the next day with the plastic bag next to me. I believe my failure with this method was dew to not taking a strong alcohol to increase the potency of the drugs, fortunately I was out the entire process (no psychological aftermath).

 

[Vicolo cieco]

Sometimes I cock my handgun and put it to my head, but I can never gather the courage to pull the trigger.

 

[EvisceratedJester]

First one: tried to use a knife to cut an artey but it was too dull and it couldn't even cut through my skin, lol

Second one: Tried ODing but it just made me drowsy

Third one: Happened not too long after the second attempt. I tried ODing again but I increased the dosage. After several hours I finally accepted that I likely wasn't going to die and ended up going to the hospital.

Fourth one: A few months back I tried hanging myself several times. I first used a belt and, a few days later, I bought some rope and tried several times again.

As you can see, my attempts are kind of pathetic. I'm bad at most things, so it's no surprise that I'm also bad at killing myself.

 

[Demian]

1 - Phenobarbital (I don't know, but it was a very small, non-fatal dose)
2 - Phenobarbital (2 or 3 grams)
3 - Morphine 3g + Phenobarbital 21g

 

[Forveleth]

I attempted to self terminate using chloroform, a surgical mask and a plastic bag.

Aye! I tried something similar. My plan was to suffocate using a mask that cut off all air. It was stuffed with a chloroform soaked rag to prevent SI. Woke up puking on the floor after tearing off the mask while unconscious.

quite sick the next day from inhaling the chloroform.

I puked the rest of the day and then had vertigo for a few days afterwards. Also now immediately feel ill if I smell chloroform.

 

[Metalhead]

OD - 10 days in a coma.
Partial hanging

 

[anxiousalpaca]

1 - Phenobarbital (I don't know, but it was a very small, non-fatal dose)
2 - Phenobarbital (2 or 3 grams)
3 - Morphine 3g + Phenobarbital 21g

You survived 21g of phenobarbital??? Wow.

 

[ferrie]

My first attempt was VSED as a teenager that kept landing me in the ER. Spread out over about a year and a half where like once a month of so I'd collapse from dehydration.
Second attempt was at 19. I stockpiled six months worth of Topamax without actually looking into the toxicity of it. I was talked out of taking it by an online friend's mother & disposed of the medication.
Third attempt was at 23 this past March. I took about 2g each of Visteril and Zoloft. The Zoloft made me vomit & I was caught & taken to the hospital

 

[Demian]

You survived 21g of phenobarbital??? Wow.

Phenobarbital wasn't even the biggest problem, as 21 grams is twice the fatal dose. 3 grams of morphine is 6 to 12 times the fatal dose.

 

[anxiousalpaca]

Phenobarbital wasn't even the biggest problem, as 21 grams is twice the fatal dose. 3 grams of morphine is 6 to 12 times the fatal dose.

So how come you survived it? Care to elaborate? Apologies if I am asking insensitive questions.

 

[thetruetato]

What are your past unsuccessful CTB attempts?

I attempted to self terminate using chloroform, a surgical mask and a plastic bag. The suffocation, choking on that chemical was horrific, I was fully conscious the entire time. I was quite sick the next day from inhaling the chloroform.

My next one was with an exit bag and an over dose on benzos. I lost consciousness within seconds and remember waking up the next day with the plastic bag next to me. I believe my failure with this method was dew to not taking a strong alcohol to increase the potency of the drugs, fortunately I was out the entire process (no psychological aftermath).

I've honestly lost track of how many times I've attempted, but I have tried hanging, overdosing, slitting my wrists, and the night-night method.

 

[tomthemouse1]

Sometimes I cock my handgun and put it to my head, but I can never gather the courage to pull the trigger.

Same goes to me but when I try to jump from a high place I can't muster the courage to actually take a single step forward. I feel like I am a failure at everything even at offing myself

 

[Yeet_Me_Away]

Hanging. Don't know how the fuck I got out and woke up on the floor with a sprained ankle - swear to God it was some miracle shit

 

[ARW3N]

Overdosed on paracetamol but I vomited most of it up which considerably reduced its toxicity. Took cyanide which I had extracted from apricot kernals. Unfortunately, it wasn't potent enough to kill me. Had a convulsion and survived. They were serious attempts rather than half-hearted parasuicide attempts with no intention of surviving which left me frustrated. I certainly didn't feel like it's a miracle that I survived the attempts.

 

[Callie Arcale]

Overdosed on paracetamol but I vomited most of it up which considerably reduced its toxicity. Took cyanide which I had extracted from apricot kernals. Unfortunately, it wasn't potent enough to kill me. Had a convulsion and survived. They were serious attempts rather than half-hearted parasuicide attempts with no intention of surviving which left me frustrated. I certainly didn't feel like it's a miracle that I survived the attempts.

How did you extract cyanide from the pits? I had the same idea with apple seeds, but the quantity of apples needed would have been astronomical.

 

[Demian]

So how come you survived it? Care to elaborate? Apologies if I am asking insensitive questions.

Feel free to ask.

NOTE: I don't use morphine and phenobarbital or any of the drugs in their class, so I have no tolerance to them.

I ingested all the pills while kneeling in a bathtub full of water so that, after losing consciousness, I would drown, which is much quicker, and if I didn't die (if someone found me) I would die from an overdose of phenobarbital and morphine.

But what happened was: I took the drugs, knelt down and waited for 2 minutes, 5 minutes, 10 minutes and I didn't lose consciousness (I had read that it would take 2 to 5 minutes). I panicked and called for help, unfortunately. I went to hospital and ended up in the deepest coma (Glasgow 3) and here I am again.

 

[Red Moon]

Hanging and overdose, I was expecting to die from the overdose but no I survived and I'm still here.

I would buy a gun and get it over with but they're banned.

 

[ARW3N]

How did you extract cyanide from the pits? I had the same idea with apple seeds, but the quantity of apples needed would have been astronomical.

Yes, you're right that it would require an astronomical amount of apricot kernels or apple seeds. I crushed the apricot kernels in a litre bottle of water, which most probably diluted the toxicity of the cyanide. I gulped down the whole litre bottle of cyanide and was completely baffled when absolutely nothing happened! I fell out of bed a few hours later with a convulsion. Interestingly, sleep reduces your oxygen intake which is a clue that I did indeed experience mild cyanide poisoning but it just wasn't strong enough to knock me completely dead. It's very frustrating because it was a very serious attempt and I abandoned this whole method in the end as a way to CTB.

 

[YosemiteGrrl]

OD - 10 days in a coma.
Partial hanging

10 days in a coma?!! What did you use?

 

[ImTelling]

What are your past unsuccessful CTB attempts?

I attempted to self terminate using chloroform, a surgical mask and a plastic bag. The suffocation, choking on that chemical was horrific, I was fully conscious the entire time. I was quite sick the next day from inhaling the chloroform.

My next one was with an exit bag and an over dose on benzos. I lost consciousness within seconds and remember waking up the next day with the plastic bag next to me. I believe my failure with this method was dew to not taking a strong alcohol to increase the potency of the drugs, fortunately I was out the entire process (no psychological aftermath).

Tried doing the exit mask method but I fucked up buying the helium as it didn't have a pressure valve so it was on full blast and had to be held down. I didn't want to injure my lungs so I aborted. My family found out, institutionalized and after a year I became homeless.

 

[poilala1]

I jumped from a seven story building but survived.

 

[aidic]

Many ODs, hanging, passing out inside a car during the peak summer heat, drowning. Two attempts were almost successful. Survival instinct is a bitch

 

[piddincir]

One with helium and exit bag, but I didn't tape the hose to the inside of the bag. So passed out but woke up 15-20 mins lasted and the hose was out of the bag , I really regret that one.

Second two was with my exit back and a lot of booze and Xanax , both times woke up with the bag on the floor. Both those times I don't remember a good 24 hours of time, I sent out delayed emails they got sent and delivered and was out cold for about 12 hours . Not the one.

But as Edison said about creating the light bulb , "I didn't fail 1,000 times. The light bulb was an invention with 1,000 steps."

Next time I am gone

 

[Immensevoid]

My mum stopped me from jumping last month

 

[tvo]

I jumped from a seven story building but survived.

What! OMG, I have so many questions: like, what did you land on, what injuries did you sustain? Did you loose consciousness?

I survived a horrific fatal car crash and sustained multiple fractures, the physical pain was beyond mind blowing; seven years later I am still in pain.

One with helium and exit bag, but I didn't tape the hose to the inside of the bag. So passed out but woke up 15-20 mins lasted and the hose was out of the bag , I really regret that one.

Second two was with my exit back and a lot of booze and Xanax , both times woke up with the bag on the floor. Both those times I don't remember a good 24 hours of time, I sent out delayed emails they got sent and delivered and was out cold for about 12 hours . Not the one.

But as Edison said about creating the light bulb , "I didn't fail 1,000 times. The light bulb was an invention with 1,000 steps."

Next time I am gone

You added booze with your exit bag method and still failed. I was so convinced that I failed with this method because of the absence of alcohol. I woke up 18 hours later with slurred speech, confusion, extreme dizziness and blurred vision.

 

[Coconut blue]

I tried strangling myself with a cord for some electronic appliance when I was in second grade… you alr know how well that worked

 

[A_good_username]

I tried to drown myself in my bathtub when I was like 13,super embarrassed that I didn't know that wouldn't work lmao
I tried to drown myself in my bathtub when I was like 13,super embarrassed that I didn't know that wouldn't work lmao
I tried to drown myself in my bathtub when I was like 13,super embarrassed that I didn't know that wouldn't work lmao

 

[TheUnkn0wn]

Partial hanging.

My next options are VSED or fet

 

[poilala1]

What! OMG, I have so many questions: like, what did you land on, what injuries did you sustain? Did you loose consciousness?

I survived a horrific fatal car crash and sustained multiple fractures, the physical pain was beyond mind blowing; seven years later I am still in pain.

I'm sorry you're in pain from that. Is that a reason for you wanting to ctb?

As for my fall, the impact was on gravel I believe (not sure though) next to the carpark I jumped from. I have no memory of the fall or any pain. Only remember going over the ledge.
I have little memory of the intensive care, too. I broke many bones, left clavicle, left shoulder, left arm, ribs, my pelvis I believe, the left foot. My arm is still being operated on. I also tore my aorta and a prosthesis was installed that my aorta is supposed to regrow around which I only learnt about recently. Luckily barely had any pain (thanks to plenty of painkillers that I hallucinated on aswell) and have no pain at all now despite it all.
By the way, technically I fell 8 stories down because I landed on a lower level below the entrance.

 

[tsumihoroboshi]

ohhhh it's embarrassing, these attempts i've made. i mentioned in other threads i think but i remembered something.

first we have trying to walk into traffic. i lived in the boonies at the time so. not a lot of cars were going by.

an OD attempt with a cocktail of meds i had at the time. i couldn't throw them back up so i just had to sit with those pills in my system for a week and it was miserable.

slit throat attempt with kitchen knife. fail.

another OD attempt with alcohol.

few slit wrists attempts. one accidental that actually scared me because the blood wouldn't stop.

i haven't tried again anything in the last few years cus i'm tired of "attempts".