Whats one thing you wish you could say in a perfect world?

[Iceangel]

So in my pot induced exhaustion I was contemplating stat dosing my sn & meto and kind of went off into my own world and started thinking of someone very dear to me that is no longer really in my life. Ive played thousands of conversations in my head of being competely honest about ctb with that person and it got me thinking - what is something you desperately want to share with someone (close to you or not) that in a perfect world you could? That sharing wouldnt get you ostracized, incarcerated, or some other terrible consequence? What thoughts run through your head that you never utter aloud?

 

[sweet17sour29]

"help me"

 

[LastFlowers]

Too many thoughts to even pin down, some warm, some strange, some horrific... I don't even feel comfortable saying them on this forum. But I'll say this, when I'm gone, there will be endless things unsaid.

 

[ge0rge]

"help me"

heyyyy is that buffalo 66???

 

[sweet17sour29]

heyyyy is that buffalo 66???

Sure is!

 

[ge0rge]

Sure is!

I adore that movie.

 

[Halo13]

Sure is!

Oh wow, no one has ever heard of it when I mention it. Took me forever to find a copy. Really great movie. Christina Ricci is so underrated.

 

[Deleted member 1496]

That I don't really understand this world. I don't understand why I shouldn't have a reaction when someone else initiates an action, and why I should get over everything as if nothing happens. I don't know why I get slaughtered for something minor while others can do something worse and have little consequence. I don't know why having some balance and being middle of the road gets you run over. I don't know how people twist things where I end up being the bad guy, especially for not wanting something I never asked for in the first place. And why my feelings or thoughts matter so little. And if I'm viewed as so wrong or lesser, why people would look down upon or prevent my own death in a world where I don't belong or enjoy.

 

[Pupuce]

"Stop telling me I'm smart and all, then thinking I'm wrong and you are right without even trying to understand me when it suits you"

Too many thoughts to even pin down, some warm, some strange, some horrific... I don't even feel comfortable saying them on this forum. But I'll say this, when I'm gone, there will be endless things unsaid.

Are you sure you don't want to try? That could relieve you, even for a bit

 

[Final Escape]

It would have to be perfect first in order for me to have the response lol!

 

[seekingoblivion]

Honestly, I don't think I'd care to tell anyone anything. I probably wouldn't think there'd be a point for me.

 

[JadedGray]

To be honest, I've told my mother everything. I'm not good at internalizing things like I used to be. I don't have a filter unless I'm in public/around others. There's nothing now that I could say that would surprise her. I wouldn't share these thoughts or beliefs with others because I'm too self-conscious and lack confidence.

 

[stellabelle]

'I want you so badly, I think of you day and night. I think of the future and our conversations. I think of the stupid things we discussed, and I want it - I want all of it.'

 

[silentsinger]

I would say to a member of my family that if he hadn't behaved in the manner in which he did, I would have been able to be there for him. I think in turn if he was different, he would be there for me now, making a difference.

 

[LastFlowers]

"Stop telling me I'm smart and all, then thinking I'm wrong and you are right without even trying to understand me when it suits you"


Are you sure you don't want to try? That could relieve you, even for a bit

Yea I'm sure, it would be the opposite of relief for me.

 

[Deleted member 1768]

So in my pot induced exhaustion I was contemplating stat dosing my sn & meto and kind of went off into my own world and started thinking of someone very dear to me that is no longer really in my life. Ive played thousands of conversations in my head of being competely honest about ctb with that person and it got me thinking - what is something you desperately want to share with someone (close to you or not) that in a perfect world you could? That sharing wouldnt get you ostracized, incarcerated, or some other terrible consequence? What thoughts run through your head that you never utter aloud?

The truth.

Too many thoughts to even pin down, some warm, some strange, some horrific... I don't even feel comfortable saying them on this forum. But I'll say this, when I'm gone, there will be endless things unsaid.

Off topic I know but...I love your pic...smile.

 

[Empty Smile]

 

[Iceangel]

'I want you so badly, I think of you day and night. I think of the future and our conversations. I think of the stupid things we discussed, and I want it - I want all of it.'

I did this (yes Im that sad, cringey, and pathetic...) and let me tell you...its more soul crushing than you can imagine recieving that rejection officially. Your deepest secrets and desires laid bare to the one person in the world you needed to be on your side only to have those hopes and love trampled on cavalierly and cruelly.

While I can understand the frustration of not knowing, once you ask a question or voice a thought theres no taking it back. It requires an action from the other party and in my case it was not the answer I ever wanted.

I hope that helps put your mind at ease, knowing how that what if scenario can play out. Sometimes curiosity really does kill the cat...