What's end when you feel you've reached the end?

[XXXTENTACION]

I personally feel that I've fulfilled any and all of my lifetimes goals... wants.....needs..... achievements or desires.

I got to this point many years ago and have been questioning it for along time. I've had a perfect long term marriage, brought houses coming from a council estate background, a few nice cars, motorbikes, holidays, amazing pets, by no means flash but I'm not struggling.

I find absolutely no joy in anything...I barely leave the house unless it's to buy more rum or collect zanax or all the other benzos I self medicate with.

There is nothing that keeps me here, I have no family or friends.

Thanks for reading.

 

[tears and vomit]

Hey dude, to want to CTB has no requirements, but you have so many opportunities compared to most of us. I really think you should talk to a professional. Friends come and go you can't force it. I know I don't have a say in what you want to do, and being sad isn't a competition, but you really do have a lot of potential to get better.

 

[XXXTENTACION]

I appreciate youre response. Ive tried a few talking therapies and countless medications but my brain just seems to be stuck in my way of thinking after doing it for over 40year so I struggle to listen to these therapists and changing my whole thoughtprocess

 

[Dejected 55]

I've never been in a relationship. I've otherwise reached the point where I've done everything else I want to do. The only things left that I want to do require a partner... and I'll never have a partner... so I've reached the end. So, I identify with your state of mind in that regard.

 

[XXXTENTACION]

It all just seems so pointless to carry on....bored everyday, the same old same old, always lonely, lsot any form of hobbies and can't find new one....what's the point in going through another 30-40 years of misery to ultimately end up dead either way