Discussion What will they say after you ctb?

[Isadeth]

Ideally I would want the few people who would care to just forget that I existed but that most likely wont happen. They'd probably just spew the same cliché bullsh*t that everyone says when someone ctb. Best thing to do would be to spare the niceties and go about with their lives.

I wouldn't want a funeral anyways; just donate everything that can be donated then throw my body in an incinerator and be done with it. No point in wasting time and money on me when I'm already dead.

I hate the cliche talk, but I understand why they do. I'm also an organ donor, and I agree. Take what you can, help someone else, give meaning to my demise and be done with it. Of course donation depends entirely on your method and when you're found. ♡

 

[Chiyuki99]

I think many people will be devastated and seriously hurt by my suicide. And many will also blame themselves. This is what makes it so hard for me to actually go.
I think they will say "what a waste" or "she had her whole future ahead and could have become and be anything she wanted to be" and it's true. My suicide will be a waste.

 

[Isadeth]

Is that good? I think I'm doing them a favour. My mums terrified I'm going to commit suicide. If she knew why it would be a lot worse

Is what good exactly? The pleasantries? Or the mental state?

 

[KleinerWolf]

You're right. Once you're gone will it really matter? Then again, what if you're able to "stick around" and hear them shit talking you? Haha

haha I get what you mean,
but I've told myself many times that if I am to commit suicide it means I don't care about the impact of my suicide on people around me,
whether they understand me or not,

their opinion has no value to me, especially if I'm dead,
I'm an atheist and believe brain-death is the end, but hypothetically speaking if I am to still exist with my consciousness beyond death,
i have better things to do regardless. lol
for that reason I couldn't care less.

 

[Isadeth]

I think many people will be devastated and seriously hurt by my suicide. And many will also blame themselves. This is what makes it so hard for me to actually go.
I think they will say "what a waste" or "she had her whole future ahead and could have become and be anything she wanted to be" and it's true. My suicide will be a waste.

There's plenty of people that struggle with the mindset of knowing others will be devastated, especially those that we love.

If you also believe your suicide will be a waste, maybe, just maybe, you're not there yet?

I don't know your reasons, but I relate to your message. I'm personally waiting, because I want to finish school first and just see if things look up. If they don't I can always get a ticket for the bus. ♡

 

[Mr2005]

Is what good exactly? The pleasantries? Or the mental state?

That they believe what they want even if it isn't true.

 

[next-season .?]

Probably the obligatory "he was a nice person, he'll be missed" but aside from that not an awful lot, because outside of a small friend group and my family I don't speak to anyone. Some people just think of my as a weird creepy guy and will probably just laugh at me and speculate over why I killed myself.

I'll be forgotten by most within a month or two.

same here bro

 

[Good4Nothing]

Only my mom will really care. My friends will probably be shocked and sad for a time, but they'll forget soon enough. They've already forgotten about me. I only get to talk to them when I call them - they don't call me. For the past 2 or 3 months I've been practically begging my best friend to hang out with me - "Hey, man, I could really use a friend right now." He doesn't have time for me.
I'll be forgotten fairly quickly. No one really gives a shit about me.

 

[Isadeth]

That they believe what they want even if it isn't true.

Ah, yeah. They probably will. Of course you won't be there to correct them. If they create a nicer version of the events to make you ctb, is it really that bad? But on the other side of the coin, what if they make it worse? I've seen it countless times. People tend to go for the worst, but hope for the best. Or they try to will themselves for a nicer/more peaceful version.

For example: my husband found his dad after ctb, he was an unattended death by 2 weeks and he was in active putrification (bloat, blisters, a wide range of colors etc.), purge fluids had already been fairly bad, and blood everywhere mixed with the sickly sweet smell. His death wasn't peaceful... not by any means. But me, the State Police/Crime Unit, and the coroner said otherwise for his sake. I will never tell him. He suffers enough.

Maybe that's not what you mean with they'll believe what even if it isn't true, but sometimes it's necessary. Normally in my line of work, I would be very blunt and honest with next of kin, but I couldn't entirely with him. Maybe I should have been blunt like I am with my other calls, maybe the others on scene should have too, but I asked a huge favor since they're my colleagues. It was already a botched scene from an inexperienced officer, I couldn't bear it getting worse for him.

Jeez, I'm sorry for getting kinda in depth and rambling. If I didn't address your comment correctly, please tell me. ♡

Only my mom will really care. My friends will probably be shocked and sad for a time, but they'll forget soon enough. They've already forgotten about me. I only get to talk to them when I call them - they don't call me. For the past 2 or 3 months I've been practically begging my best friend to hang out with me - "Hey, man, I could really use a friend right now." He doesn't have time for me.
I'll be forgotten fairly quickly. No one really gives a shit about me.

I'm sorry your bestfriend hasn't been there for you. Has it been due to the virus? I talk to two people, besides my husband, and for the one I always have to initiate. One is an internet friend I haven't met in person, one is going through her own mess of life. Of course though, who was there anytime she needed anything? Who dropped everything to help or listen? If you ever need someone to talk to or vent to, please don't hesitate to PM me. I know it's not the same as your bestfriend, but I can try. ♡

 

[Good4Nothing]

I'm sorry your bestfriend hasn't been there for you. Has it been due to the virus?

No, it's because he's married and he's a dad now. No one married with kids has time for their single friends.

 

[Isadeth]

No, it's because he's married and he's a dad now. No one married with kids has time for their single friends.

I will admit that marriage and kids is a game changer. It's especially a game changer when it comes to free time. But I still don't find that a plausible excuse to abandon your friends. I am married with kids and I find the time. Even just a simple text goes a long way. I'm sorry your bestfriend did that to you :(

 

[GoodPersonEffed]

Normally in my line of work, I would be very blunt and honest with next of kin, but I couldn't entirely with him.

Not to derail, but I'm curious as to your line of work. If you mentioned it elsewhere, I didn't read it.

My father was a police detective, and when I was very young, became a homicide investigator, so I grew up with an understanding of the perspective of certain professions, hence my interest in yours. (I learned the word autopsy at the dinner table in second grade. I thought it was op-topsy, like an operation! )

 

[Isadeth]

Not to derail, but I'm curious as to your line of work. If you mentioned it elsewhere, I didn't read it.

My father was a police detective, and when I was very young, became a homicide investigator, so I grew up with an understanding of the perspective of certain professions, hence my interest in yours. (I learned the word autopsy at the dinner table in second grade. I thought it was op-topsy, like an operation! )

No problem at all. I'm a deputy coroner, but my degree is in mortuary science and hope to eventually transition into funeral directing lol I've mentioned before being an assistant funeral director, but that ended badly due to the company doing shady practices. :)

 

[ocd is bad]

My family would be really sad, they're really the only reason I don't ctb, it would really hurt them. I don't think anyone else would really care tbh, don't have friends and the aquaintances I do have wouldn't be suprised since I'm not really pinnacle of mental stability. I don't think they'd care since I don't expect to see any of them after the lockdown ends anyway.

 

[Garbage Person]

@Isadeth Sadly, it's not a facetious or derogatory statement. I plan on leaving a message, and a short bio in my thread and I'll likely give my name and location in the chat once I'm locked into my car with the charcoal, mainly so my death can be confirmed. I plan on sending three messages. One to a life long friend that I very rarely see but appreciate. One to the guy I used to live with before this situaton, knew him ten years I believe. The last will go to the dude I just met like two days ago wishing him all the luck in the world. the first two will be bummed, but they won't lose sleep over this. I really am quite the joke and when I say I'm alone, I mean it. The majority of my interactions with people have been here over the last six months. I feel no real connections, just locked out. If I meant something substantial to anyone, maybe they should have clued me in. I don't think anything would really help though. So yeah, I really do think the reaction will be pretty close to what I posted. Its my own fault, I only blame myself. I am truly a garbage person.

 

[draw a circle]

The first response to the news would probably be "why?" Because I'm a talkative, expressive person and some sort of a jokester (mostly snarks and dry humor) so I think nobody had the slightest idea that I have depression tendencies and suicidal. I do joke about it sometimes but what they don't know is that it's not a joke. My friends would probably wonder how did they not see this coming. They would want to be able to prevent it. My parents would be devastated because I'm an only child. There would be a glaring dumbass-shaped hole in my house.

I think most people would be sad (griefing, mourning, etc), but they would also be like "[draw a circle] is so weak, they can't even get through the hardship of life. Why do they even kill themself? Their life is fine, there are people who are much more unfortunate but stronger than them. What a weirdo." I feel like someone would inevitably think like this, at least privately.

 

[CarbonMonoxide]

Well, the wind will blow in a melancholic, breezy manner, the ants will march on in silence. The scavenger birds will circle in the sky as the wild dogs howl. The worms will solemnly slither towards the corpse as the bacteria begin their duties. When the feast is done, the sun will rise, set and rise again as if nothing happened.

As for the humans, they'll do nothing except wonder whatever became of me. This is because as per my ctb plan, my body will be decimated by nature and noone outside of ss will ever know I killed myself.

 

[Soulless Angel]

I think it will depend on who the person is, most though won't give a crap, and Ill be forgotten about quickly, which I am glad about.

 

[I screwed up]

Except for my parents people will forget in a couple of days ... People will make up their own stories for ur reason to ctb

 

[GoneGoneGone]

"I knew she was depressed, but I never saw it coming"

hell yeah you saw it coming, I told everyone hundreds of times

 

[Lady black]

I think most people will be shocked cause I try to look normal and happy, you know this daily theater. But it would not matter to me anymore.

 

[melancholy_lily]

I think most people will say I was selfish because that's how a lot of people view suicide unfortunately

 

[Postmortam]

Its in human nature not to care for anyone else but yourself until the extreme happens. Just like how no one will change until something drastic happens. We live in a socecity that cares more what other people think than how they feel. Id care only about how it will impact people, hopefully for the better, but in a yeat only a few will really remmeber you. Rest will go about their way.

 

[everydayiloveyou]

My family will be so sad. I don't like to imagine it. I think they'd feel extremely guilty for not doing more, but hopefully I can convey to them that my choice to ctb has very little to do with them and more to do with me and my own brain and problems. Still I dont think it'd ever be enough to curb their grief.

My extended family would probably think "thats so sad" and send supportive Facebook messages to my parents before moving on with their lives.

As for other people, they will say nothing. I don't think anyone besides my family would ever know or find out unless they asked about me. But I doubt that, since most of the people my family is close to have never met me, so it would never occur to them to ask about me, if that makes sense. I have no relationships with anyone at all.