Help what to do instead of getting high

[SectOfValtiel]

i ran out of weed yesterday, been literally smoking ash and resin left over because for the longest time its been one of the only things that calm my emotions
once the ash and resin run out idk what to do about it
the only other thing that ever calms me down is SH but i cant stand pain and it terrifies me every time even if it *does* help

i used to go on walks, but even with music those gave me too much time to think and im so out of shape it hurts like hell so not really an option (no space where i live to do any other exercise, either)
its the same with showers or reading, too much room to think so it doesnt really end up helping
and on that note, im too emotional for music and half the time listening to it just triggers another overwhelming emotion
i try to distract myself a lot but without weed its almost impossible to get my mind off shit
deep breathing never helps
i dont have anyone i can hang out with, no one to talk to, not even my therapist- and even if i could i dont think itd help much
trying to vent it out through a creative process doesnt work because i end up hating whatever im trying to draw and feeling worse for it every single time
ive thought about just sitting outside for awhile but my anxiety has turned me borderline agoraphobic so i try to avoid it as much as possible
cleaning or tidying up isnt something i can do with my housing situation being what it is- and that also didnt help much in the past
i get bored of video games the second i start to feel sad so that rarely helps lately either
therapist once told me to just 'feel' the emotion and itll pass, but it doesnt, it fluctuates sure but it can last all day if i dont mitigate it somehow
and i cant stand feeling it for even one second, it physically hurts if i let it run rampant, i shake and cry and hurt myself in response

im not sure what else to do and my therapist doesnt seem to have a clue either, he even suggested asking family for weed money pretty much lmao and im not doing that
i hate being reliant on a substance but i am and have been for years, and no, taking a break doesnt change that- even if this dry spell lasts a year weed will still be the only thing i had that helps me slow my thoughts or control my emotions

any advice? any thing else i could try? i dont want to cut anymore i really really dont want to but right now its the only thing i have left that makes the emotional/mental pain hurt even a little less
im scared to find out how bad it gets when i do fully run out of the resin and shit too
and because im actively doing research on my mental illness im triggering that overwhelming emotion even more than i usually would as well
its just a lose-lose right now and any tips towards managing it would be appreciated

 

[makethepainstop]

i ran out of weed yesterday, been literally smoking ash and resin left over because for the longest time its been one of the only things that calm my emotions
once the ash and resin run out idk what to do about it
the only other thing that ever calms me down is SH but i cant stand pain and it terrifies me every time even if it *does* help

i used to go on walks, but even with music those gave me too much time to think and im so out of shape it hurts like hell so not really an option (no space where i live to do any other exercise, either)
its the same with showers or reading, too much room to think so it doesnt really end up helping
and on that note, im too emotional for music and half the time listening to it just triggers another overwhelming emotion
i try to distract myself a lot but without weed its almost impossible to get my mind off shit
deep breathing never helps
i dont have anyone i can hang out with, no one to talk to, not even my therapist- and even if i could i dont think itd help much
trying to vent it out through a creative process doesnt work because i end up hating whatever im trying to draw and feeling worse for it every single time
ive thought about just sitting outside for awhile but my anxiety has turned me borderline agoraphobic so i try to avoid it as much as possible
cleaning or tidying up isnt something i can do with my housing situation being what it is- and that also didnt help much in the past
i get bored of video games the second i start to feel sad so that rarely helps lately either
therapist once told me to just 'feel' the emotion and itll pass, but it doesnt, it fluctuates sure but it can last all day if i dont mitigate it somehow
and i cant stand feeling it for even one second, it physically hurts if i let it run rampant, i shake and cry and hurt myself in response

im not sure what else to do and my therapist doesnt seem to have a clue either, he even suggested asking family for weed money pretty much lmao and im not doing that
i hate being reliant on a substance but i am and have been for years, and no, taking a break doesnt change that- even if this dry spell lasts a year weed will still be the only thing i had that helps me slow my thoughts or control my emotions

any advice? any thing else i could try? i dont want to cut anymore i really really dont want to but right now its the only thing i have left that makes the emotional/mental pain hurt even a little less
im scared to find out how bad it gets when i do fully run out of the resin and shit too
and because im actively doing research on my mental illness im triggering that overwhelming emotion even more than i usually would as well
its just a lose-lose right now and any tips towards managing it would be appreciated

Let me shamelessly plug for THC gummies. Brothers and sisters, are you heavy of heart? Do you have trouble sleeping? Are you stressed out? Working a job you hate? Depression off the scale? Be glad brothers and sisters, we live in the age of miracles! The age of science! THC gummies, the salvation you need at a price anyone can afford! Remember brothers and sisters chew up one THC gummie, and in a hour or an hour and a half receive blessed relief from all troubled and pains. Hallajujah, let us rejoice in this miracle of our age. THC gummies at finer head shops everywhere!

 

[jodes2]

What worked for me is reigniting old hobbies. Force yourself to spend time doing things you used to enjoy if nothing comes naturally. I smoke tobacco as a substitute, it keeps me busy and satisfies the drag requirement

 

[SectOfValtiel]

Let me shamelessly plug for THC gummies. Brothers and sisters, are you heavy of heart? Do you have trouble sleeping? Are you stressed out? Working a job you hate? Depression off the scale? Be glad brothers and sisters, we live in the age of miracles! The age of science! THC gummies, the salvation you need at a price anyone can afford! Remember brothers and sisters chew up one THC gummie, and in a hour or an hour and a half receive blessed relief from all troubled and pains. Hallajujah, let us rejoice in this miracle of our age. THC gummies at finer head shops everywhere!

if i could afford the gummies i would probably just buy weed anyway, thats not an option either
nothing that requires money is

What worked for me is reigniting old hobbies. Force yourself to spend time doing things you used to enjoy if nothing comes naturally. I smoke tobacco as a substitute, it keeps me busy and satisfies the drag requirement

ive tried, specifically drawing was one i liked a lot, but like i said i usually just end up feeling worse for it
i dont know how to get myself back into the mindset i used to have where i didnt care how it turned out because i knew i was still practicing
and thats the only hobby i really have, outside of something like playing video games but
yeah
cant really afford to get into a new hobby, either

thanks for the suggestions, though, guys

 

[makethepainstop]

if i could afford the gummies i would probably just buy weed anyway, thats not an option either
nothing that requires money is

ive tried, specifically drawing was one i liked a lot, but like i said i usually just end up feeling worse for it
i dont know how to get myself back into the mindset i used to have where i didnt care how it turned out because i knew i was still practicing
and thats the only hobby i really have, outside of something like playing video games but
yeah
cant really afford to get into a new hobby, either

thanks for the suggestions, though, guys

Damn bro, wish i could send you some gummies, and not gummy bears either!

 

[Teddybear]

Try yanking off, wurks for me.

 

[jodes2]

if i could afford the gummies i would probably just buy weed anyway, thats not an option either
nothing that requires money is

ive tried, specifically drawing was one i liked a lot, but like i said i usually just end up feeling worse for it
i dont know how to get myself back into the mindset i used to have where i didnt care how it turned out because i knew i was still practicing
and thats the only hobby i really have, outside of something like playing video games but
yeah
cant really afford to get into a new hobby, either

thanks for the suggestions, though, guys

Try variations of old hobbies. Maybe something slightly different that brings a new excitement. That's what worked for me. I just changed what I'm doing slightly compared to before when I was into the hobbies a long time ago. Try to find inspiration, think a little outside the box