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Have you ever had a psychotic or nervous breakdown ? Something that temporarily sent you over the edge ?
What was it like ? What symptoms did you observe ? Did you maintain self-awareness or did someone document your symptoms ?
How long did you go "under" ? How did you recover ?
Don't know what it was ( I am going to tell you what happened and you juge ). I remember last year I was very depressed , suicidal and angry . So there was one of my best friend that left me at a very important moment of my life (there was other things but this was the main thing) . I was so mad I wanted to take revenge and hurt her . and every time that one of my plans to hurt her worked I was just hysterical and i was laughing of joy . Or sometimes i had mental break down alone in my room and hitting every pillows myself and planing on bringing knife or push her off a balcony . i also had some hallucinations It wasn't often but. i am not living alone so one time I was seeing bugs everywhere. there was nothing and i am not even that scared of bugs . And I went on the living room crying I putted a bag on my head. I don't know why I did that. And they called me crazy plus I don't usually cry in front of people .
-so what it felt like ?
I just felt like my emotions stronger .
And afterwards I don't know I felt like two different people .
-how long did it last ? some minutes but like every day . and mostly when I was alone.
-how did I recover? I don't know I don't even know if I did. I never went to therapy btw . I just made peace with that friend; I am not sure if it's what really stopped it . Like it s just impulsivity i don't know It could happen again I could loose control over a little thing. Or maybe it really stopped. After this I don't know what I am capable of .
so is this insanity?