K

Kalista

Failed hard to pull the trigger - Now using SN
Feb 5, 2023
379
What was your thought process? What did you feel during it? What did you do in order to accept the result of your plan and how it's going to affect everything else?

If you're still trying to accept it, what are you doing now to do so?

Share with us your insight in this struggle.
 
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AInilam

AInilam

Student
Dec 17, 2023
173
For me it was giving into the delusion of believing in an afterlife. Sometimes I like to daydream of all the wonderful and fantastical things that'll greet me there, all wishes, wants and needs fulfilled.

And also accepting oblivion, if there isn't an afterlife--if there isn't anything at all but eternal sleep, at least I'll be at peace, it'll be preferable to this harsh reality and I wont have to suffer anymore. I wont be disappointed at least because I'll be dead.
 
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certified_idiot

certified_idiot

No Longer Human
Dec 5, 2023
83
I was never that connected to life in the first place. I never thought it meant anything. Death is just the conclusion to life, so it's just as important. I'd only really care about death if I cared about life, which I don't, so I never needed to accept death, it's just an escape from life. I happen to not like life that much, so death is the preferable for me.
 
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dinosavr

dinosavr

and if i’m turning blue, please, don’t save me 🌛
Dec 14, 2023
696
It started with the idea of me being completely, 100% useless and boring. I know good things will happen to me, I can travel, I can go to concerts, spend valuable time with my friends, read tons of good books or whatever. I have a loving family and friends, quite a good job, a safe place to live, etc. So, good things are ahead of me, for sure. And not that I'm not grateful but umm I guess everyone dies at some point and everyone will lose their future one day. So if it's inevitable - who cares when it happens. It will be even easier now that I hate myself and I don't care about my future and I'm not even a bit sad about not having to live it. It's like wasting time and space here.
Also, when it comes down to my family for instance. I used to feel guilty for wanting to leave them but tbh not anymore. I didn't ask for suicidal ideation and I didn't want it my life. Once it's here, I have to deal with it and I am allowed to lose. Just as you're allowed to die of cancer or a heart attack or whatever. And each one of them will have to die, too. So the others will have to go through grief many times and that's just a part of life. If they love life so much they should accept it lol. It shouldn't be my problem and definitely not my fault or anything.
 
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D

doneforlife

Arcanist
Jul 18, 2023
486
There was a point in time, where I never thought about death. For me , it didn't exist or existed too far for me to think about it. Or may be my life was too good for death to have a place in it. But now, I am ok with death. I don't have severe attachment to life. I can happily leave everything behind because you don't need all these stuff once you stop having a body ...lol. My only concern is the pain while leaving this body. I have very less threshold for pain.
 
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ijustwishtodie

ijustwishtodie

death will be my ultimate bliss
Oct 29, 2023
5,158
I thought about how peaceful death actually is. Being permanently non existent is something many people see as terrifying but it's always something that I saw as beautiful as it aligned with my neurotype and mindset. In death, there's no suffering at all and sure there isn't happiness either but, unlike when you're sentient, one doesn't get depressed at not feeling happy during death as they can't feel. There is no them. They don't have to deal with emotions, they don't have to work, they don't have to suffer, they don't have to think, they don't have to manage day to day tasks.. it's purely bliss to me. I never wanted to be a human and only death can help me with that now
 
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F

Forever Sleep

Earned it we have...
May 4, 2022
9,798
I think I've just had so long to think about death. The first death in my family for me was my Mum when I was 3. There were two more close family deaths by the time I was 10. So, I feel like I grew up with death in a way. It seemed far more inevitable than maybe it did for people who weren't confronted with it early on. Plus, ages 10-18 were horrible, so during that time, I really wanted it to come early.

I suppose it's just reasoning in a way though. It's one of those anavoidable things in life like aging. I guess it's understandable to fear certain aspects of it but it's kind of pointless to fear the thing itself. Plus- thank goodness it does exist- imagine if we were immortal! Obviously- some people will argue that we are but- this current life will end in it's current format at least some day.
 
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R_N

R_N

-Memento Mori-
Dec 3, 2019
1,442
Death being inevitable is one of the reasons but tbf it doesn't matter if I accepted it or not. Life is pushing us towards death, one way or another.
 
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O

oddetoad

Arcanist
Nov 25, 2023
496
Oh death is not the harder part to accept , it's the extreme amount of evidence for reincarnation that's hard to accept

I would never ever want to come back to this hellhole ever again
 
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Tears in Rain

Tears in Rain

..............
Dec 12, 2023
858
I think of a few things when I think about accepting death:
1) It's gonna happen anyway, and it can happen anytime. Given that it's inevitable, there no point in worrying about ending the journey early.
2) It will put an end to the suffering.
3) Stats vary, but over 150,000 people die every day worldwide. And around 700,000 people ctb worldwide every year. They have all gone through the death process; I'll just be joining them.
 
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almaPerdida

almaPerdida

"Oh God, I’m so depressed." - Marvin
Nov 24, 2023
142
It's just something that happens, and i want it to happen faster. I don't have any ambition to grow in the future, i don't have any desire to be rich or have success. I have the potential but not the will, it's like i am throwing it all in the trash but i'm fine with it. I just wanna rest because the future seems bleak and empty, even if i manage to somehow get there. I wanna skip this phase and go straight to death.
 
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pthnrdnojvsc

pthnrdnojvsc

Extreme Pain is much worse than people know
Aug 12, 2019
2,733
Death is going to happen quickly anyway because time passes faster than humans understand. This year 2023 is practically over where did the time go? 2024 in a few days .

Death will be like it was before I was born when I had no problems , couldn't suffer nor feel pain in other words absolute bliss = non-existence. The problems and the horror began for me when I was born
 
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FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
38,856
In my case I see ceasing to exist as a positive thing, the thought of no longer existing is all that comforts me and I see to permanently cease existing as the only ideal outcome. Just the fact that nobody can be harmed by not existing yet there is unlimited potential for torture and suffering in this hellish existence is enough to make me wish for death. To me existence is the problem and I see death as the solution, it terrifies me how there is no limit as to how much one can suffer all while they are just waiting to decay and die anyway.
 
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U

until death

maybe it's time to say goodbye
Dec 12, 2023
126
I accepted death from the moment I lost important people in my life
 
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Aim

Aim

🤍
Sep 12, 2023
945
I think I never will be able to except it 100%. Because life has so much good to it also. You just need to see it. But I think 90% I good enough acceptance for me.
 
mutt

mutt

Member
Dec 21, 2023
12
"I do not fear death. I had been dead for billions and billions of years before I was born, and had not suffered the slightest inconvenience from it."
- Mark Twain
 
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HollowDrop

HollowDrop

ah
Oct 4, 2023
135
Death is inevitable, everyone's life ends eventually. It's a lesson I've learned through those dear to me passing away from natural causes. Just the course of nature and some people simply decide to pass away sooner by their own hand. We are all just flesh creatures on this earth, people dying is every day life. I am simply one in a big planet of billions, losing me does nothing to this world.
Coming to terms with hurting my family is a harder pill to swallow, but I also know they simply need time to get over it and that's that. They all have each other, they know I am suffering. They are all strong. I only wish they could understand and accept why I feel like I need to commit suicide to finally be in peace. I don't want then to think it's their fault. It's not.
 
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BrainShower

BrainShower

Tiny storm
Nov 7, 2023
253
All life includes death as an integral facet.
There is no life without death.
Our culture loves to fetishize neverending life, but it is a pointless, nonexistent waste of time.
Death is something I am comfortable with. It is just as natural as life.
 
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Aim

Aim

🤍
Sep 12, 2023
945
accept it! lhaha! But i get you, acceptance is one of the hardest things a man can do. I took me time to come to allmost full acceptance! so i would recommend you to not force it. :) It comes when it comes!
 
Leavesfromthevine

Leavesfromthevine

Untreated Trauma
Nov 23, 2023
339
I didn't have to accept death. Life has just been so miserable that it's always seemed the better choice. Aside from my actions ofc there's nothing I directly did to accept death. I guess once you hit a certain point you don't worry about accepting it.
 
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penguinl0v3s

penguinl0v3s

Wait for Me 💙
Nov 1, 2023
798
"There's nothing worse than death except for suffering" is what someone who I used to know said. They were successful in their ctb.
 
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