What do you think of your relationship with alcohol?

[mydeadflowers]

For those who hold some form of reliance on alcohol, I want to know what you think and feel about it as a substance. I'd say I hold a relatively mild dependency on it as of now.

The fact that it helps drown out certain negative emotions is nice, but the sole benefit that I'm capable of finding within this dependency of mine is the fact that I find myself drawing far more easier than I would sober. I become a lot less picky with my own art style, and I feel as though I'm capable of tapping into a side of myself that I lost after my high school years, a side of myself that sincerely enjoyed this practice, and even held aspirations regarding it.

There's no doubt that my reliance on alcohol is a net negative given the fact that my anxiety and inclination towards social withdrawal skyrocket the more I drink (me having an addictive personality doesn't help this), but I'd like to know how others who regularly drink feel about their own relationship with alcohol.

(Sorry if this is nonsensical in any way, I am drunk as I'm currently typing this)

 

[kitkatt]

For those who hold some form of reliance on alcohol, I want to know what you think and feel about it as a substance. I'd say I hold a relatively mild dependency on it as of now.

The fact that it helps drown out certain negative emotions is nice, but the sole benefit that I'm capable of finding within this dependency of mine is the fact that I find myself drawing far more easier than I would sober. I become a lot less picky with my own art style, and I feel as though I'm capable of tapping into a side of myself that I lost after my high school years, a side of myself that sincerely enjoyed this practice, and even held aspirations regarding it.

There's no doubt that my reliance on alcohol is a net negative given the fact that my anxiety and inclination towards social withdrawal skyrocket the more I drink (me having an addictive personality doesn't help this), but I'd like to know how others who regularly drink feel about their own relationship with alcohol.

(Sorry if this is nonsensical in any way, I am drunk as I'm currently typing this)

I unfortunately for myself feel as though alcohol brings out the worst in me especially if I am alone this doesn't mean I don't use it and other substances though. Are you using responsibly in a sense (ha ha he he were in sasu I'm also fucked up so no judgement not booze but im coping with something I can purchase at the store) because I've seen people deal with addiction and I've seen those like me and while I judge neither I think about my mother and all of the problems she had extra in her life due to the addiction at times. I can't fight other's battles but I wish I could talk to her before she broke. You know her mind it'd be nice to to let her know she's not alone me too. Sorry for rambling I should probably be sleeping I doubt anything I said helped but you you know I'll be delusional and hope it helps anyway;(

 

[hereandthere13]

can't drink anymore because the last two times i've gotten drunk i almost ruined my life.

 

[Forever Sleep]

It's very on- off. I probably haven't had a drink in a week or so. I tend to use it to make me sleepy before bed or, to numb myself down when I feel the need. At one point, I was getting through a bottle of rum a week- which I'm sure is excessive. I've never really felt addicted though. I stopped drinking all alcohol for a few years following gallbladder problems. I also started drinking regularly fairly late- more towards my 30's. I have a far worse relationship with food though. I can take or leave alcohol.

 

[kunikuzushi]

I also feel mildly dependent on it, but in a different way. it's the only way I can get through social situations because it helps me fool everyone that I'm not miserable. but it only lasts so long. i drank tonight and now I'm alone and the drop is hitting me hard and makes me even more miserable than usual.

 

[BigTimeLoser]

I'm sober for almost 6 years, I spent most of my University time drunk and stupid high on almost everything but heroin. Fent wasn't a thing back then.
I am Unlucky-Lucky to be alive, 3-4 days benders, and driving across states while drinking and driving.
Now I rawdog life sober, depressed, suicidal, with no IG, no Fb, no social life, no TV/Series or whatsoever. I joined because the only precious thing that kept my alive (Wife and Stepson) are gone from me.
Waiting fot the moment.

 

[May16th]

Either I don't drink for weeks or an entire month, but when I do drink, I drink the whole weekend, on some Leaving Las Vegas type shit. In case you haven't watched it, it means drinking yourself to death, but most of the time, I just pass out. But yes, alcohol was my only companion on my worst days, and along with music and literature, it's one of the only reasons I haven't gone completely insane.

 

[drinkthenectar]

For those who hold some form of reliance on alcohol, I want to know what you think and feel about it as a substance. I'd say I hold a relatively mild dependency on it as of now.

The fact that it helps drown out certain negative emotions is nice, but the sole benefit that I'm capable of finding within this dependency of mine is the fact that I find myself drawing far more easier than I would sober. I become a lot less picky with my own art style, and I feel as though I'm capable of tapping into a side of myself that I lost after my high school years, a side of myself that sincerely enjoyed this practice, and even held aspirations regarding it.

There's no doubt that my reliance on alcohol is a net negative given the fact that my anxiety and inclination towards social withdrawal skyrocket the more I drink (me having an addictive personality doesn't help this), but I'd like to know how others who regularly drink feel about their own relationship with alcohol.

(Sorry if this is nonsensical in any way, I am drunk as I'm currently typing this)

I actually really don't like drinking but lately I've been drinking just to feel drunk a lot because I'm really depressed. I also used it to try to overdose with adderall on my last attempt.

 

[SASU-KE]

can't drink anymore because the last two times i've gotten drunk i almost ruined my life.

Proud of you for staying away and I commend anyone who can stay away from it.

I had a short stint with it myself and I just didn't like what it did to me. Stopped it after some time and never looked back.

The simple thing that did it for me is this irrefutable fact.

No matter how miserable or depressed I am, alcohol will make me even more so. End of story. I don't need that.

No one does.

 

[Forveleth]

Alcohol is just the current contestant in a line of unhealthy coping mechanisms that I have had in my life. It definitely does not have positive effects for me overall, however it does bring me temporary relief. But this has been the case with everything that I have used to cope with my depression, including some of the medications I have taken, so I do not consider alcohol better or worse than anything else I have been using to make myself feel better.

 

[americanoomad]

Alcohol was the worst part of my life, and I was lucky enough to get sober when I was 20. As someone who isn't able to have a drink without reaching for the next one, and then the next one, and a few more—getting sober saved my life and gave me a second chance. I really relied on drinking as a way to numb all the painful emotions I dealt with and didn't know how to process them healthily, and it gave me this false sense of comfort since, for years, I was constantly just drunk/hungover, and it was the only feeling I knew. I needed a drink when I woke up, when I had a meal, when I was running errands, or just by myself. During those years, I had no will to live, but I was too afraid to die. And now that I'm no longer fueling my addiction and have a clear head, I can feel all those emotions again at full force, which can be overwhelming sometimes, especially when I'm depressed, but I think I'd rather feel everything than nothing if given the choice.

 

[darksouls]

in the last millennium,
I had to drink every day until I threw up,
and then I had to keep drinking immediately,
I was already a mental wreck back then

 

[SASU-KE]

During those years, I had no will to live, but I was too afraid to die.

Death by alcohol is a terrible, terrible choice, even if depressed and suicidal. A lady was speaking about taking care of her daughter who was dying of liver failure due to alcohol. Whatever the girl ate would come out of her, just like carrot juice. Your liver is done and that's it. It can't process anything anymore. Horrific way to go and you lose all dignity.

 

[l1ablemistakes]

I've recently begun to accept that I'm an alcoholic. It's fucked. I've been told my whole life it runs in my family but actually seeing it in myself feels like I've let everyone down. But I can't sleep otherwise. I feel a nagging boredom when I'm awake and sober and just waiting for a moment I don't have to feel anything.

I drink most days. It doesn't make me sick anymore. I think I've ruined my body. I can't get drunk unless it's to black out. Dont be like me. You'll ruin all your friendships even if you somehow manage to stay functioning.

Msg me anytime if you need. I can't promise I'll be much help. But I've experienced a lot.

 

[lysergamide]

I used to be a big time drinker and when i feel like the day has been complete utter shit I happen to drink a bottle of sparkling wine or a can of vody really fast from time to time. I'm losing tolerance though? And the more time passes the less I like it, the taste of bad alcohol gets more acute, the vomiting at night, the hangovers, the organs screaming for help the next day doesn't help. I found something else to rely on that's not better because it absolutely fucks up my memory big time. Alcohol isn't that good for escapism is what I wound up thinking, but nice if I had a harsh day and I want to be absolutely fucked up. I can't draw while alcoholized tho my drawings look like ass when I do

 

[BillyBob]

I was abusing alcohol
when I was studying and it was the only relief I had from real life until it got so bad I was taking it to class with me.
After that and a few blackouts from it mixing with medications I quit it and have been sober for 10 years now

 

[thelostautistic]

My relationship with alcohol isn't very healthy. In the past I used to abuse it and put myself in dangerous situations because I had no regard for my safety. Now I don't drink heavily like I used to but I still depend on it for emotional numbness when I'm struggling mentally. I can go weeks/months without drinking alcohol and then suddenly I'm drinking every day to cope. It doesn't help that alcohol also makes me feel less autistic. I crave it a lot because of that. It makes me feel "normal" for a short period of time. I know I have a problem with alcohol but for the time being it's keeping me sane so I'm not willing to give it up. Sorry for the ramble

 

[Afterglow]

My relationship was as violent as it was short lived.

I only ever really drank on my 21st birthday and I learned in the ER the next day that I'm alcohol intolerant.

Felt like a very good stopping point.