Primarily, I want to wait till my Dad goes first. Ideally, I want to get a lot of practical stuff sorted out. Phone contract paid off. Tax returns up to date. Information about bills/ service prodivers to hand. Notes written etc.
Psychologically, I guess I will have to be as sure as I can be that I'm doing the right thing. That fear of my future and hatred of my present is enough to push me over SI. That it's also worth risking repremands in an afterlife- if there even is one. I'm undecided.
I don't personally believe that suicide is a sign of failure. I'm not actually very unhappy with the amount of effort I put into life. I even achieved some of the things I wanted. It's more that I personally don't think it's worth the effort! I think it's reasonable to quit a rigged and unfulfulling game you never agreed to play to begin with.
As for relationships, I've purposely let them drift, asides from my Dad- who I'm waiting patiently for. So hopefully- the impact will be less on those left behind.
Mostly though, I need to somehow ensure that I do succeed in my first attempt- or, rounds of attempts. Ideally, I would like to have more than one method set up. Mostly though- when the time comes, asides from all the tedious practical stuff I'll try to get done, it will be about summoning the most tremendous amount of courage I imagine.