This is what I have in mind if there is no ctb partner
1. Day -3 : I will go play soccer because I have always loved playing soccer ever since I was a kid.
2. Day -2 : I will go to the beach, take in the breeze and ocean water smell, enjoy the sunshine, then go to my favorite restaurant for lunch or dinner.
3. Day -1 : I will go hiking up in the mountains (there is this spot that's secluded from everything and just surrounded by beautiful nature), I am gonna enjoy that view, and then go home and cook my all time favorite meal as my last meal, and then that night I will watch my all time favorite tv show Prison Break.
4. On the day : wake up, put on some good sad music, take prerequisite meds for sn, prepare sn, and start a goodbye thread, drink sn, update the goodbye thread until I am gone.
The most important thing on the day of my death is that I won't make a big deal out of it, no reason to be scared or feel anxious, I have felt enough fear, anxiety and despair in my lifetime that I will be damned if I allow them to steal my peace on my final day. I will just show up, do what I need to do, endure what needs enduring with sn and get my rest.