Discussion What are or were your parents like?

[Maravillosa]

My late father (who died of arteriosclerosis in 2014, aged 74) was an alcoholic, a gambler, and a womanizer. He seemed to think that being a good provider was all that was needed to be considered a good father -- his father (who had also been an alcoholic) had died when Dad was 11 years old, so Dad did not have a good example of how a father should behave. Dad did not feel comfortable giving affection (though he molested me a couple of times when he was very drunk): he seemed to think money would suffice. Any positive qualities? He was passionately political in a rather old-fashioned liberal manner (he was rather a New Deal Democrat, I think) and it was fun discussing current events with him.

My mother (who is 79 years old, completely bedridden and with a failing short-term memory) is affectionate, hot-tempered, a bit smothering. I care for her dearly and do not intend to ctb while she is alive. My parents were miserably married: they had few common interests, and I suspect they would have never married each other had Mom not gotten pregnant with me. Dad left Mom for another woman in 1995: the divorce was finalized on September 11, 2001 (of all days). Dad stayed with his companion until he died but never married her. Mom did not date anybody else after Dad left her, much less remarry.

I remember that when I was 15 years old and Dad had gone missing for a few days, I was summoned to the administrative office of my high school. I was sure that Dad had gotten himself killed in a car crash and I told myself to remember the moment. I was taken in to see my guidance counselor, who told me... that my English teacher had recommended that I enter an honors course. I think the reason why the English teacher wanted me to enter the honors course was that on Muriel Spark's birthday (the English teacher had a habit of writing on the chalkboard the birthdays of famous writers), I recognized the name and told the teacher, "Oh! She wrote The Prime of Miss Jean Brodie!" The English teacher seemed to think that if I knew who Muriel Spark was, I was too advanced for his class

 

[HGL91]

Lol I rarely hear people say they like their parents. That alone would make me not want to be a parent even if I wasn't an antinatalist or suicidal.

What really is a good parent anyway? I mean, we're all here. Considering the news shows that parents drown their kids, shoot them, beat them to death, leave their toddlers in cars on a hot day, as well as many other irresponsible things, I'd say most people's parents on this forum did a pretty good job considering they kept their kids alive for at least 18 years. That's 6,570 days of dedicating your time, energy and resources to a person. I can barely keep a house plant alive for a week!

 

[GinaIsReady]

I adore both my parents. Hated them when they were alive.

 

[Asta]

When my Mother told my so-called father that I was on the way, he wanted her to get rid of me – even gave her some kind of meds to do the job. She flushed them down the commode, said "to hell with you" and left. She worked in offices for 30 years and raised me by herself, with not one penny of child support from him. My Mother was loving, caring and supportive my entire life and to be with her in the afterlife is the main reason for wanting to exit. Her last words to me were, "I'll love you forever."

 

[blanketyblk]

My parents were awesome. no two ways about that. they raised me well and proper and never one walked away from me when things where hard or they didn't understand. they taught me about music, art and the joy of reading. they showed me parts of the word where they got their joy from. not a day goes by that i don't miss them or think about them.

 

[Conflicted Cat]

My mother's an alcoholic, but her heart's in the right place and is still a good person. My father's a good man, very supportive, and always there for me. Even through all the shit that's happened... He's a good dad, and I wouldn't have any other dad if I could.