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Menschenmühle

Menschenmühle

Member
Jan 21, 2022
80
two months ago, I tried to commit suicide. Unfortunately I was found out and failed. I was sent to a mental ward, but I was able to lie my way out of that hellhole.
The problem that remains is that my family members found out about my attempt. They managed to guilt trip me by telling me that they won't be able to cope with my death. Now I don't know what to do, I don't want to hurt anyone but I really need to die. What should I do?
 
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Darkover

Darkover

Archangel
Jul 29, 2021
5,569
do whats right for you, don't keep yourself alive for the sake of hurting your family they should taken better care of you in the first place
 
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actual_fox

actual_fox

Arcanist
Sep 15, 2022
469
Damn that is horrible.

Would you forgive yourself? This is what I would ask. I will ask myself this question too?
Will I be able to accept the loss of family and the "harm" done. Would i accept the life I would live If I did not ctb?
 
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Menschenmühle

Menschenmühle

Member
Jan 21, 2022
80
do whats right for you, don't keep yourself alive for the sake of hurting your family they should taken better care of you in the first place
But they're not responsible for my life's outcome, I really don't want to hurt them.
 
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Sittichmutter

Sittichmutter

Student
Sep 16, 2021
164
Liebe Menschenmühle
I am sorry about your attempt and your pain.
It is been just 2 months. Why the hurry? Let your family know about your pain. Let them help you before talking such a a heavy decision.
I hope you get better.
Mit Liebe,
S
 
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FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
43,275
Only you know what is best for yourself but I believe that nobody should feel as though they are forced to stay here against their wishes only for the sake of others, and to me it's wrong to guilt trip people into enduring a life that they never even asked for in the first place. When to leave this world is a personal decision and that fact should be respected.

The reality is that grief and loss are simply an inevitable part of life and are a consequence of bringing life here into this world. Eventually we will all die and lose everything anyway, so continuing to exist is only delaying the inevitable. But it sounds really horrible what you have been through, I hate the fact how people feel as though they have the right to interfere in suicide attempts to try and force people to continue suffering. Some people simply don't want to be here and we all deserve the choice of whether we want to stay or not.
 
locked*n*loaded

locked*n*loaded

Archangel
Apr 15, 2022
8,855
When someone actually reaches the real point of when they're ready to ctb, they don't actually care if anyone else will be hurt. Someone elses hurt becomes secondary to them in stopping their own hurt. I'm not saying that you don't want to ctb. All I'm saying is that, evidently, you still have an amount of caring going on inside of you, directed towards others, which is influencing your ability to ctb. CTB is only about you. It has to be that way.
 
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makethepainstop

makethepainstop

Visionary
Sep 16, 2022
2,029
two months ago, I tried to commit suicide. Unfortunately I was found out and failed. I was sent to a mental ward, but I was able to lie my way out of that hellhole.
The problem that remains is that my family members found out about my attempt. They managed to guilt trip me by telling me that they won't be able to cope with my death. Now I don't know what to do, I don't want to hurt anyone but I really need to die. What should I do?
What is the greater suffering for you? Staying alive and suffering to prevent them from suffering? Or ending your pain? You alone know the answer! Much love to you.
 
flyingtopluto

flyingtopluto

Member
Dec 2, 2022
13
My situation is really similar to yours. I was discharged from a mental facility about 1-2 months ago as well. I'm in the same dilemma but the main thing that's holding me back from making a successful attempt is my SI.

I agree with @makethepainstop, the choice is really up to you.
 
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