Venting Well i am stuck with this crappy life now

[Mort]

Well looks like i am going to have to live the rest of my life well most of it any way. I tell you why my father passed away last Saturday after a short illness not from this bug thats going around. Any way i will being looking after my mother now help out with things like paying the bills and doing other things. So i cant CTB now and leve my mother all a loan i do have a sister but dont trust her these days. So i am now stuck with my crappy life i cant just drop my mother into the dodo like that know matter how much I want to kill my self. Know going to sound odd but when my father passed away first thought was lucky sod it's all over for him sort of got a bit jealous. I know sounds bad say that but i just did he now free from everything. And i have to wait for a nother 20 years or so before it's my time to go.

 

[Deleted member 1465]

I'm really sorry about your dad. A very tough time for you. I think your feelings are valid and it's an honourable attitude to have, to put your mum above your personal needs. Wish I could say more to help, but grief is so personal (on top of whatever brings you here too). It just hurts and there is no way around that.