Best thing about being on the ward was that they had a punchbag. I taught a young guy and a nurse how to use it properly. I often saw the guy using it and after saw him smiling properly instead of the weird, slightly scary smile he'd have on his face half the time before he was about to let rip at someone. It helped me too even though it made my wrist injury worse, which is why I had to quit boxing. I highly recommend joining a boxing gym and learning how to train properly. You don't have to fight, just how to train. Give it a go. Failing that, running, cycling: anything you can do to push yourself to the edge of your limits or just beyond. That's the same chemical reaction in your body that you'll get from SH. It's also gross and disgusting and you may well vomit and pass out (I've done both from extreme exercise and SH). Give it a go.
But please stop using "random" sharp objects to cut unless you're cleaning them properly first. You don't want infections. Trust me on that.