All my attempts to settle back into society by going back to education has failed tremendously. I can't stop thinking about how much time I've wasted just because of my fears and addiction. Three years ago, as i enrolled into a high school, i could've finished it and gotten my diploma and been a second year college student this year but no I dropped out of high school before even giving my exams. Even prior to high school I've had many problems with missing school. I can't fucking stand myself i hate myself so much for it. Even this year when it was beginning i missed another opportunity to go back to school. It was also the first time ever i cried to my sibling about it because i do wanted to finish my education. I fucking hate myself so much for it.
No matter what i do or try it's useless because I'm a pathetic pussy who cant do anything in life i feel like it's best to die now before turning 40 and still being the same as ever because i know nothing will change. I wanted to actually live because there's so many things i wanted to experience but it's utterly useless because it'll never happen
No matter what i do or try it's useless because I'm a pathetic pussy who cant do anything in life i feel like it's best to die now before turning 40 and still being the same as ever because i know nothing will change. I wanted to actually live because there's so many things i wanted to experience but it's utterly useless because it'll never happen
