I don't know what to discuss about either.
I've been dealing with suicidal thoughts for quite some time now and the only thing I could do to cope was to get a step back from myself. I focused on art, phylosophical works or things like that, so now I feel like I don't get to think by myself.
What I can share are some poems I really like from Charles Baudelaire, a French poet. You may know him, or you may not. He is known for "turning mud into gold", which mean to turn ugly things to poetic topics. For instance, he romanticized a corpse decomposing which was quite controversial and new for his time. The Church made sure to censor his works so they were published years after his death.
My favorite poem of his is the longest he ever wrote : "Benediction".
He embodies a poet blessed by God, which is a common idea in Poetry, but then cursed by humans.
My favorite quote is :
«Towards Heaven, where his eye sights a splendid throne,
The serene Poet raises his pious arms,
And the vast inspired-flashes of his lucid mind
Thieve him of the sight of the furious mass :
"Be blessed, my God, who provide suffering
As a divine remedy for our impurities
And as the best and the purest essence
That prepares the strong for holy delights!»
I once cried in the middle of the class when I read this extract.
I don't know why those lines strike me, I don't even believe in God.
I think I found it beautiful to feel as if my suffering had a meaning, and was in reality a blessing more than a curse. Baudelaire turned suffering into something special, into something we shouldn't be ashamed of. We should embrace our condition and get stronger.
If you're interested into more Baudelaire's work I would recommend his most famous poem :
"Get drunk !
You have to be always drunk. That's all there is to it—it's the only way. So as not to feel the horrible burden of time that breaks your back and bends you to the earth, you have to be continually drunk.
But on what? Wine, poetry or virtue, as you wish. But be drunk.
And if sometimes, on the steps of a palace or the green grass of a ditch, in the mournful solitude of your room, you wake again, drunkenness already diminishing or gone, ask the wind, the wave, the star, the bird, the clock, everything that is flying, everything that is groaning, everything that is rolling, everything that is singing, everything that is speaking. . .ask what time it is and wind, wave, star, bird, clock will answer you: "It is time to be drunk! So as not to be the martyred slaves of time, be drunk, be continually drunk! On wine, on poetry or on virtue as you wish."
I'm not alcoholic, but I also really like this one. I think Baudelaire's poems have the same result as wine too ! I always feel delighted.
I hope I shared something interesting enough. Have a good one and I wish you the best for your last days on earth.
Maybe you'll be granted the "holy delights" too, who knows ? ;)
