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blueclover_.

blueclover_.

Better Never to Have Been: 2006, David Benatar
Oct 11, 2021
668
@91Days, @TheHatedOne, @Cheers, i wonder how they've been. It must be so peaceful, right? I love them. I love them all. I hope everything's okay there. I want to go there soon. I'm waiting for something big enough to trigger 'that' feeling and actually take the poison. I've been getting hopes lately, but again, life turns me down. I just hope she doesn't betray me. I know she doesn't like me back, she's just trying to be nice. Besides, no one likes me beside from my looks. I tried to be a reserved person but in the end, no one will ever accept the real me like that person. My ex-girlfriend who ran away from home and left me here. She's got problems, damn, i wish you were here. I thought Dea would be similar to her, my ex-girlfriend, but turns out they're completely different. Why am i like this? I want to cry, why can't i do that anymore? Please just kill me. Someone. My dad used to beat me up for every single thing i do, but now i guess that i've thrown my pride away, he treats me well now. Of course it's all fake, he's just trying to make me stay here and take care of him when he's old.

And, Nibras. He still likes me. Strange, i was the one who flirted with him, yet he still clings up to me after our graduation. All that talk about liking someone else, i even helped him to ask that girl out, yet he said he still likes me. Honestly, i've been keeping him fairly close for my own amusement. He's cute, yeah, but i don't like him in that kind of way anymore. Not after you came into my life when i was severely depressed. You... you were my light back then. My only light. It was pitch black. But now it's gray. The world doesn't look so scary anymore. Since you left, nothing seems to matter. I'm drunk, alone, and i want to kill myself. I don't care about anyone, i want to cry,
 
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VoidDesirer22

VoidDesirer22

A dream inside a locked room
Sep 6, 2021
673
Do you have a link to @TheHatedOne goodbye thread? Did they make one? I've seen them around a lot.
 
blueclover_.

blueclover_.

Better Never to Have Been: 2006, David Benatar
Oct 11, 2021
668
Do you have a link to @TheHatedOne goodbye thread? Did they make one? I've seen them around a lot.
Did they survive the SN? Ihaven't checked this site for a while, gotta go see
 
StarryStarry

StarryStarry

Cat Lady
Oct 25, 2021
749
I can hear the pain in your words. I am so sorry you are feeling so lost and alone.
 
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blueclover_.

blueclover_.

Better Never to Have Been: 2006, David Benatar
Oct 11, 2021
668
"Suicide is self-care" - @Cheers
Hahahah true. I said to her in last thread that we would've been good friends if things were different, we could hang out together. Lolz
I can hear the pain in your words. I am so sorry you are feeling so lost and alone.
Thanks. Honestly, i'm pathetic. Knowing some of you guys do read my thoughts here, when i can't ever possibly share these to the people in the real world, is nice.

I'm oversharing again, but i guess that's fine. It's not like people on the internet can use these infos against me since no one knows anyone.
 
Last edited:
Dot

Dot

Info abt typng styl on prfle.
Sep 26, 2021
3,316
I Got You Heart GIF by Tristen J. Winger
 
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FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
43,084
I'm sorry you are suffering so much. I know that this life can be unbearable when you are in so much pain. I wish you the best in whatever happens.
 

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