Discussion User Discussion Megathread

[Deleted member 1465]

Anyone knows where is @Epsilon0 .

https://sanctioned-suicide.net/members/epsilon0.13451/#recent-content

She left quite some time ago. All I got was a quick PM saying that her time her was done, no drama. She din't make it clear to me what that meant. Then she was gone.

Slomo @Giraffey ? Left suddenly recently.

 

[KleinerWolf]

@DeathStar42

 

[BitterlyAlive_]

@DeathStar42

I was wondering, too. Looks like they self-banned. :(

 

[Maka hiamoe]

Does anyone know what happened to @Stepheng7287 ? I think he likely ctb and self-banned before doing so but I'm not sure.

 

[throwaway123]

Regarding the passing of active and contributing members... I talked about a very similar subject back in 2019, from a more general viewpoint. Take a look at this thread, if you're curious about the opinion of a 2019 RainAndSadness, struggling to comprehend the same questions that were asked in this thread. I was also concerned with the subject of passing members and raised some general questions about active, inactive and passed members in this forum. It's worth a read in my opinion. I created this thread almost one year ago but considering it touched a very similar issue, maybe it helps to give some perspective into my thought process and what was going on in my mind back then:

https://sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/passed-and-inactive-members.28277/

Now, let's fast forward to 2020 and talk about today, much has changed. Right? Well, not really. GPE did contribute a lot to this forum and they were extremely active and wrote many high-quality posts. But there were members of the calibre of people like GPE in the past. We had many members in the past that were adored by the community for their compassion, support and their contribution to the community... they all left a long time ago and well... the sad truth is, they all seem to be forgotten nowadays because most members that could remember them simply have passed away as well. Sonnenblume was one of them, throwback to May 2018, when the forum was fresh and young.

https://sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/sonnenblume.404/

I just registered in the forum when I heard about her passing and the community was shocked and stunned. She left via SN and contributed a lot to this method, back when barely anything was known about it. But nobody is talking about her anymore, it's like she never existed. I don't doubt that the same cycle is gonna repeat itself in this case too. We're all gonna die or leave this forum someday and will be replaced with new people that don't know much about the previous generation of members. And I'll be one of them, once I manage to ctb... there will be a point in this forum when nobody will even know who the fuck I was. This is gonna happen to all of us. It's inevitable.
Again, look at the goodbye thread for Sonnenblume. Basically all of the people that left a comment in that thread, with a few exceptions, have left the forum. They're either are crossed out or stopped being active.

Now, regarding the pain and grief that comes with goobye threads... as someone who has been here for 2.5 years, I can confirm that this is very difficult topic. It still is. And it will never get any easier, doesn't matter how many of us pass away, it's always gonna hit me right there, in my chest. It's extremely stressful, that's why I started to keep some distance between myself and others - no offense to any of you, I really appreciate you all but I witnessed this process of dying friends a bit way too often for my taste... and this is merely self-protection at this point. You know, getting close to people is a very unhealthy thing in this forum. For one simple reason: every time a close friend passes away, and this will eventually happen in a forum like this, it will crush you. No doubt. That's a very hurtful process and it's though to deal with.

I've seen so many friends go. I just need to go through my message history and count all the members with a crossed name to get a sense of the sheer amount of dead accounts... and keep in mind, with each passing day, this grave yard in this forum, this sad desert of goodbye threads is becoming larger and larger. Every goodbye thread means one more dead member. And considering the amount of members that aren't active anymore, at this point... It's very possible that the amount of dead members already outweigh the living ones.

I don't like when people leave, suicide is tragic and I wish nobody would have to feel the need to end their life but I also understand that this is a cruel world and people in this community are suffering a lot. Not all of us receive help. Not all of us can be helped. And maybe some don't even want help. I'm also done struggling and for many of us, suicide is the only way out. I know the many stories of the people here, I've talked to them... for the last 2.5 years, the reasons why people ctb are as diverse as they could be and I'm grateful that we have this place that allows every struggling individual to have a voice and a place to talk about their suffering. This forum fulfills a very important role in that aspect, a role that is often ignored by society.

And if you look at the amount of active members that registered back in 2018, it will give you some decent insight into this subject from my perspective. There simply aren't many of us left. It's just a tiny handful of people and I'm confident most of them passed away. Some hopefully made it successfully into recovery. I really hope it, I'm very glad when people find an escape to their struggling. But what I'm about to say: this cycle - people passing away, new people arriving - is never gonna end. In 2 years, it's possible that 2019 members will be extremely rare minority as well. This forum is like a train station, we're all heading towards our destination. And those destinations might look very different depending on your goals and wishes. Some decide to give life another chance and keep their journey going. But many of us - me included - are waiting for that one-way bus that never comes back.

This hit me really hard. You are one of the few people here I can actually fully relate to.I have observed the same cycle. It's sad, you're right SS is just a train station but I just can't seem to move on.
hugs

 

[Endeavour]

Gromit gave me his cell phone number. Wanted to be with him during his final moments. I've sent a message yesterday just to talk to him in the "afterlife" the message was delivered and read. Probably some family member has it I guess. Anyways I didn't say much. Just wrote that I miss him still and will always do. Won't to it again just in case.

I guess if he were still with us he'd let us know?

 

[K-O]

@K-O ?

She was last on Tuesday at 3:21 PM I pm'd her just to check in.

She's basically recovered. I think she just checks in every once and a while now.

y'all! k-o is o-k and thanks you for being your lovely selves! x

 

[Brick In The Wall]

y'all! k-o is o-k and thanks you for being your lovely selves! x

We love ya too KO! It's definitely good to hear you're doing ok. We're here for ya anytime. If I may make a small request though it's that you reach out to @BlackPoppet. She may be leaving us soon

 

[K-O]

We love ya too KO! It's definitely good to hear you're doing ok. We're here for ya anytime. If I may make a small request though it's that you reach out to @BlackPoppet. She may be leaving us soon

hiya love thank you! and yes i just wrote her now and waiting to hear from her.. x

 

[KuriGohan&Kamehameha]

I really miss Gromit and Ecmnesia :(

 

[omoidarui]

i haven't seen user @Soul post recently

gotta look out for fellow members of the class of April 2019, there's not many of us left.

 

[WinterFaust]

If by any chance @WinterFaust is still active and sees this, I'd hope she is in recovery!

I am, friend! I am! Thank you so so much for thinking of me. I'm not active on the site anymore but I'm alive and kicking. Slowly and painfully kicking, but kicking nonetheless

 

[Sherri]

Wanna wish a happy Chrismas to @Meditation guide , @Underscore and @Jumper Geo . Hugs to you 3.

 

[Brick In The Wall]

Any word on @Silvermorning ?

 

[Jumper Geo]

Wanna wish a happy Chrismas to @Meditation guide , @Underscore and @Jumper Geo . Hugs to you 3.

Thank you Sherri and



Merry Christmas all.

Cheers

Geo

 

[Sherri]

Thank you Sherri and
View attachment 56290

Merry Christmas all.

Cheers

Geo

Ahhhh my Geo thank you, my best present so far.

 

[BitterlyAlive_]

Did puppy9 self-ban?

 

[Nymph]

Did puppy9 self-ban?

Yep, I think it was yesterday:(

 

[BitterlyAlive_]

Yep, I think it was yesterday:(

Aw man. I'm gonna miss him. I hope he's okay

 

[Brick In The Wall]

Aw man. I'm gonna miss him. I hope he's okay

Unfortunately he self banned to do the 48 hr SN regimen.

 

[BitterlyAlive_]

Unfortunately he self banned to do the 48 hr SN regimen.

Oh, fuck...

 

[Brick In The Wall]

Oh, fuck...

Yea... he's tried before tho so it's a coin toss I suppose.

 

[BitterlyAlive_]

Yea... he's tried before tho so it's a coin toss I suppose.

Well, thank you for letting me know. I appreciate it...

 

[Jumper Geo]

Aw man. I'm gonna miss him. I hope he's okay

 

[Deleted member 1465]

Wanna wish a happy Chrismas to @Meditation guide , @Underscore and @Jumper Geo . Hugs to you 3.

Thank you dear, a Happy Christmas to you too!

 

[Sherri]

Thank you dear, a Happy Christmas to you too!
View attachment 56310

Thanks darling. You're amazing!

 

[Sensei]

Does anyone know what's happened to @Uh huh?

 

[Sherri]

I want to wish all my fellow ops here who celebrate Christmas, that may you have a good one, I know most of us are not in the spirit for it. But still I want to wish you all well tonight and tomorrow, in fact always, Also to all mods and Administrators. For keeping us safe always and forever. A big group hug to my entire fellow ops. Edit, and let's keep in mind the many people who will spend Xmas alone here on SS and on the streets.

 

[Butterflyshadow]

I feel so alone.. also during this day since I left with my ex and I don't talk with my family..
Are someone passing Christmas alone and with sadness? I feel so out of the world and so alone..

 

[Sherri]

I feel so alone.. also during this day since I left with my ex and I don't talk with my family..
Are someone passing Christmas alone and with sadness? I feel so out of the world and so alone..

I wanted to pass it alone, but been invited to a place I dont want to go, I rather be here with my family keeping you company. A big hug to you. If you feel very alone my phone is with me Pm me ok? Hugs hun.