Everyday I just realize how fucking useless I am compared to everybody around me. How is it everything so easy for other people? How is it that no matter what stage I'm at in life, I'm always falling behind other people? I'm shit at everything, an idiot, terrible at everything I've ever tried to do. Everyday it feel like my brain starts to lag behind more, with me no longer even remembering the days I get pass by. Everyday is the same, my useless self being as terrible as I always am.
This song came to mind
"How come they can roll? God tell me how come they can smoke, they can drink?
They get to do whatever they want and it don't interrupt the way they think
They all get to be regular, why is it only me this odd?
Me who can't even stand up straight, me who can't even keep a job
Maybe I'm asking for too much, a tiny piece of normalcy
Or an answer to any one of my fucking prayers that's asking what's wrong with me
Maybe I'm tired of being unique, tired of being that outcast
I'm tired of me being the only one, so tired of you all not knowing about that
I'm tired of it all, want me to fall a spectacle, for the crowd to see
Or being the only one with faith, I'm tired of everybody doubting me
I'm tired of responding to grown ass folks that think so motha fuckin childishly
Aches, wish I could take my parents' genes the fuck up out of me
Tired of wanting to run somewhere, tired of having to bare it all
Tired of you fucks constantly taking from me and I'm willing to share it all
Tired of being objective, I'm tired of having to hear it all
But being alone is the only way I know to never be near it all."
