Trying partial suspension tonight

[bruisedmind]

I'm surprised I'm still here, not really sure why I am to be honest. My parents have hidden anything I can harm myself with, but I've found a bath robe cord and I'm going to try partial suspension again tonight. It's never really worked before, SI kicks in and it feels like my head might explode from the pressure. Is there an easier way so that I just go unconscious before feeling any real pain? I just don't want to be here anymore I've lost everything and I don't think I'll be able to recover from it this time. I feel so lost and hopeless and I don't have any other options anymore, nothing else will take this pain away

 

[Soul]

I'm sorry about everything that's led you to contemplate this. Have you looked at the List of Resources near the top of the forum? There's a "megathread" about it, including suggestions for making things more comfortable. I hope you won't rush into this, and that you'll make good decisions for yourself. x
You might want to read this thread too:

https://sanctioned-suicide.net/thre...perventilation-i-think-i-got-my-method.15004/

 

[The Mute Viking]

It breaks my heart to see another beautiful soul going through these kinds of things.
This world is so full of empty, lonely hearts seeking purpose and love.
I wish you could have found it.

I hope that you find the peace you need and you're not rushing to do this.

 

[xMacy]

Hi, new member here. I am also contemplating tonight using the same. I found, with practice, it's more about kind of going limp with the ligature resting right under where your jawbone connects, right under your ears, then resting the head in a forward position to be most effective at passing out. Obviously with time, you go. I dont know if that helps, but that is what works for me

 

[xMacy]

Haven't heard anything from the OP, dont mean to double post, just checking in. Hope you're okay with your decision or if you're still contemplating, let me know :) would like to talk with someone with the same mindset, if you're up to it

 

[bruisedmind]

I am still contemplating, I was tired last night and attempts take a lot of strength, so I just slept. I wish I could think of another way

 

[xMacy]

I am still contemplating, I was tired last night and attempts take a lot of strength, so I just slept. I wish I could think of another way

Well I can say I'm glad to see your response today :) if it helps, maybe a downer before? I'm definitely not encouraging, but if you need support, I'm here!

 

[bruisedmind]

I'm not glad. I want this to be over. I told my key worker I want to kill my self today, I don't really know if that was a good idea or not

 

[xMacy]

I'm not glad. I want this to be over. I told my key worker I want to kill my self today, I don't really know if that was a good idea or not

Hopefully it's okay, dont want to end up in the psych ward.. been there multiple times and it's not fun.

 

[bruisedmind]

Hopefully it's okay, dont want to end up in the psych ward.. been there multiple times and it's not fun.

Me either, I spent February and March there

 

[xMacy]

Me either, I spent February and March there

Oh wow, that's crazy. Did you have to lie your way out or did they deem you better?

 

[ron_g]

I found, with practice, it's more about kind of going limp with the ligature resting right under where your jawbone connects, right under your ears, then resting the head in a forward position to be most effective at passing out.

What do you mean by "resting the head in a forward position"? What position is your head when you have "the ligature resting right under where your jawbone connects"? How would someone assume the position that helped you?

 

[xMacy]

What do you mean by "resting the head in a forward position"? What position is your head when you have "the ligature resting right under where your jawbone connects"? How would someone assume the position that helped you?

Sitting down with your knees under you, the ligature secured behind you, say on a rod in the closet, leaning your torso forward to apply pressure and more or less looking down in a neutral position. Also, using a soft, thin stretchy fabric seems to help with the digging and is just enough pressure to hit the artery vs the windpipe.

Sorry my first description wasnt very clear. Does this make more sense?

 

[bruisedmind]

Oh wow, that's crazy. Did you have to lie your way out or did they deem you better?

They deemed me better, medication and stuff calmed me down a good bit. I didn't really talk to anyone so I'm surprised they let me go but this is the UK and they need the bed space before you even leave.

Based on the tips I hope I can finally pull it off this evening. I've got no hope left, nothing worth staying around for. No one loves me, especially those I wish would. I'm tired of being beaten down, used, made to feel worthless. Some might say I'm letting them win, I disagree. Letting them win is staying around to let it keep happening

 

[xMacy]

They deemed me better, medication and stuff calmed me down a good bit. I didn't really talk to anyone so I'm surprised they let me go but this is the UK and they need the bed space before you even leave.

Based on the tips I hope I can finally pull it off this evening. I've got no hope left, nothing worth staying around for. No one loves me, especially those I wish would. I'm tired of being beaten down, used, made to feel worthless. Some might say I'm letting them win, I disagree. Letting them win is staying around to let it keep happening

I'm honestly right there with you about tonight.. I hope to be done myself

 

[Charlielodge]

Well I hope you find peace whatever you decide to do, getting tired of it myself.. just feeling like a pointless existence right now

 

[xMacy]

Well I hope you find peace whatever you decide to do, getting tired of it myself.. just feeling like a pointless existence right now

I hope so too. Just simply silence is all I wish for. I also hope you're able to find that peace

 

[omoidarui]

i love you bruh

 

[Kikoo Loool]

Hi, new member here. I am also contemplating tonight using the same. I found, with practice, it's more about kind of going limp with the ligature resting right under where your jawbone connects, right under your ears, then resting the head in a forward position to be most effective at passing out. Obviously with time, you go. I dont know if that helps, but that is what works for me

Welcome! I'm considering too this method, concurrently with SN. I'm the OP of the thread quoted above. I leaved the idea of hyperventilating since I got my sweet spot. I would like very much to share efficient means of partially hanging.

 

[xMacy]

Welcome! I'm considering too this method, concurrently with SN. I'm the OP of the thread quoted above. I leaved the idea of hyperventilating since I got my sweet spot. I would like very much to share efficient means of partially hanging.

What has worked for you?? I tried last night, the ligature broke after blackout however. I've heard of SN, but haven't really researched it. How would that help??

 

[echo_bravo]

What has worked for you?? I tried last night, the ligature broke after blackout however. I've heard of SN, but haven't really researched it. How would that help??

I think the idea might be a failsafe in case the suspension goes wrong? I suppose if you blacked out and the ligature broke the SN would get to you while you were out. I hadn't considered these methods together myself.

 

[xMacy]

I think the idea might be a failsafe in case the suspension goes wrong? I suppose if you blacked out and the ligature broke the SN would get to you while you were out. I hadn't considered these methods together myself.

Ohh okay. Based on the threads I've read on SN, most people recommend taking other medications with it. If I'm remembering correctly, you need a prescription for one of them. To me at least, that seems like overkill.. although I guess better safe than sorry?

Also, I've heard that if you place the ligature around something heavy and hang it off the side of say, a bed, that's a pretty comfy way to go. Might give that a try if I cant get the other way to work..

 

[Kjo]

I'd imagine the night night method might be better than hanging.

Much love. Please vent or reach out and do what's best for you. I think we can all relate here. Hope the pain eases.

 

[echo_bravo]

Ohh okay. Based on the threads I've read on SN, most people recommend taking other medications with it. If I'm remembering correctly, you need a prescription for one of them. To me at least, that seems like overkill.. although I guess better safe than sorry?

Also, I've heard that if you place the ligature around something heavy and hang it off the side of say, a bed, that's a pretty comfy way to go. Might give that a try if I cant get the other way to work..

Pretty much, there's a fair bit of prep for SN from what I understand. The prescription part is for strong enough anti-emetics. Honestly I'm not a great bluffer so I'd be terrified to ask my doctor for them. If done right partial should be good enough on its own. I've tried it several times now though with no real success but that's maybe more my fault personally.

I think I've heard of hanging something off the bed and it sounds more pleasant! Although I worry it may be less reliable or trickier to set up. I may look into this more.

 

[xMacy]

I'd imagine the night night method might be better than hanging.

Much love. Please vent or reach out and do what's best for you. I think we can all relate here. Hope the pain eases.

I have not heard of that method. Is there some place here I can get more information on this?

 

[echo_bravo]

My most recent attempt at partial was a year or so back, I think I'm maybe in a better headspace to try it again. I just really, really don't want to end up in the psych ward again. The psych wards where I am in NY are a complete joke.

Night Night I started looking into. Isn't there a mega thread on that in the resources? Or did I read about it somewhere else.
Edit: Found it, I thought I had seen one.

https://sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/the-night-night-method-mega-thread.6834/

 

[xMacy]

Pretty much, there's a fair bit of prep for SN from what I understand. The prescription part is for strong enough anti-emetics. Honestly I'm not a great bluffer so I'd be terrified to ask my doctor for them. If done right partial should be good enough on its own. I've tried it several times now though with no real success but that's maybe more my fault personally.

I think I've heard of hanging something off the bed and it sounds more pleasant! Although I worry it may be less reliable or trickier to set up. I may look into this more.

Yeah, that's why I haven't tried it yet. Also, if you share a bed with someone, then ruin it, kind of a dick move I think..

And yes, it seems almost tedious to try SN.. that's something I wouldn't want to mess up. Plus going to the dr... no thanks.

Why do you think you haven't had good success?

My most recent attempt at partial was a year or so back, I think I'm maybe in a better headspace to try it again. I just really, really don't want to end up in the psych ward again. The psych wards where I am in NY are a complete joke.

Night Night I started looking into. Isn't there a mega thread on that in the resources? Or did I read about it somewhere else.
Edit: Found it, I thought I had seen one.

https://sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/the-night-night-method-mega-thread.6834/

Thanks! Also, I'm in NY and at least the ones I've been to, are also a waste of time and resources.

 

[echo_bravo]

Why do you think you haven't had good success?

Willpower maybe? Some unconscious drive seemed to be preventing me from getting there 100% at the time I last tried it. Things changed, got better, then worse, and I'm back to where I was then with the knowledge that this is never really going to resolve. Which is why I think I may be in a better spot as far as carrying it out goes.

Thanks! Also, I'm in NY and at least the ones I've been to, are also a waste of time and resources.

Yeah, around WNY at least there's nothing of value in terms of mental health facilities. It's a complete mess.

Pretty much the reason I'm afraid to try and screw up partial suspension again. I was told one time when I was there I was going to get an x-ray to ensure I hadn't screwed up my neck. They promptly forgot and never checked which just made me laugh.

 

[xMacy]

Willpower maybe? Some unconscious drive seemed to be preventing me from getting there 100% at the time I last tried it. Things changed, got better, then worse, and I'm back to where I was then with the knowledge that this is never really going to resolve. Which is why I think I may be in a better spot as far as carrying it out goes.


Yeah, around WNY at least there's nothing of value in terms of mental health facilities. It's a complete mess.

Pretty much the reason I'm afraid to try and screw up partial suspension again. I was told one time when I was there I was going to get an x-ray to ensure I hadn't screwed up my neck. They promptly forgot and never checked which just made me laugh.-

I'm also in WNY! Small world!!

I've also been in the same situation myself, things get better, get worse.. a never ending cycle it seems. So I can definitely relate to you on that.

 

[echo_bravo]

I'm also in WNY! Small world!!

I've also been in the same situation myself, things get better, get worse.. a never ending cycle it seems. So I can definitely relate to you on that.

Oh nice! Then you definitely know the pathetic state of our mental health care haha.

That's pretty much where I've been at for many years. My problem is unsolvable in my current "state" of mind I suppose? I've been patching things up and they always come back. A matter of deciding what to do about it I guess.

They deemed me better, medication and stuff calmed me down a good bit. I didn't really talk to anyone so I'm surprised they let me go but this is the UK and they need the bed space before you even leave.

Based on the tips I hope I can finally pull it off this evening. I've got no hope left, nothing worth staying around for. No one loves me, especially those I wish would. I'm tired of being beaten down, used, made to feel worthless. Some might say I'm letting them win, I disagree. Letting them win is staying around to let it keep happening

How are you doing, OP? I've had a lot of these same thoughts. Hope you can make peace with your situation. I see a lot of stuff I've said before here..