Method Train Method? Bystanders?

[gardenofaphrodite]

I recently moved back to an area where there is a train that comes through pretty frequently. Just a normal freight train.

I'm aware it's a very violent & messy method, however I'm unsure if SN is even in the question anymore (fear of police + lack of privacy+money). Other methods are out of the question, even partial or full hanging. It would have to be something like a train or bridge, or cutting/stabbing myself but I just can't do that. A train seems to be my only way I can successfully go now, but I keep thinking about the mess police will have to clean up, & I'll be putting a huge mark into the town + county (its been having pretty terrible shit happen the last few years & has had two incredibly violent/strange murders recently). I don't want to leave a huge ass mess with press coverage, I want to be forgotten & only remembered by the people I care about. Idk what to do & I want some opinions on it.


TL;DR
Is it unfair to bystanders to clean up & witness someone doing this? Is it immoral?

Could it cause unwanted media coverage? Should I consider that? Are there ways to avoid it?

What should I consider prior to jumping in front of a train? Is there a way this can fail?

If one were to fail, how severe have injuries been? (Links fo threads or news articles would be helpful)

Does anyone have better suggestions/threads to methods for someone who has lack of privacy + money?

Would it be okay to take meds to OD as well prior to jumping in case of failure? Would medical staff catch the OD?

 

[glitterypearls]

you are going to get comments calling you selfish because it happen in every train post. I want you to know you aren't selfish for that. as you said methods are hard to get and this is your only option. you know what best for you and don't let other people make you feel like you are selfish or a bad person.

- It's a bit unfair and it will traumatize them especially the bystanders because most people will forever be traumatized by watching someone die especially in such a violent way
- there will be coverage, I don't know where you live but if it was a small town then there will be a lot of coverage, you can't avoid it. death by trains are always going to be remembered because it's a violent method
- I don't have an answer for that since I didn't research the method as much as I can but it seem to fail when people hesitate from SI kicking in which will cause them to lose their legs or something like that. I watched a netflix EP on a girl who used train to CTB (unsolved mysteries new season, the first EP) she just stood in front of the train without moving and that did the job but do your OWN research because this is the method that YOU DO NOT want to fail at it
- I'd suggest if you can is to go to any gore site and search for train suicide and you will see a lot of fails but this might scare you from doing the method but I think you should watch it to be aware of the risks. reading about it isn't the same as watching it, but that's only IF YOU CAN
- I suggest you also look at goodbye threads and see what methods people used which will help you a lot

this is my least favorite method, if it fails your life would be so much worse. it's violent and will traumatize other people so if you can wait till you have money & privacy to attempt other methods then I suggest you do that. I don't like when comment that the person is selfish for this because yes it's the worse method but most people who use it are desperate, in pain and have no access to other methods. we don't need to shame them on top of all that. I wish you the best. remember the choice IS YOURS. don't rush it and do your own research. you don't wanna be impulsive and end up making your life even worse.

 

[gardenofaphrodite]

I appreciate this reply, I've thought of a bridge but there's just not any high enough in my area. A train is genuinely my only option outside of slitting my wrists (which I just can't do because of SI & I have a fear of seeing my own blood/wounds to the point of passing out). I'm so scared of failure, & because it's a freight train & not one that has people on it other than the train operator, I feel will help avoid traumatizing as many people. I would have to do it at night regardless, I want to avoid as many people as possible witnessing the initial act. The aftermath the police will have to deal with, which I do feel bad about but it's part of their job unfortunately.

Just struggling to find a method now, I was going to buy SN but with police becoming an issue & now privacy (due to eviction, had to move back in with my family), I lost a lot of options for methods. I was also considering partial-hanging, which in theory I could still do? But it would be incredibly risky (lack of privacy/someone is ALWAYS home). Something I can do at night in a location other than my home is all I have now, & it fucking sucks. Was really hopeful for getting access to the SN method but now it's unrealistic to even try to gather the items for it, I have most of the things I need, all I'm missing is the SN, it's very frustrating.

 

[SoftWorries]

Some years ago a highschool classmate of mine died either by accident or on purpose speeding into a snow removal truck in bad weather.

Images of the accident ended up on gore websites online unfortunately. This can sometimes happen with a brutal public death.

 

[gardenofaphrodite]

I just hate that if I do go through with that method, it'll have media coverage. I doubt someone would film it (would be going out late at night) so I wouldn't have the risk of a video leaking online. I just don't want to tarnish the name of where I live more than it has been, & a lot of locals know me, especially in the town next to mine (where I grew up). I just feel it would be detrimental to some to hear of my death in that violent way- but it's becoming my only realistic option.