S
shadow11
Wizard
- Jul 31, 2018
- 619
I want to ctb so bad but every time I get on the chair to kick it away the panic and survival instinct kicks in. I can get far enough off to start blacking out but that's where it ends. Help!
I have both I just have to make sure cant run out of clonazepam if it doesn't work. Dr would never give me more . I take them every day for paralyzing anxiety. How many do you think it would take. I only take 2 mg a day now.You havnt tried after a few clonazepam+wine. That should make the difference.
Thank you5mg with wine should be enough. So it's only 3mg more than a normal day.
Will I pass out before I get it doneThats = to 100mg diazepam which is a big dose for anyone
Boredom is certainly not an evil to be taken lightly: it will ultimately etch lines of true despair onto any face.
Arthur Schopenhauer
The survival instinct is what's getting me. I get the rope around my neck tighten it step off the chair and when things start turning black I back out. Damn this I'm not afraid of dying but my body wont let me.Story of my life (and by extension the inability to end it). Too disgusted/disinterested to "live", too held back by crude biological forces like the damnable survival instinct to die. One of the worst predicaments there is. The boredom, the frustration, the restlessness, the suffocating anhedonic ennui of it all. If only this shit had some kind of fatal quality attached to it that would snuff me out in a matter of months. Death by literal boredom. It would be such a wonderfully fitting way for me to go out. Giant fuck you to this worthless universe.