Venting Too scared to get a job to pay for a ticket for the bus

[Mistiie]

The method I'll be using is an excessive amount of morphine, like several grams or so of oral solution, plus an antiemetic of some kind to prevent me from throwing it back up, and finally some very high proof alcohol to hopefully boost the effects of the morphine on me.

Only issue is, to get all of the components, it costs around £1,000 for me. I'm hesitant to start selling stuff on eBay or whatever in case it fails and I'm just left with no possessions of any kind, but at the same time I'm not too excited about the prospect of working for a month or two, earning enough money to pay for it, and then just quitting and doing it. I'm super anxious in general and the idea of a job kind of terrifies me, plus I'm not exactly the most 'presentable' person you would ever see (long hair, generally unkempt appearance, etc.) so I don't think anyone would even hire me unless they were desperate.

Other than selling all my shit, which would also look suspicious by the way, or getting a job (where no one would hire me or would pay me pennies), I don't know how I should go about making money. I really desperately want a job to go and pay for the stuff I need but I'm absolutely terrified of it.

 

[daydreams]

What about getting money from your parents?

 

[Mistiie]

What about getting money from your parents?

I don't want to leech off of them more than I already have. Plus, they're likely to question my need for ~£1,000 quite quickly, and I don't exactly have a valid excuse for that.

 

[PrettyPotato]

Is the £1k for the morphine? That seems like a lot! (although never tried buying any so could well be the going rate for all I know).

0% credit card perhaps? As for appearance, wouldn't worry about it.
Either remote work ,or even better remote work in an IT field would get you where you needed to be imho. I was in IT and haven't worn anything outside of tshirt, etc for years!