Tomorrow is the day. My method will be gunshot too the head via gun range rental.

[evey8112]

Tomorrow is the day, I have had enough of the depression and the mood swings my mind has been playing on me for too long now. I thought if i got a new car i would be happier well got that and still depressed. i thought well if i get a job that allows me to work on my own time i would be happier well got that too and still fucking depressed. I have these spouts of intense joy and motivation then its goes down fucking hill. I should be happy, by society standards i SHOULD be happy and i am not. I can say money will not make u happy because mental illness bypasses all that shit. I have tried to make my life better, I have tried to be a good son to be a good brother too help others to try and love myself but it seems i take a step forward and get shoved 5 steps back. To put it simply i am just tied soooo tired of it all. I just want a deep rest and for me death is the ultimate release. Am i a bit scared? yes but i know i will not have to deal with any of this bullshit any longer. I am tired of putting on a mask for society that is not me or who i am. Tired of being someone i am not. I just want to be free from the suffering of this human brain. If i could do that without suicide i would and trust me i have been too a therapist and have been put on medication which BTW does not do shit but cover up a bleeding hole in the head so to speak. If you are still reading this THANK YOU for taking the time. well i guess this is it i hope the rest of u find peace and i will see u all on the other side.

 

[Huntfish34]

Damn , wow. I can relate to almost everything you said. Sorry you are going through all of that.

Money Can buy you happiness, but it's Temporary and doesn't really matter in the grand scheme of things. Ya know? I will be going by gunshot soon myself, Almost did it the other day but my Damn fckn SI got the best of me.

Thoughts and prayers to you in whatever may happen, Godspeed brother. ♥ Always. -

 

[Banshee]

Don't ctb via a gun range. You're going to completely fuck up other people's lives, be the cause of traumatic PTSD and potential have their business shut down.

 

[DukeDestroyer]

Shotgun to the head is my ctb method. I don't even have a shotgun. I'm thinking of the mossberg 500 will be my choice.

 

[stermc]

I am so sorry to hear that you have been through so much pain and disappointment. Life is not easy, nor is death. But I hope you are making a conscious decision and, if that's what you really want, I wish you freedom and peace.
May you rest, finally.
Thank you for sharing your feelings and thoughts and I wish you were proud of how strong you have been just to be alive.
I am here in case you need to talk.
Wishing you a peaceful journey.

 

[Banshee]

Shotgun to the head is my ctb method. I don't even have a shotgun. I'm thinking of the mossberg 500 will be my choice.

Unless the Mossberg 500 has meaning to you the gun is irrelevant, the gauge works all the same in any gun it fits.

 

[Huntfish34]

Yeaa of course, a 12 is a 12 and a 20 is a 20... but you don't have to be rude about it. I've often said that I will go out with my Rem. 870.... So What ? Of course they all work the same. He's just letting us know his choice to ctb.

 

[annointed_towers]

I've thought of this too but my local gun range won't rent to anyone who comes in by themselves

 

[evey8112]

Damn , wow. I can relate to almost everything you said. Sorry you are going through all of that.

Money Can buy you happiness, but it's Temporary and doesn't really matter in the grand scheme of things. Ya know? I will be going by gunshot soon myself, Almost did it the other day but my Damn fckn SI got the best of me.

Thoughts and prayers to you in whatever may happen, Godspeed brother. ♥ Always. -

Yea for me in my state i cant buy a firearm without being a resident so the only other option is to rent one.

 

[Banshee]

Yeaa of course, a 12 is a 12 and a 20 is a 20... but you don't have to be rude about it. I've often said that I will go out with my Rem. 870.... So What ? Of course they all work the same. He's just letting us know his choice to ctb.

Stating a fact isn't rude. Main reason I said it is because they is a severe lack of knowledge when it comes to firearms on this site. I seen a post about someone saying they're going to use an AR-15 bullet... You can get AR-15 in almost every chamber. Someone could go out and buy an AR-15 chambered in .22lr thinking "well it's an AR-15, so this will definitely work" and then end up with realizing that the hole in their head is about the same size as the straw their live-in nurse feeds them through.

 

[evey8112]

Don't ctb via a gun range. You're going to completely fuck up other people's lives, be the cause of traumatic PTSD and potential have their business shut down.

This may sound selfish and maybe it is but at this point i do not fucking care. i am so done with putting others first fuck that i have put others first my whole life and my death will be in my control for once i will make the last choice.

 

[Banshee]

Yea for me in my state i cant buy a firearm without being a resident so the only other option is to rent one.

I think literally any other option and method should be you're next course of action. Don't be a piece of shit and ruin other's lives just because you can't buy your own. If you live in USA, you have zero excuses.

This may sound selfish and maybe it is but at this point i do not fucking care. i am so done with putting others first fuck that i have put others first my whole life and my death will be in my control for once i will make the last choice.

Fuck you then. If you're willing to fuck other people over because of your own selfishness, then I hope you fail and end up a vegetable.

 

[Huntfish34]

Yea for me in my state i cant buy a firearm without being a resident so the only other option is to rent one.

I understand without a doubt , do what you gotta do. I wish you Nothing but the best , Godspeed. ♥

 

[SexyIncél]

Fuck you then. If you're willing to fuck other people over because of your own selfishness, then I hope you fail and end up a vegetable.

While I agree it's harmful (even to fellow suicidal people) to do this at a shooting range... maybe people can privately help @evey8112 figure out a better way to go

The monsters who make the rules make it ridiculously hard to do anything without hurting others

Shotgun to the head is my ctb method. I don't even have a shotgun. I'm thinking of the mossberg 500 will be my choice.

Careful. If the Mossberg 500's barrel doesn't fit in the mouth, you may be creeped out at how it'll shoot through your teeth. Remington 870 Tac-14 may be nicer. I know, I find the Mossberg cuter, and Remingtons are too beloved by cops. If that's a problem, you can put cute stickers on it

Now, their "stock" (the part behind the trigger) may cause you problems at some shooting ranges. If you buy them with that small stock that's hard to brace against your shoulder. So if you want shooting range practice, call to ask if they'll let you use the want you to have a "pistol grip stock". If so, you may have to get the gun store to upgrade it

Of course, you can try another shotgun... hopefully at a chill gun store where the workers won't see you handling the gun in a suicide-curious way

 

[evey8112]

I think literally any other option and method should be you're next course of action. Don't be a piece of shit and ruin other's lives just because you can't buy your own. If you live in USA, you have zero excuses.

Fuck you then. If you're willing to fuck other people over because of your own selfishness, then I hope you fail and end up a vegetable

its funny you say "fuck over other people" yet u fail to realize if you had a successful CTB your own family and friends would be fucked over by your actions emotionally for life.

 

[WhiteRabbit]

its funny you say "fuck over other people" yet u fail to realize if you had a successful CTB your own family and friends would be fucked over by your actions emotionally for life.

I feel like that's a bit different than witnessing someones violent suicide or having your business harmed because someone couldn't just get a rope instead.

 

[locked*n*loaded]

I'm sorry you find yourself at this place in your life and I wish you peace no matter how you need to find it for yourself. Suicide is inherently a selfish act, and there's nothing wrong with that, and if I had to resort to the method of the OP, I'd put my needs above others, too. They'll get over it.

 

[SamTam33]

its funny you say "fuck over other people" yet u fail to realize if you had a successful CTB your own family and friends would be fucked over by your actions emotionally for life.

It's always amusing how personal some people take another person's suicide.

Die like they want you to die OR ELSE! Amusing, indeed.

I wouldn't want to involve anyone else in my ctb either, but I guarantee they hear about worse shit on the news and don't bat an eye.

They rubberneck on the highway at major car accidents (hoping for a front row seat to maximum destruction?)

They blow out the guts of deer and duck during hunting season.

They're literally practicing how to rip through living organisms with bullets at the shooting range FFS.

They'll deal.

 

[lifeisbutadream]

I think literally any other option and method should be you're next course of action. Don't be a piece of shit and ruin other's lives just because you can't buy your own. If you live in USA, you have zero excuses.

Fuck you then. If you're willing to fuck other people over because of your own selfishness, then I hope you fail and end up a vegetable.

I agree with you, tho i wldnt go as far as the last thing u said.

OP - reconsider that plan, if for no other reason than they are alert to this danger there at the gun range, and they may not even rent a gun to someone alone, and then you will be so rushed, and they will be screaming, and thus you may aim wrong and indeed end up a vegetable.

 

[Banshee]

its funny you say "fuck over other people" yet u fail to realize if you had a successful CTB your own family and friends would be fucked over by your actions emotionally for life.

I'm sorry to say, but if you think losing a loved one to ctb is just as traumatic to physically watching someone blow their head into pieces, you're a fucking idiot.

It's always amusing how personal some people take another person's suicide.

Die like they want you to die OR ELSE! Amusing, indeed.

I wouldn't want to involve anyone else in my ctb either, but I guarantee they hear about worse shit on the news and don't bat an eye.

They rubberneck on the highway at major car accidents (hoping for a front row seat to maximum destruction?)

They blow out the guts of deer and duck during hunting season.

They're literally practicing how to rip through living organisms with bullets at the shooting range FFS.

They'll deal.

I literally don't care how they ctb, I'm just saying that if you plan on potentially destroying strangers lives because you're too much of a loser to man up and do it properly, than yeah, fuck them. I hope the worst for them.

Also, you're an idiot if you think every single person that goes shooting is "practicing how to rip through living organisms". You know nothing about firearms and are just as much of a loser as OP.

 

[FuneralCry]

Your feelings of wishing to escape from this awful world really are understandable, to me there is nothing that sounds more ideal than being able to permanently rest. I hope that you find the freedom that you wish for.

 

[SamTam33]

I'm sorry to say, but if you think losing a loved one to ctb is just as traumatic to physically watching someone blow their head into pieces, you're a fucking idiot.

I literally don't care how they ctb, I'm just saying that if you plan on potentially destroying strangers lives because you're too much of a loser to man up and do it properly, than yeah, fuck them. I hope the worst for them.

Also, you're an idiot if you think every single person that goes shooting is "practicing how to rip through living organisms". You know nothing about firearms and are just as much of a loser as OP.

I hope I win the lottery. "Hopes" don't mean anything.

Look at you, Mister Sassy Pants Tough Guy cursing people out on the internet because they don't agree with you...

Talk about losers: pot meet kettle.

 

[Cathy Ames]

OP - reconsider that plan, if for no other reason than they are alert to this danger there at the gun range, and they may not even rent a gun to someone alone, and then you will be so rushed, and they will be screaming, and thus you may aim wrong and indeed end up a vegetable.

This is a very good point. Somewhere on the internet there is a video of two guys at a range taking selfies. One of them (I assume jokingly) started to point his weapon at his buddy's head (for a selfie?), and the range master shut it down nearly instantly. I'm not sure he had it pointed at the other guy for even a split second.

 

[Ligottian]

I tell people I own guns for home defense, but the main reason is having a reliable suicide method.

Step 1: Dissolve my rather large stash of benzos in a glass of water. Then down the hatch.
Step 2: Lie on my left side on the floor.
Step 3: Press loaded .357 Magnum loaded with hollow points above right ear.
Step 4: Cock gun and pull trigger.

If that doesn't kill me, I'll KNOW I'm cursed.

 

[SweetSacrifice]

OP - reconsider that plan, if for no other reason than they are alert to this danger there at the gun range, and they may not even rent a gun to someone alone, and then you will be so rushed, and they will be screaming, and thus you may aim wrong and indeed end up a vegetable.

I have little experience with guns as I'm in the UK but I anticipate controls would be pretty tight, especially if someone new comes in alone. You might be better off if you were already a regular there to begin with. Is there no other option for you to get hold of a gun? The way our news gets reported makes it seem like anyone, even children, can get hold of them fairly easily.

 

[BBBB]

Tomorrow is the day, I have had enough of the depression and the mood swings my mind has been playing on me for too long now. I thought if i got a new car i would be happier well got that and still depressed. i thought well if i get a job that allows me to work on my own time i would be happier well got that too and still fucking depressed. I have these spouts of intense joy and motivation then its goes down fucking hill. I should be happy, by society standards i SHOULD be happy and i am not. I can say money will not make u happy because mental illness bypasses all that shit. I have tried to make my life better, I have tried to be a good son to be a good brother too help others to try and love myself but it seems i take a step forward and get shoved 5 steps back. To put it simply i am just tied soooo tired of it all. I just want a deep rest and for me death is the ultimate release. Am i a bit scared? yes but i know i will not have to deal with any of this bullshit any longer. I am tired of putting on a mask for society that is not me or who i am. Tired of being someone i am not. I just want to be free from the suffering of this human brain. If i could do that without suicide i would and trust me i have been too a therapist and have been put on medication which BTW does not do shit but cover up a bleeding hole in the head so to speak. If you are still reading this THANK YOU for taking the time. well i guess this is it i hope the rest of u find peace and i will see u all on the other side.

How are you feeling today?

 

[Per Ardua Ad Astra]

I agree with you, tho i wldnt go as far as the last thing u said.

OP - reconsider that plan, if for no other reason than they are alert to this danger there at the gun range, and they may not even rent a gun to someone alone, and then you will be so rushed, and they will be screaming, and thus you may aim wrong and indeed end up a vegetable.

OP … your urgency is understood… but

Strong possibility to injure or kill innocent bystanders too ?

Then possibly suicide by "firing range squad" ?

No doubt you've considered possible chaotic scenarios … ?

 

[Worndown]

It is one thing for family to be shocked at your death. That will happen regardless how or why you die.
It is another thing for the guy next to you at the range to need to wipe you off of himself.

 

[Falseunderworld]

Whatever op does may you be at peace

 

[ilovecats]

I hope you find peace. I would normally recommend giving life another chance, but if you can't even be happy, I see no reason in living. I hope you are conscious of the impact this is going to have on your friends and family. Based on what you said, I'm sure they care a lot about you, but I have agree a bit with you. You're not completely entitled to others feeling, but I can't see this as a morally correct thing to do. This decision is too important to be made out of desperation, so please be sure this is something you truthly need.