Today is going to be death or glory. Hope comes and goes so quickly. I was so determined to ctb but hope came from nowhere. It seemed to depart just as quickly yesterday. I've decided today has to be the day I make my final choice. If things go well I will remain. If the pain continues then I have to begin to prepare myself to go once more. Too many ups and downs past few weeks. To live or die is today in the hands of fate. Beginning this morning I'll begin to focus my mind again towards the worse and steal myself towards the calmness I need to finally say goodbye.
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Lost in a Dream
He/him - Metal head
- Feb 22, 2020
- 1,816
I'm sorry to hear that you lost hope so suddenly. That seems to happen a lot in life, but being stuck in this damn roller coaster ride can get old quick. If you're absolutely certain that this is what you want, then I hope it goes well for you. If you manage to find hope again and it sticks around longer this time, then I hope Recovery works out for you.
Thank you. Only one thing can bring recovery and that seems too distant. Have to set a time for change or check out. Today it either happens or its time. No more failures. Today truly is success or planning for ctb
FuneralCry
Just wanting some peace
- Sep 24, 2020
- 43,233
I believe that having hope often just leads to more suffering. It is such a cruel and unfair life and to me, life is also very disappointing and I'm sorry that you have suffered so much. I can imagine that it must be tiring being in that situation. I wish you relief from your pain in whatever option you choose.
CursedSoul
Cursed to stay, Cursed to Suffer...
- Jun 4, 2022
- 69
MsMaudlin
This is the fierce last stand of all I am
- Dec 8, 2019
- 875
