Discussion To those who have or in the past have had social anxiety what methods have you tried to overcome it?

[ButterCat]

Personally, I thought playing some kind of social game would help me so I found myself playing vrchat constantly and I do believe it helped a little bit but 80% of the time I just end up in a corner muted

 

[shyann]

I think being trying to be "funny" is what made me overcome my awkwardness sorta maybe I just say whatever comes to mind first and people find it funny and want to be friends with me but deep down I'm still nervous and feel like no one actually likes me also there's a lot of trial and error but I try lol

 

[cogmachine]

anger and spite can be quite the motivator. my throat used to clog up every time i would try talking with a friend via a call and it really annoyed me. getting mad at myself for missing out on proper interaction in a voice chat while they had fun around me strengthen my resolve. it takes a bit before something comes out, but it's a good sign when it does nonetheless, even if it's stutter-y or awkward. people in vr chat will be understanding 99% of the time, and if they aren't then those kind of people aren't worth your time. cornering yourself in a situation where you have no option but to talk helped as well. it's also better to not have a revolving door of randos, going to the same places in vr chat and try talking to the same people to avoid that loop of continuously meeting people without going anywhere. still have selective mutism but this is something i have picked up on with a lot of attempts. i don't know your exact situation, and what are you like to know whether this is guaranteed to work for you, but i hope this is helpful in some way. i wish you the best of luck.

 

[NoLoveNoHope]

I just talk to people online or have a clear goal for an interaction - it prevents a lot of the awkwardness or I just say "fk it, we ball". I've hit rock bottom once and I'll do it again!

Time for actual advice; I just play a lot of videogames with random teammates with friends I'm comfortable with since we are doing something together and we don't really care too much. Just messing around having fun, sometimes we get some really funny teammates sometimes there's more toxic people although speaking up to them especially if they're insulting a close friend or yours can help you stick up for others during more intense times. It's just baby steps I guess since I can't go outside and much prefer to be indoors with friends.

There's also not much consequence for speaking up to anyone, I remember a few days ago I called out this dude for being homophobic and racist. Told him I banged his mother AND HIS DAD. They were pretty bad anyway so I just called "racist down!" and said ggez. Small steps like that to calling out what you believe in can help a lot. I may of just called some guy a nerd with some insults but I stood up for my beliefs - I don't like discrimination. It was very funny and enjoyable while at the same time helping me grow as a person with my friends.

Hope I made sense since I made a few jokes along the way. Feel free to ask questions though just incase I didn't.

 

[NappinHappening]

4.5 years of using meth on parties and half an year binging everyday helped me a lot to get rid of social anxiety.
Now I am the person that gives other people anxieties with nonstop over sharing and misreading social clues etc.

It really erased my fear of being (at that moment) judged by what i say and made me more afraid of having uncomfortable silence.

I will literally overshare anything just to avoid being awkward with someone, later being pretty anxious about any and all conversations

 

[WeDontKnowTheFuture]

exposing yourself to others for years, do not fake what you really think or feel, being assertive, finding the root cause of your anxiety ( with psychedelic therapy for example ).

 

[noSuffering]

The worst method for overcoming social anxiety, but 100% working: poverty.

If there is no money, no food, no car, but you need to eat and move around, then you shove your social anxiety up your ass and go get money. Believe me, I sat at home for several years, trou-hikkikomori and did not communicate with anyone, only a computer monitor and pink ponies, my mother brought food. But when one morning you wake up on the ground, alone, in the forest, thousands of kilometers from home, without food, with 20 cents in your pocket, you have to survive. Anxiety doesn't go away, you just communicate and act through it. Even now I don't communicate with people as soon as I have a little money.


Truth: There is nothing good in life. It's just stupid survival. The worse the conditions, the faster you spin on adrenaline and the less time for suffering. As soon as you get enough resources for a break, you immediately lie down and realize the fucked up situation. It's like walking alone for weeks on a solo trekking in the mountains, sleeping on the ground, swimming in mountain lakes with glaciers, walking all day in pouring snow and rain, wet to the last thread, coming to a mountain lake with a glacier, swimming in it three times a day, and so on every day, and you don't get sick. You go down to the people, go home - there was a slight draft in the car and you immediately came down with a terrible cold.

The human body and brain are not designed for a comfortable, quiet life. Nature is a monster with bloody fangs and claws. Including people. For hundreds of millions of years, all of our evolutionary ancestors lived on the brink of death from hunger, cold and violence (plus infections), where everyone tried to kill each other or cooperate with others to kill. Anxiety in such a world is more than natural.