to do list for CTB

[Crazy4u]

I started working on a CTB plan last month and would love some feedback on it. Anything missing?

For the record, I am a single childless woman living alone with a dog. I don't have family here and have very limited contact with some of them/cut contact with others. I don't want any of them to know about my death.

My to do list consists of multiple sections: dog, work, school, apartment, financial, internet/phone, and final act

Dog:
- Find a good rescue
- Get rid of his stuff
- Stop auto shipment for supplies

Work:
- Resign
- Complete all final/outstanding issues if needed

School:
- Withdraw
- Clear out any outstanding issues if needed

Apartment:
- Get rid of everything
- Clean up
- Pay dues
- Terminate lease
- Move to temp. stay

Financial:
- Pay off car if possible
- Stop all auto transactions
- Payoff credit cards
- Withdraw some cash

Internet/Phone:
- Delete browsing history
- Delete messages, pics, contacts, documents, ...etc
- Delete social media accounts: twitter, reddit, youtube, ...etc

Final act:
- Buy car covers/curtains
- Buy method beforehand
- Choose location
- General day prep

 

[*Psyche*]

I started working on a CTB plan last month and would love some feedback on it. Anything missing?

For the record, I am a single childless woman living alone with a dog. I don't have family here and have very limited contact with some of them/cut contact with others. I don't want any of them to know about my death.

My to do list consists of multiple sections: dog, work, school, apartment, financial, internet/phone, and final act

Dog:
- Find a good rescue
- Get rid of his stuff
- Stop auto shipment for supplies

Work:
- Resign
- Complete all final/outstanding issues if needed

School:
- Withdraw
- Clear out any outstanding issues if needed

Apartment:
- Get rid of everything
- Clean up
- Pay dues
- Terminate lease
- Move to temp. stay

Financial:
- Pay off car if possible
- Stop all auto transactions
- Payoff credit cards
- Withdraw some cash

Internet/Phone:
- Delete browsing history
- Delete messages, pics, contacts, documents, ...etc
- Delete social media accounts: twitter, reddit, youtube, ...etc

Final act:
- Buy car covers/curtains
- Buy method beforehand
- Choose location
- General day prep

Have you thought about making plans for your final arrangements? I don't mean a funeral, but plans for burial/cremation & a plot to be placed or ashes scattered? If not, possibility write a note for the coroner letting him/her know you would like to be cremated & ashes put into a communal/potters grave site. Otherwise, your remains may be kept until your body is claimed by a family member & they will be responsible for your arrangements.

 

[AlexKy]

any plan is good until it is put to the test. What i'm trying to convey is that if you don't go trough with it you'll be left very vulnerable and i think like most of us you suffered enough. So with that in mind just leave the dog with a friend for a while (under a pretext of course). Home and work don't touch so you have your safety net.
When your dead i'm pretty sure that debts don't follow you, so if your one month arears with rent so be it. Work if you don't show for a week, i'll bet you that you'll get replaced the next one.
Anyway good luck, and if you make it Happy New Year.

 

[Crazy4u]

Have you thought about making plans for your final arrangements? I don't mean a funeral, but plans for burial/cremation & a plot to be placed or ashes scattered? If not, possibility write a note for the coroner letting him/her know you would like to be cremated & ashes put into a communal/potters grave site. Otherwise, your remains may be kept until your body is claimed by a family member & they will be responsible for your arrangements.

that is not a bad idea. TBH, I want them to throw my body somewhere near wild animals so they can eat me. I don't want my remains anywhere on earth but I don't think they will do it.

any plan is good until it is put to the test. What i'm trying to convey is that if you don't go trough with it you'll be left very vulnerable and i think like most of us you suffered enough. So with that in mind just leave the dog with a friend for a while (under a pretext of course). Home and work don't touch so you have your safety net.
When your dead i'm pretty sure that debts don't follow you, so if your one month arears with rent so be it. Work if you don't show for a week, i'll bet you that you'll get replaced the next one.
Anyway good luck, and if you make it Happy New Year.

Happy New Year to you too. I won't CTB in the next few days. I just feel safer to have a solid plan and have the knowledge and tools needed to CTB. I am against "impulse" CTB.

Most people who CTB don't leave work and home. I think about it from time to time. I'm not very concerned because I have weak SI and my method is very lethal. I should be able to succeed. If I don't, I will become vegetable. I also don't want to be a burden. It is easier for everyone If I leave everything behind.

 

[sadshrike]

I started working on a CTB plan last month and would love some feedback on it. Anything missing?

For the record, I am a single childless woman living alone with a dog. I don't have family here and have very limited contact with some of them/cut contact with others. I don't want any of them to know about my death.

My to do list consists of multiple sections: dog, work, school, apartment, financial, internet/phone, and final act

Dog:
- Find a good rescue
- Get rid of his stuff
- Stop auto shipment for supplies

Work:
- Resign
- Complete all final/outstanding issues if needed

School:
- Withdraw
- Clear out any outstanding issues if needed

Apartment:
- Get rid of everything
- Clean up
- Pay dues
- Terminate lease
- Move to temp. stay

Financial:
- Pay off car if possible
- Stop all auto transactions
- Payoff credit cards
- Withdraw some cash

Internet/Phone:
- Delete browsing history
- Delete messages, pics, contacts, documents, ...etc
- Delete social media accounts: twitter, reddit, youtube, ...etc

Final act:
- Buy car covers/curtains
- Buy method beforehand
- Choose location
- General day prep

This is helpful, thanks. I'm not at all an impulsive person…it's weird how there's actually quite a lot of stuff to do beforehand. For me, getting things sorted out and prepared is something I'm working on. Makes me feel useful for a bit. I know prep for CBT will never be perfect/many things will get missed but taking steps toward a final preparation to end the constant excruciatingly painful grief, sadness, numbness & suffering I've felt deep in my heart and bones every single day for the past 4 years is a step toward final peace. I literally have no idea how I've survived hundreds of days with the constant feeling of a heart smashed and shattered into a million tiny little bits & pieces.

 

[Crazy4u]

This is helpful, thanks. I'm not at all an impulsive person…it's weird how there's actually quite a lot of stuff to do beforehand. For me, getting things sorted out and prepared is something I'm working on. Makes me feel useful for a bit. I know prep for CBT will never be perfect/many things will get missed but taking steps toward a final preparation to end the constant excruciatingly painful grief, sadness, numbness & suffering I've felt deep in my heart and bones every single day for the past 4 years is a step toward final peace. I literally have no idea how I've survived hundreds of days with the constant feeling of a heart smashed and shattered into a million tiny little bits & pieces.

I feel everything you said deeply. There are soooo many things needed and they take time and energy. I started working on the to do list and I do some stuff every few days.

Staying alive for so many years when you are suicidal, helpless, and hopeless is a NIGHTMARE. I feel like I will lose my mind.