Help Tips on the road to CTB

[Cryptonite]

Hi everyone!

I've recently decided to start a process towards CTB (probably with SN). However, I really don't know how to get to the end goal, especially how to overcome that beast known as SI.

Do you guys have any tips? Where to start, what to do?

Thanks a lot!

 

[WorthlessTrash]

If i knew, id be gone by now.

I guess expose yourself to triggers as much as possible so you'll be pushed over the edge.

 

[Cryptonite]

If i knew, id be gone by now.

I guess expose yourself to triggers as much as possible so you'll be pushed over the edge.

sounds good, I'm wondering what's the best way to get exposed

I've been thinking of having some DMT experience and then microdosing whatever substance I will have available, SN or N, but idk

 

[WorthlessTrash]

Depends on what your triggers are and why you're depressed.

 

[Cryptonite]

Depends on what your triggers are and why you're depressed.

Depressed because of chronic spinal pain

Triggered by seeing my peers enjoying their lives

I guess

 

[Foresight]

Seek internal understanding on whether you know if this is truly what it has come down to. There's a psychological resistance because it's a big decision and a evolutionary resistance from the brain. Suicide might not be right for you, we don't know as strangers online. You have a long and deep story we will never know. Only an individual knows, and no one can help you with tips and tricks on whether that choice is right for you. For the bodily stuff a good method is helpful. Bodily resistance requires medication and a decent method planned out. I personally don't know where all this talk about hallucinogens is coming from. No imo. Sedatives, benzos, blood pressure medication, things that will dial down fight or flight, not zoink you out of the universe and cause disorientation. It's an individual choice though. I don't get the appeal.

SN is not recommended for microdosing. It has caused death in tiny amounts. It's better to get your protocol in order, get a benzo, and read up on experiences. N has been used in very small amounts and it puts people to sleep. If you've been under anesthesia or ever slept I don't think microdosing N is necessary unless you want to get a handle on the taste of it. It's going to make you drowsy and you will be gone. I think when I have N I'll do 1 small test to get to know the taste and then just do it on another occasion.

 

[Cryptonite]

Seek internal understanding on whether you know if this is truly what it has come down to. There's a psychological resistance because it's a big decision and a evolutionary resistance from the brain. Suicide might not be right for you, we don't know as strangers online. You have a long and deep story we will never know. Only an individual knows, and no one can help you with tips and tricks on whether that choice is right for you. For the bodily stuff a good method is helpful. Bodily resistance requires medication and a decent method planned out. I personally don't know where all this talk about hallucinogens is coming from. No imo. Sedatives, benzos, blood pressure medication, things that will dial down fight or flight, not zoink you out of the universe and cause disorientation. It's an individual choice though. I don't get the appeal.

SN is not recommended for microdosing. It has caused death in tiny amounts. It's better to get your protocol in order, get a benzo, and read up on experiences. N has been used in very small amounts and it puts people to sleep. If you've been under anesthesia or ever slept I don't think microdosing N is necessary unless you want to get a handle on the taste of it. It's going to make you drowsy and you will be gone. I think when I have N I'll do 1 small test to get to know the taste and then just do it on another occasion.

Thanks for useful advice

I've seen more people advising me against psychedelics and recommending benzos/sedatives, so I guess this really must be a better way to go... on the other hand, I'm wondering whether they would also lower my wish for CBT at the same time

I think DMT might be at least helpful in a global sense (outside of CBT situation), just getting you familiarized with death through NDE

When you say "get my protocol in order", what do you mean exactly? I'm not a native speaker

 

[Foresight]

Thanks for useful advice

I've seen more people advising me against psychedelics and recommending benzos/sedatives, so I guess this really must be a better way to go... on the other hand, I'm wondering whether they would also lower my wish for CBT at the same time

I think DMT might be at least helpful in a global sense (outside of CBT situation), just getting you familiarized with death through NDE

When you say "get my protocol in order", what do you mean exactly? I'm not a native speaker

I see, I think I misread because I've been seeing a few posts about taking psychedelics during the suicide. I don't see the appeal in that, but dmt on another day? Oh yea. I think that's fine to be interested in trying.

Get everything to maximize comfort. Make sure you fast. Have a nice setting. That's how my personal SI works. If I come to deep psychological terms that this is what's best for me to reduce long-term suffering it knocks down SI significantly. Then if I have a decently humane method planned out in a comfortable place to pass It knocks it down more. Some people it's just like boom, go for it with little thought and just action and that's how they deal with their SI the best. It's a bit dependent on how the person thinks.

 

[Cryptonite]

I see, I think I misread because I've been seeing a few posts about taking psychedelics during the suicide. I don't see the appeal in that, but dmt on another day? Oh yea. I think that's fine to be interested in trying.

Get everything to maximize comfort. Make sure you fast. Have a nice setting. That's how my personal SI works. If I come to deep psychological terms that this is what's best for me to reduce long-term suffering it knocks down SI significantly. Then if I have a decently humane method planned out in a comfortable place to pass It knocks it down more. Some people it's just like boom, go for it with little thought and just action and that's how they deal with their SI the best. It's a bit dependent on how the person thinks.

Actually, I've started one of these posts
I was thinking it was a good idea, but apparently it has many downsides

I was really hoping for an easy "SI cancelling" solution, but apparently they haven't invented any LOL

All of that makes sense, I'm just curious why fasting would help? I feel like eating my favourite snacks would help a lot

 

[Foresight]

Actually, I've started one of these posts
I was thinking it was a good idea, but apparently it has many downsides

I was really hoping for an easy "SI cancelling" solution, but apparently they haven't invented any LOL

All of that makes sense, I'm just curious why fasting would help? I feel like eating my favourite snacks would help a lot

I would look to the posts on SN and N and the PPH. I know you need to fast for SN. Failure to fast has caused additional risk of vomiting and failed attempts.

 

[prince345]

sounds good, I'm wondering what's the best way to get exposed

I've been thinking of having some DMT experience and then microdosing whatever substance I will have available, SN or N, but idk

I also want to do DMT before I go but I fear it might cause a will to live

 

[Cryptonite]

I also want to do DMT before I go but I fear it might cause a will to live

It's true that there can be a bad trip, but most people's experience is positive in this regard, just like in standard NDE

 

[FuneralCry]

I do not really know anything, as ctb is very difficult for me personally. It can be very difficult to overcome the SI as even know we want to die, all humans are programmed to survive. I think that many people who overcome this are likely desperate and the pain of living gets to be unbearable for them. I feel like only you will know when the time is right to leave. I'm sorry that you are suffering so much, it must be awful dealing with that health condition. I wish you the best in whatever happens.