Venting Tinnitus robbing me of life

[everbuzzingone]

March 20, 2020 was the day I noticed a very loud electrical buzzing start out of nowhere in my head, and ever since it hasn't stopped. I can hear it over everything including a loud restaurant, it's incredibly unstable, and reacts to other sounds. It has made every moment of my waking life almost intolerable. I keep hoping that one day it will fade or go away, but as I approach eight months my optimism grows to be less and less.

It's because of the tinnitus that I keep thinking of CTB. I hate how something so evolutionary insignificant can take away almost everything. Adding on that I've had anxiety for over a decade now, and depression that has become so much more intense this last year than it ever has been doesn't help in being able to habituate to it at all. I'm in my early 30's and the thought of living another 50-60 years with tinnitus this severe terrifies me to the point where I'd rather have the lights go out than endure an endless torture of noise inside my head.

I keep holding on to wait out a year or two in the hopes that maybe it'll get better and fade away, but that hasn't stopped me from trying to figure out my method when I just can't tolerate it anymore.

 

[spartanfender]

I've had a family member go through the same thing. Got to the point where he took himself to a hospital because he was on the brink of ending his life. It's already bad enough, but he also suffers from extreme anxiety that he was already seeing a therapist for. I guess it's gotten better because he seems like he's back to his old self again, but apparently it can pretty bad.

 

[everbuzzingone]

I guess it's gotten better because he seems like he's back to his old self again

Glad to hear he is doing better. Do you know how long it took for him to get back to his old self? Did his tinnitus get better or did his mindset change?

 

[reticen]

A few people have posted here about Tinnitus driving them to CTB. You can probably find other threads on it pretty easily if you search.
I also have Tinnitus, but I usually only notice it when I am reminded of it. Speaking of ...

 

[spartanfender]

Glad to hear he is doing better. Do you know how long it took for him to get back to his old self? Did his tinnitus get better or did his mindset change?

I'm not sure, but I would guess it's a little of both. I do know that Kevin Shields of the 80s/90s shoegaze band My Bloody Valentine has it. Here's what he had to say about it in an interview "I first got tinnitus in my right ear back when I was mixing [Loveless]. I remember going through a real 'everything's ruined'-type thing-- it seems like the most insane thing in the world to have this constant ringing all of a sudden. I thought, 'Well, I'll just have to work really quietly for the rest of my life and be really careful.' And then you get used to it and it doesn't really affect your life. It becomes more of a-- I wouldn't call it a friendexactly-- but it became something that would alert me if I was getting too much ear damage. If I never had tinnitus, I probably would've been a bit more reckless with my hearing because I wouldn't notice when it would get worse."

 

[Buffy5120]

F

 

[Broken Chimera]

Join the club. There's plenty of tinnitus sufferers here. Have you tried headphones to cover it up or is yours too bad for that to work?

 

[everbuzzingone]

Join the club. There's plenty of tinnitus sufferers here. Have you tried headphones to cover it up or is yours too bad for that to work?

I'm noticing that. Have a feeling that tinnitus and depression must go hand in hand. Mine is too bad for that to work and I think using headphones is the worst thing you can do for tinnitus and potentially make it even worse.

 

[Broken Chimera]

Mines must not be that bad then, because that's literally the only thing I can use to help if there's no noise around. Depression and tinnitus go together? Where did you get that from?

 

[Worndown]

My right ear sounds like a bad bearing...always screeching. The left is better. I end up ignoring it.
Yes, other sounds can trigger it to get louder. A problem for many years.

 

[elfgyoza]

I'm sorry to hear about the tinnitus, I know how difficult it can be to deal with hearing/sound issues too. Whilst I can't imagine never being able to experience silence, I have misophonia and I think that's the main reason I developed depression too - it's the constant feeling of being on edge, always anxious, that makes it so hard.
I reckon you're more at risk of developing depression if you have tinnitus as well - a lack of effective coping mechanisms would no doubt cause hopelessness and emotional distress

Have you had any luck speaking to a dr about the tinnitus?
I'd recommend trying to listen to white noise to help distract yourself when it gets bad, if you haven't already. I normally use brown noise and I know it doesn't fix the issue, but it makes it a bit more bearable :/

 

[Lilacmoon]

tinnitus can be so debilitating. I've seen how much it affects one of my friends, and it makes it so hard for her to function on a daily basis. I'm sorry yours is that severe too, and wish I had any advice to offer.

 

[Kruger]

March 20, 2020 was the day I noticed a very loud electrical buzzing start out of nowhere in my head, and ever since it hasn't stopped. I can hear it over everything including a loud restaurant, it's incredibly unstable, and reacts to other sounds. It has made every moment of my waking life almost intolerable. I keep hoping that one day it will fade or go away, but as I approach eight months my optimism grows to be less and less.

It's because of the tinnitus that I keep thinking of CTB. I hate how something so evolutionary insignificant can take away almost everything. Adding on that I've had anxiety for over a decade now, and depression that has become so much more intense this last year than it ever has been doesn't help in being able to habituate to it at all. I'm in my early 30's and the thought of living another 50-60 years with tinnitus this severe terrifies me to the point where I'd rather have the lights go out than endure an endless torture of noise inside my head.

I keep holding on to wait out a year or two in the hopes that maybe it'll get better and fade away, but that hasn't stopped me from trying to figure out my method when I just can't tolerate it anymore.

Tinnitus is living hell. Have you tried a white noise machine? I bought one on amazon and it's an absolute lifesaver. You can also find 6 hour long recordings of white noise on youtube

 

[everbuzzingone]

I've tried white, brown, and pink noise. Nothing masks it and since I have a reactive type the tinnitus competes with other sounds. Really is a living hell.

@Broken Chimera I've done a lot of reading of tinnitus studies over the last eight months and while depression and anxiety haven't been found to directly cause tinnitus, it does seem that people who suffer an acoustic trauma while severely anxious and or depressed seem to develop tinnitus at a higher rate than those who aren't. Comes down to oxidative stress and many parts/components of a person's body are less able to handle damage, trauma, and external stress while in a very anxious/depressed state. Seems to make sense to me as that's exactly where I was back in March when this started. Anecdotal, but the research does seem to point to some relationship between tinnitus and "stress."

 

[Broken Chimera]

I need to read some of those studies. You got any links?

 

[roju]

I need to read some of those studies. You got any links?

I think anyone who has been through the hell of severe tinnitus knows perfectly well why tinnitus causes depression, anxiety and insomnia. You don't have to read any scientific articles to understand why.

OP, I'm really sorry you're going through this.

 

[Kruger]

I've tried white, brown, and pink noise. Nothing masks it and since I have a reactive type the tinnitus competes with other sounds. Really is a living hell.

@Broken Chimera I've done a lot of reading of tinnitus studies over the last eight months and while depression and anxiety haven't been found to directly cause tinnitus, it does seem that people who suffer an acoustic trauma while severely anxious and or depressed seem to develop tinnitus at a higher rate than those who aren't. Comes down to oxidative stress and many parts/components of a person's body are less able to handle damage, trauma, and external stress while in a very anxious/depressed state. Seems to make sense to me as that's exactly where I was back in March when this started. Anecdotal, but the research does seem to point to some relationship between tinnitus and "stress."

Mine is caused by a brain tumour - thank god it is not 24/7. It's aggravated by MRI scans - the longest i had it for continually was about 24 hours after a scan. How anyone can stick it out longer than that (continually) is beyond me. I'm so sorry the white noise machine doesn't work for you. I have nothing but empathy for you. I also have this other thing - a kind of clicking ticking noise inside my head from the tumour. That's driving me fucking crazy as well. Now this is going to sound crazy, but have you tried accupuncture? Not the crappy westernised kind, the authentic kind? If you can, try and see a chinese doctor. That's my advice for what its worth.

 

[Broken Chimera]

I think anyone who has been through the hell of severe tinnitus knows perfectly well why tinnitus causes depression, anxiety and insomnia. You don't have to read any scientific articles to understand why.

OP, I'm really sorry you're going through this.

Re-read what he said.

I've done a lot of reading of tinnitus studies over the last eight months and while depression and anxiety haven't been found to directly cause tinnitus, it does seem that people who suffer an acoustic trauma while severely anxious and or depressed seem to develop tinnitus at a higher rate than those who aren't.

I was asking for studies on anxiety and depression making people more likely to develop tinnitus, not the other way around. I suffer from it too. But while mine isn't that severe it's bad enough to where I hear it constantly without anything masking it.

 

[Hurt]

I know many people ctb because of tinnitus. I'm so sorry ur suffering from this..

 

[Chupacabra 44]

I'm 20 years in with tinnitus. The past 5 1/2 years I've developed a nerve issue wherby parts of my body tingle as if it has fallen asleep. (The tingling in the face feels most interesting). Now, essentially it feels like these parts of my body are vibrating in unison with my tinnitus, and thus, it magnifies both conditions, and gives the perception that these are one and the same.

I set my white noise machine to the sound of rain when I sleep. Also, I listen to classical music when I'm awake. Both are fairly effective strategies for distraction in my case. Additionally, listening to classical music is thought to have other therapeutic benefits.

I take the approach that nothing is random and that there has to be cause and effect. With this approach, I've figured out associations with many of my extensive health issues. Tinnitus has been the outlier, thus far, as I continue to try to identify the variables impacting this condition. In my case, I've concluded there is significant lag time between cause and effect, but I continue to be mindful to identify what factors are contributing to my condition.

 

[StuFin]

I'm 20 years in with tinnitus. The past 5 1/2 years I've developed a nerve issue wherby parts of my body tingle as if it has fallen asleep. (The tingling in the face feels most interesting). Now, essentially it feels like these parts of my body are vibrating in unison with my tinnitus, and thus, it magnifies both conditions, and gives the perception that these are one and the same.

I set my white noise machine to the sound of rain when I sleep. Also, I listen to classical music when I'm awake. Both are fairly effective strategies for distraction in my case. Additionally, listening to classical music is thought to have other therapeutic benefits.

I take the approach that nothing is random and that there has to be cause and effect. With this approach, I've figured out associations with many of my extensive health issues. Tinnitus has been the outlier, thus far, as I continue to try to identify the variables impacting this condition. In my case, I've concluded there is significant lag time between cause and effect, but I continue to be mindful to identify what factors are contributing to my condition.

Hey that's weird I've been finding I wake up in the night feeling like my left side is tingling and buzzing and vibrating. Sometimes I can feel it in my abdomen as well and my toes.

It doesn't always happen, but is more and more frequent.

Do you think it's a similar mechanism to tinnitus, or some other kind of nerve / neurological issue?

 

[DontGiveAshiit]

Is it really a constant noise? all the time?

Man, that sucks, sorry for that...

 

[Yuki Tenuki]

Indeed, living hell!
If I where you I would see physician after physician, day after day until there's some relieve for me.
You are suffering and I know how that feels!
I hope you get better soon. xo

 

[everbuzzingone]

Thank you everyone for your kind words. To answer some questions, yes it's a constant noise and never stops; loud enough to hear over traffic, ambient restaurants, and even music.

I've been to quite a few doctors about it and the unfortunate answer is there is nothing that the medical community can do for it aside from offer "therapy." When cases are quite severe, such in my instance, there's essentially nothing that can be done other than let time pass and hope one gets used to it.

I don't have links saved to some of the papers I've read over the last eight months, but here is one that goes slightly in depth to the anxiety/depression and tinnitus relationship:

https://www.tinnitusjournal.com/art...ing-from-anxiety-and-depression-a-review.html

 

[PointlessStruggle]

March 20th was a very big day for me too oddly enough. On a more related. note, my step dad also has tinnitus, as well as severe insomnia. I think he got special headphones for it or something that emit a less frustrating noise to block it out.....not 100% what it does if I'm honest. Maybe worth looking in to

 

[Buffy5120]

Yup its the main reason im back on here i was feeling better than bam life fucks me over again i got to say the amount of times i been almost better, and then out of now where get another incurable illness, is very fucking unimaginable....but anyways im in a few facebook groups now. i have both tinnitus and hyperacusis and im not saying hyperacusis is worse but to have both Tinnitus and Hyperacusis you should pretty much just dig your grave already....anyways there are new trials on a drug called fx322 that are supposed to help this. Alot of people are waiting for the trials to be done 2022-2025 i know way to long but yeah my Tinnitus is 4 range if you look at the picture below now and my decibels ranges for Hyperacusis, are 20. Im not gunna get into what caused this and what i cant do now, because by the time i finish, it will be a long essay, but yeah my only hope is the new drug they are working on so i guess lets hope it works

Spoiler: Link

 

[everbuzzingone]

@Buffy5120 I'm so sorry you're dealing with it as well. I have very mild hyperacusis which makes my tinnitus very reactive, but my tinnitus probably falls between a 6 and a 7 per that image you posted. I've been following FX-322 very closely for the last 8 months and we're supposed to find out some details on the efficacy of the drug from the Phase 2a trial in March 2021. Hopefully it's very good news for tinnitus and hyperacusis and its release can in 2022 or early 2023 (hopeful) and not later. So many people have CTB because of these conditions and not enough has been done for it consider how many people have the condition.

 

[Buffy5120]

Yes these conditions are debilitating because most doctors have no clue what to do especially with Hyperacusis most dont even know what that is im 24 about to be 25, but yeah my whole life is pretty my thrown in the garbage now due to this i was actually on the path of recovering too but yeah are you in any of the fb groups you can pm if u are and yeah im so sorry ur going through this too do you think the drug will work though? I just kinda of heard about it from others so i didnt really research. Im worried it will mostly help people that have Tinnitus and not hyperacusis....I just feel like it will be like any other drug that could have bad side affects and idk if ill even be around by the time it gets released even if my T & H went away I have other shitty things in my life that make me want to ctb...but yeah r u going to wait till then or ctb soon...?

 

[Kruger]

BTW, things like smart meters, mobile phones, etc can make tinnitus worse.

 

[Desdemona]

I have really bad tinnitus too. Also appeared during a stressful period but from an acoustic trauma. Loud, can hear it over the freeway but my huperacusis has worsened so I can't leave the house nor use noise to mask