Discussion Thoughts on cutting (trigger warning)

[Thinking]

After a month off cutting, I went back to it and I feel happier than I've ever been. Like seriously, I no longer feel like cbt, I feel like a huge pressure has been lifted.

What are y'all's thoughts on this? Has anyone else felt this way before? Is this a good or a bad thing?

I don't think I'm addicted bc I was able to stop for a month and I don't cut that deep but idk. Also, is it really a bad thing to be addicted to cutting, since it makes me so much happier?

 

[unprecocious]

I too am addicted to cutting, and it's a great distraction from ctb, but it's ultimately one of our pathologies that have led us to this point in our lives. Worth, value, import, all subjective. And it's a huge warning sign to those around you. Advise against.

 

[make_00]

I love cutting but when I need medical attention that involves someone finding out again and I hate how upset I make my parents they don't deserve that. I wish I could live alone left to myself with my own stitching supplies so I could SI wherever and whenever in peace

 

[inactive]

It's a maladaptive coping mechanism and I'd suggest you dig for a less harmful one. I think you know deep down that slicing your skin up isn't a good thing, haha. Maybe use red pens/paint/makeup to create fake scars on your skin. That works wonders for me :)

In the event you recover from whatever issues are damaging your welfare, you're going to deeply regret a body etched with scars. Every time you look down, you will be reminded of shitty times in your life.

Just my 2 cents. Hope you work something out.

 

[lottielies]

I used to be this way but it doesn't work for me or relieve me unless I do worse every time, and the worst I've done required being taken to the hospital at 3 am for stitches. Doing worse than that will mean frequent hospital visits, which means scarring and worrying the people who take me each time. I can't do that to them. After that happened I tried to go backwards and self harm in a way that didn't require medical attention, but it no longer helped me. So now that it's lost it's effectiveness, I haven't self harmed in a year and a half. Those scars haven't faded one bit, they're still extremely noticeable. I regret it a lot, they're so visible and people always notice them. I hope you can find a healthier coping mechanism. I know it helps and gets rid of all stress and negative feelings immediately but they come back eventually.

 

[Allan that was]

I used to do it all the time and it was for a time the only thing that helped me keep it all together, I kinda got off it after going on medication and honestly reliabel chemical calm feels better than slowly shredding your arms.

 

[Blue LIPS]

What do you like from it?

Knowing you're alive and seeing the active bleed?

The pain?

The afterward scars?

Being in control?

Find that first and approach the root cause of your want to cut if you'd like to stop but in terms of cutting vs CTB if you can't stop cutting, then don't stress yourself on stopping because that's better than the other option depending on how you look at it.

 

[Sinai Silence]

First of all congrats for being clean for a month, that's a huge accomplishment. The longest I've gone without it is three months.

Like anything that provides some sort of relief it can be addictive. I do feel I've become addicted to cutting and it will always be a part of me now.

For me it helps to have some sort of physical feeling when I feel numb and also helps if I'm having a panic attack. I hope you do find a different outlet for happiness in the future, what made you decide on cutting?

In the meantime just make sure you treat the cuts properly once you've cut. The best thing is to make sure it's as safe as it possibly can be. Sending love and hugs

 

[painoflife]

I am currently in hospital with no way to self harm in the manner I want to, and what I have been able to do wasn't 'good enough' for me. It has been a very difficult couple of weeks and the nurses just advise/force you to distract yourself, which isn't much use. I was literally forced to play a board game for an hour like it would be a magic fix and I'd forget all about it. The thoughts and urges are not going away for me, and even if I distract myself they are just as strong afterwards. If anything, I feel like being prevented from it means I will do it much worse than intended when I am home and able to because its just getting more intense.
I think harm reduction is a good idea if you worry about how severe things have got, but for me I haven't been able to successfully do that and it just seems to escalate.

 

[TAW122]

I'm rather pain aversive and would not fancy cutting myself or self-injuries. Also, what others said about having scars is another reason I don't really go for it because I don't want people to get red flags and keep a close eye on me, especially if I plan to CTB in the future.

 

[VabeniPokojneTmy]

In the event you recover from whatever issues are damaging your welfare, you're going to deeply regret a body etched with scars. Every time you look down, you will be reminded of shitty times in your life.

That reminds me of lyrics of one song from my favourite band:

Zůstaň tichá, duše moje, zůstaň tichá
Otupí se osten, který zraňuje a píchá
Je to jen kámen, který čeká, až ho voda omele
A každá jizva bojovníka časem zdobí na těle

Stay quiet, my soul, stay quiet
The thorn, which harms and stings, will blunt
It's just a rock, that waits for being glazed by water
And every warrior's scar eventually graces his body

Hard times can damage person a lot, but when you get out of it, it's a valuable experience.

 

[Lost Girl xx]

Cutting feels amazing, I just hate how noticeable my scars are...

 

[Deleted member 17949]

I have a little experience but my parents stop me from doing it currently. It definitely is addictive as a coping mechanism. Unless someone breaks that cycle for me it never ends.

 

[Thinking]

First of all congrats for being clean for a month, that's a huge accomplishment. The longest I've gone without it is three months.

Like anything that provides some sort of relief it can be addictive. I do feel I've become addicted to cutting and it will always be a part of me now.

For me it helps to have some sort of physical feeling when I feel numb and also helps if I'm having a panic attack. I hope you do find a different outlet for happiness in the future, what made you decide on cutting?

In the meantime just make sure you treat the cuts properly once you've cut. The best thing is to make sure it's as safe as it possibly can be. Sending love and hugs

I started because I was dealing with a lot of guilt trauma and I felt I needed to punish myself. Like I needed to prove to myself that I had reason to be struggling. Also seeing the blood makes me feel so calm when I'm normally super on edge. Now I just do it to feel some semblance of happiness.

 

[Unlucked]

Try to stay safe with that, personally, I used to self harm. It just exacerbated my body image issues and now I can only wear long sleeves. Remember that those scars are permanent. Take care of yourself if you decide to keep doing it, use clean blades and so-on. I hope you find something else better than cutting though. :[

 

[noaccount]

That's been my experience and what I needed many times too.

 

[Living_Hurts_so_Much]

Cutting feels amazing, I just hate how noticeable my scars are...

I only found out how calming it is yesterday. It's very strange. I'm feeling numb but still cut now. Just want to drown out the world.

 

[noaccount]

These people have reasonably good harm reduction advice: https://www.selfinjurysupport.org.uk/pages/faqs/category/harm-minimisation